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Kon
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    Beyond Insanity

    Kon
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:00 pm

    Hello and welcome to Beyond Insanity, a new and unparalleled funposting extravaganza!

    The idea of this RPG came about when it was decided that both the serious and joke plots of the main RPG had grown to a point where they could no longer co-exist, and must be separated in order to stop everyone from tearing each other's hair out. Beyond Insanity (or BI) is the antithesis of the reboot RPG: a sandbox RPG with little to no structure where your primary goal is to be as stupid as possible. You can plan out plots in advance if you want, but it might be more fun to just make things up as you go along, just like how BZPB used to operate in the early days of 2008-2009.

    The Setting
    Beyond Insanity takes place on an alternate version of Meme World, which is where most of the surviving population of the universe now live. The constant warring of serious characters has led to their own destruction; with only a couple survivors being able to escape to the outer reaches of the universe, where they have settled in with the indescribably odd denizens of Meme World. The Stouttish Islands themselves have also been moved to an ocean on Meme World for an unknown reason. Because this is an alternate universe, remember that deceased joke characters such as Advanced Dal, the BDS1, and Fuk Mi may still be alive. Perhaps the Dong Squad and the Tiger Youth are somewhere here also, but serving a different purpose. The possibilities are endless.

    The Rules
    As with every other RPG on this site, all site rules apply to this one (go and read them if you haven't already). Every writing style is allowed, from prose to haikus (seriously, I dare you to write your posts as haikus for a while). Because this RPG is intended to be fast-moving, please do not feel that you have to write a block of text and be extremely descriptive in every post - I would rather have three posts in a day that are something along the lines of "Johnny goes to the bank", than only one post a week that goes into intense, unnecessary detail about Johnny's visit to the bank and what his new client had for breakfast. All posts are appreciated, regardless of their length.

    Also, unlike every other RPG this site has ever hosted, the wacky nature of this universe means that God-modding is allowed, as long as you don't kill characters or blow up half the planet without permission.

    Although this RPG is designed to give you as much freedom as possible, please do not abuse this privilege by writing things that are intended to aggravate other players. I don't expect any of you to do that but I need to say that just in case. Also, because only a tiny percentage of Meme World has been explored so far, you can feel free to add to it and also to leave it to explore SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE! Bear in mind though, most of the universe lives there for a reason. Don't go too far out or you'll get lost!

    Alright, I think that's everything, so here goes. Thanks, and have fun!
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:01 pm

    OOS: This continues on from a section of this post. The only reason this is written in prose is to set the scene, so you don't have to take this as an example of how to post.

    ----------------------------

    <Supermax F███ B████, BZPB Multiverse>

    A devilish smile spread across Steven Pinker's face as he observed Niflheim leave his company through an eldritch portal in the floor. After twenty years spent in captivity, he was finally free to seize the universe by the ass. Sure, there would be some aspects of prison life that he would miss, like beating ass with Mark Patterson and Henry Paulson (the two previous shitheads of the US Federal Reserve), but now that he had tasted freedom, he know he could never go back. Pinker walked across the room, still feeling the lingering warmth of Niflheim's portal underneath his feet, and came to a door. Behind this door was cell block 4A, home to some of the most notorious ass bandits in history. Pinker hummed a tune to himself while wondering if he should free the others so that they could aid him in his quest to claim univ-ass-al domination.

    "No." Pinker thought, "Sharing is a concept foreign to them. They'll keep the best booty to themselves. They are without a doubt some of the most cunning, primal and selfish people humanity has to offer... in that respect, they rather remind me of myself."

    Pinker briefly chuckled to himself and turned around to walk to the laundry department, where he switched his orange jumpsuit for a blue shirt and red tie. One thing he noticed while there, however, was the complete absence of guards. In fact, he didn't think he'd seen another living soul ever since he was woken by Nif's arrival: the prison itself was virtually silent, with only the faint hissing of steam in the pipes to be heard. Pinker cursed and ran into the property storage room - if his box had disappeared too, his freedom would be meaningless. He frantically pulled out every drawer marked by the letter P until he found the box with his name on it. Ripping the cellotape seal off with his fingers, Pinker tore into the box, almost praying that what he was looking for was still there. To his relief, it was: a brand-new Displacer Cannon, configured by his scientist friend Harold and smuggled into the prison on the day of Pinker's arrest to be marked as his possessions. Pinker had waited twenty years to get his hands on this device, and he wasn't going to wait another second to use it... he just hoped that Harold had entered the correct formula to make the device work. Pinker rose triumphantly from his feet and held the device in front of him, hesitating for a moment before pressing the "ACTIVATE" button with his nose.  His grip on the device tightened as it shook, and all of a sudden Pinker the Thinker was engulfed in a sphere of green, and blasted with energy the types of which have yet to be named by modern science. He closed his eyes and felt himself being flung through... something, before hitting a grassy floor.

    Pinker groaned, having bore the brunt of the impact, and let go of the Displacement Cannon to push himself to his feet. When he opened his eyes, what laid before him was like nothing he had ever seen. Cartoonish houses strewn across green, rolling plains straight out of the default Windows XP wallpaper. Lycra-wearing people screamed at the pootis-birds that flapped their way across the sky, before humping the air and throwing themselves onto a nearby road. A giant stick man stepped over Pinker and tipped his trilby at him while on his way to work. An explosion struck a group of Happy People who were working on building a wall, and the wall itself came to life and started charging into people. Pinker's jaw dropped in disbelief. This was not the ass-rich universe Harold had told him about. Muttering swears to himself, Pinker picked up the Displacement Cannon and pressed the ACTIVATE button again, but it made a harsh noise which only served to tell him that its uranium supply was deleted. Pinker dragged his fingers across his face and glared at the world beyond. He swore to himself there and then, he would find ass... whatever it takes.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:16 pm

    <Kravenhold, Original Universe>

    *Bring the Pain Barry wakes up, and realizes that he can escape from the critics through a special technique he learned from his brother years ago*

    *He begins to make the "Chant of Pain," a series of wailing sounds that are emitted in Gilbert Gottfried's voice. Meanwhile, on Meme World, Harold begins to make the same chant.*

    *Suddenly, both of them teleport to another universe*

    ---

    <Meme World II>

    *Bring the Pain Barry and Hide the Pain Harold see each other, and shake their fists at each other*

    Kind Old Man: "You must hide the pain!"

    Mean Old Man: "No, I AM THE PAIN!"

    *Meanwhile, (RED) Soldier and FAAAAAAAAK-Cupcake run up to Steven Pinker*

    Soldier: "You are not welcome in my world!"

    FAAAAAK-Cupcake: "Yeah, so you better SHAAAAAAAT THE FAAAAAAK UUUUP!"

    *They both charge at Pinker*
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:39 pm

    < US Military Air Base, Meme World >


    "sir" said the loyal soldier. "yor not going to like this...." he said and it was RIGHT. the commander looked at the radar. a little thing was coming down. they sent out F-35 lightnings to intercept. It was like a meteorite, sparking down from space. a pilot leaned from his window, saying;

    "excuse me what are you doing where are you going."

    when it didn't reply, the truth was obvious, so it crashed into the base. a big alarm sounded, and hundreds of soldiers with weapons and armor rushed out, they circled it, they point then guns at where the land landed. it wasn't a meteorite! it was a person. he got up. standing. he was tall, handsome, wearing big robes like a powerful wizard, with large shoulders, the robes were black and gold. the general stepped forwards, holding a revolver.

    "oh shit. it's kanye"

    kanye smiled, an explosion went out, the soldiers were blown back. the fight occured. hundreds of bullets went into him but he deflected them up to the sun and then down on the soldiers to set them on fire with bullet holes and bleeding. THOUSANDS of soldiers next came out, these ones had gooder guns with more bullets like what you see on a humvee car in the war films and games. they sprayed at him, but he wasn't hurt. instead, THEY were hurt. they felt all the pain so they had to stop and by then it was too later, he tied all their shoe laces together and used them as a whip, cutting everything in half and then threw it into the sun. only the general remained, he had become old and grey from the stress.

    "i will never surrender to you man, not as long as america lives. not as long as justice and america lives."

    "then you will face the same fate of destructoin."

    at that, kanye kicked the ground, his leg detached like a scorpion burrowing under the ground then it came up after the general and kicked him into the sun then reattached. kanye smiled, flying into the air, and towards where the fighting was where it was to do more fighting and win more battles.
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    Post by Zev the Reveler Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:53 pm

    < Same Meme Time, Same Meme Place >

    *Emerging from his base of operations, which is actually a very nice doghouse, Watchdoge Man surveys the situation*

    Watchdoge Man: I seem to have arrived in a different dimension, with the same intention. I need slippers to chew.

    *Thus begins the Quest for Chewing-Slippers, coming to summers next fall (but only if you're extremely unfortunate)*

    *He happens upon Bring the Pain Barry and Hide the Pain Harry, and promptly sits back on his haunches to watch them fight*

    Watchdoge Man: *Thinking to himself* Old people like slippers. This is my best opportunity to get some slippers to chew. Much thought has gone into this plan, wow, I am a genius.
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    Post by Kon Mon Mar 30, 2015 10:59 am

    <Fockville>

    *Pinker screams as he is tackled to the floor by Soldier and FAAAAAK-Cupcake, utterly defenceless against their attacks. His years of teaching at Harvard had not prepared him for this*

    Pinker: Unhand me at once, you foul creatures!

    *Fortunately for him, a patch of grassland nearby exploded, distracting the Soldier and his comrade. What looked like another RED Soldier appeared in its wake, and gave everyone nearby a menacing grin. When he saw Barry and Harry fighting nearby, he pointed at them and laughed heartily*

    Painis Cupcake: PAINIS weakness leaving the body! I will eat you!

    *Painis Cupcake then launched himself at the Old Men, and Steven Pinker managed to wriggle out of the grip of the (slightly less insane) RED Soldier and FAAAAAK-Cupcake. Pinker got to his feet and ran, though tripped over Watchdoge Man while escaping. Pinker stared at him for a moment, with the existence of Watchdoge Man only adding to his confusion*

    Pinker: ...ass?
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    Post by Klak Mon Mar 30, 2015 6:07 pm

    <US Military Air Base, Meme World>

    *suddenly a powarful hero approached kanye with twin nives and sords*

    TTT: "i have come to end yor face and live up to my family name and face Full Life Consequences!"

    *TTT attempts to cut kanye open like TREE!*

    ---

    <Meme World II>

    *Soldier and FAAAAAAAK-Cupcake laugh, and allow Pinker to leave. They begin to observe the Pain Battle before them*

    *Barry glares at Painis after grabbing him*

    Beyond Insanity Nice+try+admin+you+re+just+trying+to+get+me+to+_95ac10c278cd68c6cf12416e751425b0

    Bring-The-Pain-Barry: "I will bring the pain to your painis!"

    *He swings a large fist at Painis Cupcake's face. Meanwhile, Hide The Pain Harold shakes his head.*

    Harold: "No. You must hide the pain, not reveal it. I must be at peace."

    *Harold starts to walk away, until he bumps into a man wearing a black coat, a black suit, and a red tie. He has an inquisitive look on his face*

    ???: "Pain?"

    *Meanwhile, One Punch Man taps Watchdoge Man's back*
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    Post by JS Mon Mar 30, 2015 9:56 pm

    < US american base wwhere the fighting was >

    kanye absorbs the power of those spirits his body onse possessed and into a shield of energy deflecting away TTT that he landed against the control tower and fire onto him like so he was barning. burning (he was now on fire)

    "pssh.. nothing personell."

    began to grab those personell of the army he had made into a whip and spun it around making wind like a hurricane and threw the personell at TTT wrapping arond him to the tower, pinning him in place. then a train came towards TTT to run him over almost there it was getting closer closer and very fast.

    ---

    < Fockville >



    ---

    < Fockville >

    Takumi Fujiwara came in his car, a Toyota AE86 Sprinter Trueno.

    "get in steven pinker is you best option"
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    Post by Zev the Reveler Tue Mar 31, 2015 1:16 am

    < The Memest Kids You Know >

    Watchdoge Man: *Turns to look up at One Punch Man* Hey, it's the amazing Caped Cue Ball. How's life treating you?

    *Meanwhile, elsewhere, an angry mob of Meme World Citizens have gathered outside some kind of huge dance hall/arena/temple/disco destination funky sensation*

    Angry Mob: We demand that you give up the funk! Give us the funk now! We want the funk! Give up the funk! We want the funk, GOTTA HAVE THAT FUNK!!"

    *Suddenly, the doors fly open, and the following disco mix flows out*



    Angry Mob: Actually we do not need the funk that bad we are sorry for bothering you.

    *As a glittering dome emerges, anyone could be forgiven for mistaking the owner as having a bald head of bizarre and rainbow-hued glittering qualities, or even some kind of a spangled afro*

    *However, no; his head is a freaking' disco ball. He has a set of stylish orange shades on his "forehead," a white and orange tuxedo with suitable flair, a matching coat with orange lining draped over his shoulders like a cape, and towering orange platform shoes*

    *Somehow, this supremely funky entity - fond of brick houses and uptown funk, and eager to show the people what is love (and to probably not hurt them) - manages to spin his way all the way down the stairs and strike a pose at the bottom*

    Jravolta Tohn: Hey, all you ladies and gents! *Starts flicking his hips and gesticulating in a catchy disco dance* I wanna see you help me out! Clap your hands with me now!

    *He claps his hands above his head, and the mob finds their bodies mimicking his against their will*

    *Gyrating his hips and prorating his power, Jravolta throws himself into a pelvic thrust*

    Jravolta: YOW! *Turns his back as the entire mob explodes into a strobe light display* You've just been hit by, yes, you've been struck by...

    ...A funky criminal.
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    Post by Kon Tue Mar 31, 2015 5:57 pm

    <Fockville>

    *Pinker turned around upon hearing the 70s funk music start up, and saw the crowd gathered around the dance hall start to dance against their will. It was as if there was an invisible wave of energy radiating from Jravolta Tohn, causing those closest to him to dance the hardest, with those behind Pinker slowly being caught in the wave. Pinker frantically looked between the dancing crowd and the horrifically dated Sprinter Trueno, and decided to choose the lesser of two fates by getting in the car. At least this way he had a chance of getting some ass instead of some sass*

    Pinker: Now we gotta start let's get move!!

    *Meanwhile, Painis's mouth opened to accommodate Barry's fist, and he bit it*

    Painis: NUM NUM NUM
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    Post by Klak Tue Mar 31, 2015 10:49 pm

    <Base wwhere the fighting is happpening>

    TTT: "no not posible!"

    *TTT uses the 5 rings blocking powar to repel his enemy's attack*

    TTT: "this truely is PERSONNEL!"

    *He unleashes the 5 rings blast on Kanye*

    ---

    <Fockville>

    *Suddenly, Pinker and Fujiwara drive into a massive portal. They wake up in a bunch of chairs near instruments*

    *A bald man wearing a black shirt and black pants approaches them. He is wearing a name tag that states "Sing The Pain Sal"*

    *He raises his conductor's stick*

    Sal: "Here we go, 5, 6, 7, 8...."

    ---

    <The Memest Kids You Know>

    OPM: "I'm doing alright, you?"

    *Bring the Pain Barry screams in pain, and throws Painis Cupcake at Jravolta Tohn*

    *Harold explains the situation to the Mysterious Newcomer*

    ???: "Uhh, they don't get to bring friends..."

    *The newcomer runs up to the commotion, and raises his hands*

    ???: "Take it easy, everyone!"
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    Post by Zev the Reveler Tue Mar 31, 2015 11:16 pm

    < Meme This Way, Seem This Way >

    Watchdog(e) Man: Eh, can't complain. Although this place is kinda weird. I was hanging out hoping I could bum a slipper off one of those old guys. I really need a slipper to chew.

    *Jravolta Tohn, meanwhile, strikes such a ferocious skyward point that Painis Cupcake is thrown onto the ground*

    Jravolta Tohn: Hello there, fanciful challenger! Do you seek to have a dance to echo through history?

    < Meanwhile, in a cleverly disguised base (Read: he's hiding in the huge shipwreck and everyone knows it) >

    *Golden P'Orc tumbles into the luxurious office of the Big Boss, the Head Honcho, the Shake-Down Money-Taker*

    Golden P'Orc: *Smoking with the delicious aroma of bacon, his rose-tinted sunglasses cracked, bows very ingloriously* Oh great and mighty Cap'n of Corporate Crime snort, snort I apologize for my mistake! I went to shake down Percy Persimmon for all his dough, but he baked it into a savings account, and I got baked trying to break his thumbs! Some funky punk showed up and wrecked the casbah! And now I can't get the moolah he owes ya! I'm -

    ???: Silence! *When his booming voice is finished echoing, the towering, bald figure turns his luxurious leather chair around to glare over his luxurious mahogany desk* Ye've let me down for the last time, P'Orc! I'll be standin' for none a' this foolery! *Presses a button under the desk*

    *Golden P'Orc finds himself dropped onto a gangplank, holding on for dear life, as he is suspended above a gigantic frying pan*

    ???: I've had me a hankerin' fer some continental eggs n' bacon! *presses another button*

    *Two huge eggs are cracked on Golden P'Orc's face, as he falls screaming and squealing into the frying pan with the many egg whites and yolks*

    *Smelling the sweet success of a gigantic continental dinner, the swashbuckling executive lights a cigar; this illuminates his wicked mustache, his sable eyepatch, and the scarred eye largely hidden behind a glinting monocle*

    Corpirate: I'll see to it that this so-called "Funky Customer" pays the piper fer his misdeeds! Fer ye Can't Beat Wall Street!
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    Post by JS Tue Mar 31, 2015 11:27 pm

    <the base of fighting>

    kanye absorb the five ring blast getting stronger lines appearing to channel the power into his body into big CRYSTAls of power, two in one of his hands each, two on his foots, one in his forehead, these crystals absorb the five rings power becoming five crystal power.

    "do you not see boy, i am your god, i am the ruler of this world. i am prince of all saiyans. iccould be a powerful ally or powerful enemy of destructoin for you and your race, ally with me, together we ill ruler ovver this world)"

    ---

    <the place where takumi fujiwara was>

    Takumi: so many people in this world

    *so many people come in through doors grabbing sal, restraining him, they pour cement over him so he is cemented in place only his head is free. they unlock takumi and his good friend steven pinker."

    Takumi: INFORMATION it's an era where it travels in a second

    *his car comes back and gets in it and so does steven pinker i presume. they chain sal to the back and drag him around behind on the asphalt as they return to the city the millitary base is on fire KANYE is there. they drive up to kanye and offer sal up to him as sacrifice.*

    *so many people in this world come out of the car with guns (BETTER guns than america soldiers... like a p90 or some shit) and aim them at sal and a few at kanye because you can't manye the kanye*
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    Post by Kon Wed Apr 01, 2015 10:25 pm

    <the base of fighting>

    Pinker: Foolish man, God doesn't exist! With the power of my mind, I send you away!

    *Pinker stares at kayne, squats in front of all the military men and begins to shake. He makes a straining noise and his face turns purple as he reaches a greater level of concentration ever achieved by any man. Unfortunately for pinker, he had forgotten the teachings of his good friend Chester Mainard, who proposed in one of his lectures that if one were to open their mind, their heart and ass would follow. Pinker let rip a fart so powerful it blew all the army guys into helicopters that took off cause they were blown too. The colour dropped from pinker's face and it twisted into a more maniacal version of itself*

    Pinker: ass

    *Pinker then ran at kayne with his fingers wiggling with disturbing intentions*

    -----------------------------

    <Fockville>

    Painis: Dance? YES! My painis... in your AINIS!

    *He (or it?) does this dance, which causes Jravolta to be frozen with fear*
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    Post by JS Wed Apr 01, 2015 11:24 pm

    <base of fighting where it was>

    KANYE grabbed Pinker and dragged him into the public restroom. He kicked him into one of the stalls; Pinker reached out, grabbing him, and pulling him into the stall with him. The two struggled, pushing through the flimsy walls of the stalls and impacted the solid brick wall at the end; KANYE kicked Pinker away from him but Pinker latched on, pulling him with him. The two slid across the orange-juice covered floor. As Pinker clambered to his feet KANYE brought his foot up into Pinker's face, his head rocking back sickeningly at the impact. As Pinker stumbled KANYE grabbed him by the collar, throwing him against the wall; he fell down, shattering a urinal as he impacted it, sending fragments of porcelain everywhere. KANYE reached down and once again took hold of him by the collar, dragging the dazed ass enthusiast over to the sink, which was still running. He forced the man's head under the water, drowning him; Pinker struggled furiously, trying to escape KANYE's raw, brutal grasp. Eventually, his struggling stopped, and Pinker slid from the sink, apparently dead. KANYE wasted no time, and walked to the other end of the toilet, smashing open glass box with "In case of gritty, deconstructionist action movie fight scene" written across it, retrieving a hammer from within. He spun it in his hand, readying the claw hand. Pinker struggled to his feet, sliding across the orange juice-covered surface of the floor, as KANYE took hold of him and forced him against the wall, face-first. Reaching back, KANYE prepared a hammer blow aimed at the base of Pinker's skull, and swung...

    Suddenly, the warcry sounded. "Money can't buy my love!" (Fools who say that get the Lariat three times). So many people in this world charged in, swarming over KANYE. They began to attack, eating him, and tearing at his flesh. KANYE screamed, swinging wildly with his hammer, taking out a few of the many people in this world. Takumi Fujiwara drove in, leveling one of the walls of the restroom as his Sprinter Trueno sped through, drifting dramatically around the wreckage of the toilet stalls. But it was true. Money couldn't buy his love. Only the true, unspoken respect that could only exist between two men of science. The science of experimental psychology, and of drifting. That bond existed between Takumi and Pinker. As such, his hand reached out, taking hold of the wounded Pinker's.

    "let's move into the brand new world let's drive into the brand new trip"

    Pulling Pinker into the Trueno, Takumi revved the accelerator. So many people in this world were struggling, and KANYE had thinned their numbers. Seeing Pinker and Takumi about to escape, an infernal blaze shot forth from his eyes, cutting through so many people in this world like a hot knife through butter. It narrowly missed the Trueno as it shot off.

    "now we go full speed and funky beat"

    The Trueno shot out of the restroom, and on to the runway. It began to accelerate, and the big plane from the ending scene in Fast and Furious 6 touched down, except this time, a familiar face was visible in the cockpit. The ramp opened, and Takumi drove in. The base behind was exploding. So many people in this world were dying, and they were Takumi's good friends, and his personal militia, who had fought and died for him. Now, the meme world was entering a new, dark era.

    Takumi got out of the car as the plane took off, and went to the cockpit. Except there were two doors, one said "cockpit" (in Russian), the other said EVIL and plans (jesus christ. Not in Russian. That meme wouldn't even make sense over there, fuckboy). Takumi took the road less traveled, to the EVIL and plans department. It was under the cockpit, where usually there might be guns, but instead it was a room, with a table. Lots of people were sitting round it; masters of EVIL and plans, such as Frank "Dank" Underwood and a certain charismatic German chancellor. (i am ofcourse talking about philipp scheidemann... get your bloody head out of the gutter). Also... Sefer "Frickin'" Yetzirah?! (if you say 'sefer frickin' it sounds a bit like 'south african', fun fact)

    "ffirstly, sefer, what the FUCK are you doing in this rpg, get back to your own one. twat. secondly" said Takumi, taking a large gulp of wine to cool his nerves. "KANYE has returned."

    "KANYE?" said Sephiroth.

    "wwe thought we had sealed him away in stars, but we were wrong. he iss back and he is certified for some genocide."

    As the plane flew away from the base carrying best hopes for the future and Takumi's car, the fire on the airfield burned brightly from the battle. KANYE got out his notebook in it anything he drew came to life and drew. A fast motorcycle... with a rocket launcher.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Thu Apr 02, 2015 1:03 am

    <Sing The Pain Sal's Music Room>

    Sal: "NOT QUITE MY TEMPO!"

    *Sal slaps his restraints and breaks free. He realizes that everyone has abandoned him*

    Sal: "They're rushing, it's alright."

    *He gets on a chair and drives away*

    ---

    <FOKtown>

    *Bring the Pain Barry slams his fist into Painis's gut*

    Barry: "Stop dancing! FOR I BRING THE PAIN!"

    *The Mysterious Big Man immediately grabs an invisible belt around his waist, and stands in between Painis and Barry*

    ???: "If I make you stop, will you die?"

    Barry: "IT WOULD BE EXTREMELY PAINFUL!"

    ???: "You're a Pain guy."

    Barry: "FOR YOU!"

    *Barry punches the man, who is knocked back. Suddenly, Harold recognizes the mysterious fellow.*

    Harold: "CIA?!"

    *He is the CIA of this universe, now washed up and uncertain about his future. It seems that this CIA is convinced that the world is too big for him. He needed encouragement, and there were only two people in this universe capable of doing that.*

    *Harold starts running towards a nearby building, and starts asking around for "The Big Man". Suddenly, he hears someone laughing in the background*

    ???2: "Hahaha, dank search! Ebin meme!"

    Harold: "TYRONE! Just who I needed!"

    Tyrone: "So, which cheeky scrublord needs my help?"

    *Big Man Tyrone laughs*


    ---

    <base of fighting>

    *Suddenly, IRON MAN flies up and starts shooting at the plane*
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Fri Apr 03, 2015 1:19 pm

    < plane of the EVIL and plans society >

    iron man blast of energy hitting the plane and fire coming out. an alarm is sounding inside everyone is shaking about. dril grimaced, struggling with the controls. inside Takumi was struggling, climbing and pressed a button to open the ramp so they could see iron man.

    "i reckon he is truley invincibel" said sefer yetzirah, drinking coffee. frank underwood got a big cloth concealing something and pulled it off revealing what was underneath. it was an advanced gundam intelligently customized for aerial combat.

    "who should pilot it" asked revolver ocelot.

    "well. we'll vote on it. democracy is the way forward." said philipp scheidemann. freank underwood looked at the camera and a funny face.

    they got all the votes together in a big hat and pulled it out. "the person who will pilot the gundam to save us from iron man is... sefer."

    "categorically no." she replied.

    "ok". said the democratic man. he took out another vote. "it is... penn jillette."

    "get in." said penn jillette.

    "a heartbeat away from the cockpit seat and not a single vote cast in my name. democracy is so overrated." said frank "dank" underwood. penn jillette got in the fucking robot and teller sort of slid in like an astromech droid with his head poking out. it flew off to engage and missiles, lasers, the whole everything towards iron man. a portal opened up before the plane to take it to secret base. it was about 5 minutes away.

    "we have to hold out until penn and teller return" said takumi and got out guns to shoot from the back of the plane towards iron man. sefer went off to get more coffee. bullets hit and bounced off iron man who was truly invincibel... even the gundam would not be able to beat him. that is becasue the democratic man who had suggested that penn and teller pilot it knew it was a suicide mission he had rigged the votes. because his way was one of EVIL and plans. the democratic man got on a balaclava and parachute from the plane landing in safe neutral country of dibet.

    when he land he take off his mask, underneath is very beautiful. he see family home where inside are his brother. he goes into it and he brother sees him and says

    "oh hi mark"

    because the EVIL and plans man... is mark.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Sun Apr 05, 2015 8:26 pm

    < day time on the land under the plane of the EVIL and plans society where it was at the top of the sky>

    mean while the plane was struggling in the sky, down on the ground there was a house. it was a very lonely house which was very poorly-maintained and dilapidated even. even though it was far away from other houses, many people passed it everyday because there was a road that led to a certain flower shop. however, the shop was starting to lose customers because the people who went down the road start to get a bit sp00ked. some say that they saw a man in the house with teary eyes stare at them out th window before disappearing by swinging away on a rope when he knew he was spotted. well, the turbulence that the plane high up was experience shook the house of this man, just as he was about to inject himself with heroines.

    "fuckin hell what now" the man said as he bent over to pick up the syringe he dropped. the turbulence stopped, and he put this song on the radio. he then inject 40 heroines and had a strange vision. he saw a film set in a big city in america, before it was destroyed by yon's imperial fleet, where he was filming the mummy 4: the quest for purpose. the man smiled, but this vision faded when he heard his door knock.

    the man, feeling very sad like crying, stood up and went over to answer the door even though he only wore boxer shorts at the time. he opened the door and saw an incredible sight. a sight he never thought he would see again...............


    "t-tupac???"

    "yes it is me brendan fraser."

    "wh... what are you doing here? is this the drugs?"

    "no my friend. kanye is back. we have to stop his EVIL and plans."

    "why me?"

    "your house is the closest to my secret underground hideout. QUICK MUST GO NO TIME!"

    brendan fraser grabbed his beer-stained vest, put it on and ran after tupac as his house exploded behind him.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Wed Apr 08, 2015 12:46 am

    <plane of the EVIL and plans society>

    the invincebel IRON MAN laughs in a robotic voice and fires his repulsor blasts at Mark and his brother

    ---

    <FOKtown>

    Painis Cupcake: "I am PAINIS cupcake! I will eat you!"

    *He points at The Agent Formerly Known As CIA, and runs up to him. Barry punches Painis away*

    Bring The Pain Barry: "Only I can bring the pain!"

    *Suddenly, Barry is knocked away by Big Man Tyrone's xXx_sniper_XxX*

    Big Man Tyrone: "Haha, rekt!"

    *Tyrone stands near The Agent Formerly Known as CIA, and pats him on the back*

    Big Man Tyrone: "You are the big, biggest, big guy on Meme World (II)! You were made for excellence. Expect nothing less."

    Fmr. CIA: "But I'm not big for them."

    Big Man Tyrone: "You are, they just don't know it, those cheeky scrublords!"

    *Tyrone laughs. CIA Guy smiles, and suddenly rips off his clothes, revealing the old khaki pants, blue polo, and jacket we all know and love*

    CIA Guy: "I'm CIA!"

    *CIA Guy grabs his belt and walks up to Painis Cupcake*

    CIA Guy: "A lotta loyalty for a hired gun!"

    *Meanwhile, Soldier turns to Tyrone*

    Soldier: "You did good son, real good!"

    Tyrone: "Thank you!"
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Fri Apr 10, 2015 5:22 am

    <FOKtown>

    *The door of a nearby barn was kicked open, which swatted an unsuspecting John Freeman into the horizon. In the doorway stood a suited Rog Rogerson, who pointed an angry finger at Tyrone*

    Rog: Stop roight there ya montarge-luvin' memer! Oi'm the big man of this town, and it ain't big enuf for the two of us! Put up yer fists cuz oi'm about ta slap the willy out of yer wallaby!

    *A red-faced Rog then put up his fists and shuffled over to Tyrone, imitating the stance of a well-known stockbroker*

    --------------------

    <near a house>

    Brendan Fraser felt the effects of the heroin wearing off, and cursed under his breath. Many years of substance abuse had caused the duration of his highs to become increasingly shorter.

    "Not even drugs can save me now... I am in a world of shit," Fraser thought. Why even live anymore? I can't even see my kids without a court order."

    Fraser fell to the floor, no longer being able to muster the willpower to even stand up properly. He heard an echo in his head of the voice of the guy who played Beni from The Mummy, arguably his most successful film. As he wearily looked up, he saw a river replace the road in front of him, with Beni on the other side. "Hey O'Connell! Looks to me like you're on the wrong side of the river!" Beni shouted, causing Fraser to clench his fists with rage. He hated that annoying bastard from the moment they met on set, but never considered hitting him until it was too late, filming was over, and he'd never see him again... but here he was. This was his opportunity to finally sock that smug git in the jaw, and he was going to take it*

    "HEY BENI!" Fraser shouted back. "LOOKS TO ME LIKE I DON'T GIVE A SHIT!"

    Beni's expression changed from one of smugness to one of surprise as he saw Fraser lift himself to his feet and stagger over towards him... and then smugness again. When Fraser stepped into the river, it transformed into the main road outside his house, and he was instantly hit by a truck.

    "NOOOOOO!" Tupac screamed, but there was nothing he could do. Fraser rolled over the front of the truck and over the trunk before falling on the road. Tupac grabbed his arm and dragged him out of the way of more traffic and laid him on some grass. He then pulled out his 90s-era mobile phone and dialled the emergen-SEE services.

    "Hello, you have reached the emergen-SEE services. What is the nature of the emergency?"

    "My man got his shit fucked up, yo!"

    "SEE! We'll be there in ten minutes!"

    *The call then went dead, and Tupac knelt down to hold the hand of his friend one last time. Though critically injured, Fraser managed to smile*

    "L-looks... like... my shit got fucked up... man... but you Asved my life...."

    "Nah, it's nothin bro." Tupac replied, but Fraser weakly shook his head.

    "At least... someone cared... enough... to..."

    Fraser's eyes then flickered, and his head fell back, but Tupac wasn't ready to let his friend die just yet. "Stay with me man!" he shouted as he shook him. Fraser continued.

    "...donate to my kickstarter..."

    "Uhh... what's it about?" Tupac said cautiously.

    "brendan fraser kickstarter... one kick starter please... mummy 4 with low-budget cgi and porn-quality acting... it's the only way... uggggghhkkkkrr"

    "Oh HELL NO!" Tupac shouted, and dropped Fraser with disgust. He then stood up and walked away, leaving Fraser to slip into a coma with a smile on his face... a coma where he could literally live the dream of directing, producing and starring in an endless stream of direct-to-dvd Mummy films, with his faithful wife by his side. Truly, he can't wake up... but even if he could, he wouldn't want to now.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Fri Apr 10, 2015 12:57 pm

    < 機動戦士ガンダム >

    as iron man shooting at Mark, penn jillete flew down in path of bullets. he look to mark in last moments and says

    "best hopes for our future" and a salute. then the gundam explode killing penn jillete and teller in a huge fireball. mark look up and shock. humble inside by sacrifice but guilt with the knowledge that he set them up and they didnt know and they died to save him.

    "I'm such a manipulative BITCH!" replied mark, angrying. his brother get in his garage in his car to escape from the fighting drives around and drives next to mark.

    "get in mark is you best option" and mark got in, escaping the battlefield.

    meanwhile in the plane. dril and sefer were wrestling with the controls. takumi and his friends were shooting at iron man who was now far away so they closed the ramp at the back of the plane and got ready into the portal. captain eurobeat came into the cockpit with a little boy. english acient.

    "hello my name is arty."

    "arty we have something here for our special visitors." said sefer, handing him a model plane. "would you like to have it."

    "thank you truley much."

    "you ever been in a cockpit before?"

    "no sir ive never been in a plane before"  

    "you ever seen a grown woman naked?"

    "right that's enough" said captain eurobeat, grabbing arty by the collar and throwing him out of the cockpit. "bad sefer."

    sefer frowned. the plane went into the portal came out the other side and closed behind and now they were in the realm of EVIL and plans, all that was there a giant asteroid big like a planet shaped exactly like frank underwoods head they flew up his nostril into the hangar bay and got out hundreds of soldiers with weapons and armor came out to salute them.

    "nice nice you are relieved of duty" said bunta fujiwara, takumis dad who and was president of these guys. takumi look over to stevent pinker

    "i hope you can and help us fight KANYE who is stronger and onto the sun"

    ---

    < capital city of meme world >

    KANYE hovering just outside of city. then he put out his hand and flick about his fingers in a quick way. the whole city EXPLODE with NO SURVIVORS. KANYE fly into middle of city and find dead bodies of those his once destroyed. putting life energy into them they come back as loyal servants to KANYE. he make six rings of power and one ring to rule them all and put the big ring on him and the six rings on the six people to make them into his Nazgûl (ringwraiths, duh).

    the six people this is what they are ok -
    1. asuka langley soryu
    2. oro
    3. lord pilot
    4. george lucas (with no hair)
    5. shini zatsu enhanced mmos
    6. george costanza

    why were they all in the city? who knows. anyway KANYE got on robes and made robes for his Nazgûl to wear and then and said to them

    "find steven pinker, bring him to me."

    "yes, my lord." they said and went off to find steven pinker. then KANYE flew up to his fortress of Barad-dûr and was waiting.

    ---

    atuhor's nose

    many are wondering, why is sefer yetzirah here? this is answer.

    this sefer from a diferrent reality. BZPB-80085. well, there, she was the crazy concuestador except she took over there where you couldnt here (i dont mean "you" specifically... im referring to the working class in general). in this universe sefer banned heterosexuality. which went great until everyone died and there was no-one to replace them, and she was all alone. so she came to this reality to stop being lonely.

    does this mean there's another sefer already in this reality somewhere? could you imagine? if two sefer yetzirahs met? how horrible would that be?

    good thing nobody will ever write that, then.

    hehe.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Sat Apr 11, 2015 4:29 am

    <evil and dimensional planes>

    *still on the floor, pinkers groned and rolled over onto his back. suddenly his eyes went wide and he started choking as if he had somefing stuck in his throat. after a few moments of this he turned over and threw up the biggest, fattest YOURMUM parasite this world had ever seen. once it was done, the YOURMUM parasite slimed away and pinker's eyes changed as if he was someone diffrent*

    Steven "Forward Thinker" Pinker: "...wh... what on Earth? Where am I?"

    *as the alien guys with wepons and guns came up to the plane they looked at steven pinker and he put his hands up like instinct*

    Steven "Forward Thinker" Pinker: "I... oh dear... I can't remember a thing... am I under arrest?"

    *but the n the YOURMUM parasite came back and jumped on pinker's face. he tried to scream but the sound was muffled by the monster on his afce. when it went back inside his throat pinker turned back to like he was before, smiled and looked at takumi and the soldier guys*

    Steven "Anal Stinker" Pinker: ass

    he then went off the plane to join the others in traneing against KANYE, to be paid in ass
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Mon Apr 13, 2015 10:11 pm

    <evil and dimensional planes>

    *IRON MAN realizes the gravety of the situation and decides to halp the others so he enters their location and apologizes and offers to make amends*

    IRON MAN: "we must join forces to fight against the truest of enemeys, KANYE."

    ---

    <FOKTown>

    Tyrone: "Oh no, it is the biggest scrub Rog Rogerson!"

    *Tyrone laughs, and cups his hands together. Suddenly, he telekinetically lifts a Dorito, which he launches at Rog. Hide the Pain Harold grits his teeth. He can only hold the pain for so long.*

    *Bring the Pain Barry gets up, and points at Painis Cupcake in an offensive yet friendly manner*

    Barry: "Let's join forces to BRING THE PAIN! We should find a base to make plans."

    Sing the Pain Sal comes up behind them*

    Sal: "Now that's my tempo."

    *Soldier and FAAAAAK-Cupcake laugh, and walk up to them*

    FAAAAAK-Cupcake: "Now that is what I wanna see! Team up to FAAAAAAAAAK them AAAAAAAAAP!"

    One Punch Man: "ok."

    Soldier: "Okay!"

    CIA Guy: "A lotta loyalty for a hired gun!"

    Soldier: "Shut up, Spy!"

    CIA Guy: "If I keep talking, will you die?"

    Soldier: "It would be extremely painful."

    CIA Guy: "You're a crazy guy."

    Soldier: "For you! SCREAMING EAGLES!"

    *Soldier punches CIA Guy, and knocks him out*

    --

    *Meanwhile, a man wearing a hood watches from afar*

    ???: "It is not my time yet, friends."

    *He disappears*

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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Fri Apr 17, 2015 12:24 pm

    < nice base >

    bunta fujiwara take hand of iron man and shake it and a proud nice over them.

    "for great justice." said bunta fujiwara. sefer looked like on in amazement.

    "Wow." she said. "So now our force consists of Iron Man, Steven Pinker, Takumi Fujiwara, Revolver Ocelot, Dril, Frank Underwood, Philipp Scheidemann and Captain Eurobeat? This has gone Beyond Insanity."

    Captain Eurobeat turned to the camera. "That's it. That's the name of the RPG."

    "perhaps we can be off insistence." said mysterious warriors approaching. the first was a powerful spirit of light, his name was morpheus, also and next onto him his good friend sephiroth from the good final fantasy games.

    "yes hello." said bunta. now in a big circle. bunta is speaking nice and firm. like my dad. authoratative tone and english acient. "to destroy KANYE we must put the ring of power into the flames from which it was born. the fires of mount doom. in memedor."

    "One does not simply walk into Memedor." said Captain Eurobeat, his gaze fixed directly on the camera as he did. "Memedor. We're geniuses."

    "we must create a fellowship to take the ring off KANYE and cast it into the fire." replied bunta.

    "you have my twin nives and sords" said morpheus.

    "and you have my... *spins guns* ...revolvers." said shalashaka, also known as revolver... ocelot!

    "and my ASS." replied sefer, falling off her chair in hysterical laughter. pinker shifted nervously. "get it. my fucking ass. holy shit. no seriously it's my only redeeming quality."

    "now we've got." said Takumi, looking around happily at everyone for the justice. Iron Man, Steven Pinker, Takumi Fujiwara, Revolver Ocelot, Dril, Frank Underwood, Philipp Scheidemann, Captain Eurobeat, Morpheus, Sephiroth and Sefer Yetzirah. Together they would save meme world, or die trying, probably the latter. "so, let's get move." they said, and got ready to ride to memedor.

    ---

    < User Malygos's house >

    Having returned from a viewing of Verdi's Rigoletto, which had been brilliantly sung by Vladimir Dragos, Malygos had retired to his expansive French colonial mansion on the outskirts of Memedor. However, then came a knock at his door. He climbed out of his four-poster bed and threw on a nightgown, hurrying to the door and opening it. The Nazgul were outside.

    "steeeeeeeveeeeeen........ piiiiiiiiiinkeeeeeeer........." said one of them.

    "man i don't even know." replied Malygos, closing the door.

    The Nazgul shrugged, and carried on riding.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Tue Apr 21, 2015 5:34 pm

    < FOKtown >

    Rog opened his mouth and chewed the dorito, but underestimated its hotness. When he next opened his mouth, he burped a jet of fire at Tyrone.

    Meanwhile, Soldier's head tilted back and his face began to contort in various ways before addressing the group again. "Well then maggots, anyone have a FAAAAAking place to stay? I've been eating trash, and maggots, and FAGGOTS on the streets! If only you knew how hard the life of a true American soldier was, you'd give me all your money!"

    The others stared at him with blank expressions, and he began to have a flashback.

    -------------
    this is were the flashback start
    -------------

    soldiers in an ally, digging in trash for food. some drug guy comes along

    druggy: "hey man ive got these drugs man, i got heroin, We'd, cocainum... merasmus likes tht one... u know"

    soldier: "NO! drugs are for hippies! I will slap the drugs out of your mouth!"

    soldeir then slapped the guy really fast and hit him on the bum too. the drug guy didnt fight back cause he was hi, so soldier got bored and picked him up and throw him in a trash can. a voice inside the trash can said "Ow, watch it will ya, this is occupied!"

    soldier stared at the trash really angry like. "No... this is RORRZUS!" he then picked up the druggie again and throw him across the street. two ugly faces, one orange one yellow like rubber peeped out of the can. the orange face speak to him

    "Hey, stop it! Brendan's had to deal with enough shit already, he doesn't need punks like you throwing him about!"

    soldier angry "grr... maggot" he then walk off and dig for trash somewhere else. kranxx and spanha go back to eating trash and making out

    ------------------FLASHBACK END----------

    --------------------------

    < cool base 4 cool guys >

    Steven Pinker: You have my left fist, and my right fist, and my ass
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    Post by JS Tue Apr 21, 2015 9:01 pm

    And so, the fellowship set off on their journey.

    CHAPTER 1: WHAT IT MEANS

    < The Democratic People's Republic of... Bedford >

    A small learjet touched down by some hangars, and the fellowship of EVIL and plans emerged, with black bags over their heads, and their hands were tied up. Nice guy in a blue jacket was with them, he was CIA english cousin, MI6. Not to be confused with SAS, he nasty, he hit me. and soldiers with weapons and armor by the plane. An offroad vehicle came up to them, and MP for Bedford, Richard Fuller (Conservative) climbed out.

    "Cpt. Eurobeat, I'm Richard Fulller." he said, grabbing individuals and throwing them into the car.

    "He wasn't alone." said MI6.

    "Uh, you don't get to bring friends." replied Richard Fuller.

    Captain Eurobeat turned to the camera, winking. "They... are not my friends."

    "Don't worry." replied MI6. "No charge for them."

    "And why would I want them?"

    "have you seen my ass?" interrupted sefer. however, she was swiftly elbowed by MI6.

    "They were trying to grab your prize. They work for the mercenary. The masketta man."

    "Blair?" replied Fuller, startled. "Get them onboard." he said, to himself, as he had no men. Everyone was a bit confused. "I'll call it in."

    The entire fellowship of EVIL and plans got in the back of Richard Fuller's car, willingly, and it drove away.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Fri Apr 24, 2015 6:37 pm

    < FOKtown >

    *Tyrone is set on fire. He rolls around on the ground and puts it out*

    Tyrone: "HA! Nice try!"

    *He gets up, and charges at Rog with the strength of a thousand subscribers*

    Sing The Pain Sal: "It's okay, I have a place."

    Barry: "Is it extremely painful?"

    Painis Cupcake: "no"

    Barry: "oh"

    *Soldier, FAAAAK-Cupcake, Sal, Barry, One Punch Man, and Painis Cupcake leave to the Pain Music Studio (As Seen In Whiplash™)*

    *CIA gets up*

    CIA Guy: "Was leaving me part of their plan?"


    OOS: You can take over from here, Kon.

    --

    *The Mysterious Man searches for the Corpirate*


    ---

    <Underground>

    *A yellow fellow lies dormant, as his mission had been complete. He had rid many worlds of a dangerous type of animation. Suddenly, he shimmered to life, as he sensed many insane things happening on Meme World II. You might say it was Beyond Insanity after all. He gets up and shouts in a robotic voice*

    ???: "IT BEGINS!"

    ---

    < cool base 4 cool guys >

    IRON MAN: "now that's what im talking about yes"
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    Post by Heat Fri Apr 24, 2015 7:44 pm

    <nice base>

    A purple avian creature appeared in front of them, grinning to the maximum possible extent that someone with a beak instead of a mouth could grin. "I am coitus. I am... Caiaphus. RELEASE THE SEX GAS!"

    Suddenly, several Apprentices also appeared, and started throwing smoke grenades at them. However, instead of releasing smoke, they released a purplish gas known as SEX GAS.
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    Post by JS Fri Apr 24, 2015 7:47 pm

    < bedford >

    "The flight plan I just listed with David Cameron lists me, my men, Captain Eurobeat here, but only one, of you. First one to talk, gets to stay in my landcraft!"

    "first :p" replied Sefer, grinning. The rest of the fellowship groaned, but their dismay was shortlived as the Nazgul swarmed over the car, sending it flying across the road. Richard Fuller was thrown from the vehicle, which came to a stop before the wooden castle in Russel Park. TMV looked down from the barricades high above.

    "looks like weve got an assalt boys."

    hundreds of children with weapons and armor appeared on the castle walls and began firing down at the car. bolets were strong and cut into the armor and an explosion, lucky for the fellowship they got out and into cover behind big rocks. however, there was lots of children with weapons and armor, and they had a big castle. the nazgul were circling around. it was a three way battle. takumi fujiwara got out two p90s for everyone except sefer who could not be trusted, however because she was a jew, she could materialize a galil out of thin air, calling upon ancient ancestral powers. it was a bit racist tbh, but a gun's a gun.

    "now we've got so let's get move" said takumi, gesturing. him and frank underwood pop out of cover and spray towards the castle providing covering fire as sefer and captain eurobeat sneak out of rocks and dig tunnel under inside castle. the nazgul is swarming around and go in for the kill. george costanza swarm in close on his horse towards takumi and pull out baseball bat for kill attack.

    "look out takumi."

    takumi hearing words at last moment and duck. then he aim gun and shoot into george constanza blood spraying out and he falling off horse and then hundreds of children with weapons and armor shooting him. however, lots of them killed when oro and lord pilot set up bazooka and into them and shoot rockets that explode.

    "damn. we're taking heavy fucking losses." said velt, a fat greasy individual in a string vest. "im calling in air support."

    meanwhile, sefer and captain eurobeat climb out of tunnel underneath and inside castle. they shoot the guards fighting from corridor to corridor and fighting way to top. the twins from the second matrix film come and start cutting with knives. outside the bullets are everywhere, takumi looks across. morpheus got a bullet in what is bleeding. sephiroth (from the good final fantasy games) is dead and blood pooling out. then he hear sound. two F/A-18 Super Hornets were flying above and swoop down. They unleashed cannon rounds towards them. Takumi grab his good friend Steven Pinker and pull him away before an explosion engulf the rocks they are hiding behind. morpheus and sephiroth are dead, frank underwood however is survive. whole body gone dark pitch black like evil.

    "nanomachines, son."

    he jump up onto plane and punch it in half. then he take front half with gun and use it like gun shooting down other plane as he falling. the plane explode in a fire and crash into the castle blowing up the wall and killing the evil twins from the matrix inside. takumi run to storm it when hand goes around foot.

    "i can feel it. bleeding out of me."

    "blood?" sadi takumi fujiwara looking down to richard fuller who had been hurt by the combat.

    "political. capitol. i'll never recover from this." said richard fuller. "war on the streets of bedford." he said and died. takumi fujiwara shedding little tear, then run up wall into castle and shoot. captain eurobeat and sefer climbing up stairs. the nazgul come in closer, sefer throw a sex gas grenade that hits george lucas (with no hair) and he fall off his horse and chase after velt. the two disappear down the hole digged by sefer and captain eurobeat and a grenade then make the roof fall in covering up the hole. the fighting was violence. people dying left and right. takumi run out of bullets so he throw gun instead that cuts five people in half then he looks at the camera and winks. all the guys falling into a circle shooting around them.

    "fuck this. we shouldn't have eco'd." said sefer. she picked up an ak-47 what the evil velt commander had used and began to shoot. revolver ocelot exploded and then dril ran away, and some of the nazgul were left and were mortaring the castle. an explosion leveled one of the towers and it fell down and crushed some guys what werent main characters.

    "we need to get inside." said frank underwood. they found the gate and went to get inside but when it was open standing behind it was Darth Mark in black robes standing mysterious. he put out a lightsaber and a blade of it comes out and two like a double-bladed lightsaber.

    music starting playing.

    "we'll handle this." said phillippe scheidemann and him and captain eurobeat. towards Mark with their and get out lightsabers.

    "we'll take the long way." said princess sefer "padme amidala" yetzirah walking off with the rest of the soldiers. Mark fighting philippe and captain eurobeat and inside into a huge energy production plant with big towers through an energy field and WRRRM WRRRM SHICHSHSHSHSHS WRHIRIRIRHMMM is the sounds produced. meanwhile sefer and soldiers fighting valiantly but one died but they kept fighting because they needed to for justice. VRRRMW WHHWMWM WHMMMM and they flipped and flicked around and flew up onto more bridges. then darth Mark put sword through phillipe scheidemman oh no!

    captain eurobeat so angry he got in and cut mark in half. he fell into the hole but did he die? anyway. youll find out in the sequel. i promise. sefer fight to the throne room. in there is TMV.

    "surrender." said sefer.

    "no your not my mum."

    "no, i am your mother."

    "no. no. that's not true! that's impossibel!"

    "search your feelings; you know it to be true."

    "nooo!" said TMV like a whiney bitchboy. "noooo!"

    "TMV! you can destroy KANYE. he has foreseen this. it is your destiny. join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as mother and son!" she said, frowning and turning to the camera. "doesn't really have the same impact, does it?"

    tmv looking around and sees around him big hole to which he is previously unaware.

    "come with me." said sefer. "it is the only way."

    TMV instead opting to jump down big hole. then the soldiers are surrendering and the nazgul retrate away back to the KANYE lands.

    "a winner is us." said takumi fujiwara. captain eurobeat looking to sefer and a laugh come out and said.

    "haha. where'd you get that one from?" he said.

    "yeah thats right haha". she said. "i made all that up didn't i."

    or did she?
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    Post by Heat Fri Apr 24, 2015 7:49 pm

    update: Everything I just posted happens wherever Sefer and co. actually are
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Fri Apr 24, 2015 7:58 pm

    <bedford>

    *TTT sudddenly appears*

    TTT: "where is my cousin is he safe did he defeat the enemys?"

    *IRON MAN turns to "Caiaphus" (maybe an imposter) who released the SEX GAS*

    IRON MAN: "that doesn't work on me imposter, I'm freaking Tony Stark."

    *IRON MAN drops dollars on the floor and a female Apprentice falls in love with him*

    *TTT is affected by the gas and starts running to Sefer*
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    Post by Heat Fri Apr 24, 2015 8:00 pm

    *The female Apprentice, lovestruck, rips off her gas mask and inhales the sex gas*

    Caiaphus: And yet...

    *She runs into IRON MAN's arms and starts ripping off his armour*

    *Caiaphus laughs maniacally*
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Fri Apr 24, 2015 8:14 pm

    <Bedford>

    *Obi-Wan Kenobi suddenly appears, and tackles TTT*

    Obi Wan: "Don't try it!"

    TTT: "you underestimite my powar!"

    *TTT leaps into the air, and Obi-Wan does so as well. They now on the roof somehow, and away from the SEX GAS*

    Obi-Wan: "It's over, TTT! I have the high ground!"

    *TTT falls off the building because the high ground means that you win. TTT teleports away and telepathetically contacts Obi-Wan*

    TTT: "i wil return"

    *Meanwhile, the female apprentice taking off IRON MAN's armor sees a rocky interior*

    IRON MAN: "Sorry, that's not kosher. IT'S MASHING TIME"

    *IRON MAN bursts out of his armor, revealing him to be The Object, an original character do not steal (totally not copied off of The Thing). The Object starts fighting the apprentices, hoping to clash with Caiaphus (possibly an imposter)*

    OOS: Waiting on Kon for the rest
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    Post by Heat Fri Apr 24, 2015 8:29 pm

    <Bedford>

    The female apprentice shrieked when she was thrown off by The Object. She clung pathetically to his leg as he attacked her friends, who fought back by throwing more sex gas grenades at him.

    Meanwhile, Caiaphus laughed, grabbed her abandoned bandolier, which was full of gas grenades, and began to follow Sefer.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Fri Apr 24, 2015 8:38 pm

    < bedford >

    sefer turned to caiaphus

    "oh, you think the sex gas is your ally, but you merely adopted the gas! i was born in it, molded by it!"

    at that, sefer brought all the sex gas towards her like an evil aura surrounding her and fired a blast of it at EVERYONE turning the entire battlefield into a fucking.... god... you know what. stupid fucking hell.

    jesus fuck this is so shit compared to the main rpg.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Sat Apr 25, 2015 9:44 am

    < badford >

    *Steven Pinker, who has been in some sort of trance the last ten posts or so, suddenly snaps back to... (well it's not reality, so... insanity? Yeah, that works) upon inhaling the SEX GAS. He smiles smugly like so, turns to the camera, and whispers one word*

    Pinker: gass

    *Pinker's mouth then makes a vacuuming noise, and sucks in all the SEX GAS in Russell Park. The gas drives him into a frenzy, and he grins ecstatically upon seeing Caiaphus*

    Pinker: caiaphass

    *He charges at him*

    *Meanwhile, some of the gas that escaped the park makes its way into a cyclist named Mad Bob's nostrils, which causes him to crash into his own traffic cones*

    -------------

    < FOKtown >

    *Rog doubles over in pain as Tyrone punches him in the gut*

    Rog: Gah... you've won this round, ya loli-lovin' rascal... oi'll be back!

    *Rog limps away*

    *After he leaves, a jeep parks in front of CIA, and several masked and unmasked figures step out*

    -------------

    < Underground >

    *Suddenly Boltman hears a voice in his head*
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Sat Apr 25, 2015 11:12 pm

    <Bedford>

    *The Object shakes his leg*

    The Object: "Now is not the time for love. That comes later!"

    *Obi-Wan jumps in front of Steven Pinker*

    Obi-Wan: "Don't try it!"

    ---

    < FOKtown >

    Tyrone: "What a meme! Subscribe!"

    *Tyrone laughs and leaves withtThe Kind Old Man, aka Hide The Pain Harold, who was experiencing significantly less pain this time around*

    CIA Guy: "Dr. Pavel, I'm CIA."

    ---

    < Underground >

    *Boltman snarls. You see, there was only one enemy that he had that was greater than the scourge that was anime and manga: MoonMan. They had once been friends, and had gone to many Chargers games and McDonald's together. However, one day, MoonMan snapped and resorted to constantly using racial epithets. Boltman, a firm believer in equality, told his friend to stop. When he came to confront him, he said "IT ENDS," but it was too late. MoonMan was on his computer, blasting an episode of Boku No Pico. This offense was the last straw on an already strained friendship. MoonMan and Boltman have been enemies ever since.*

    *He sent the following telepathetic message to MoonMan*
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    Post by JS Sun Apr 26, 2015 4:30 pm

    < Bedford >

    sefer sighed at having her sex gas stolen from her, and sat down on a local bench to wait out the battle. she heard a little. ssss. slithering like a snake near her feet. looked down. a goa'uld jumped up into her mouth! and it crawled inside her and controlled her and the eyes glowed white.

    "ah! after ten thousand years i'm free. it's time to conquer earth!" said user heat, who was the goa'uld that was possessed sefer. a big stargate opened and hundreds of jaffa with staff weapons and armor came out with system lord heat's personal mark on their foreheads. they began to kill with staff weapons and performed non-stop deadly actions. "kree" said heat (fuck knows what that means) but it made the jaffa shoot faster and with more passion. so much passion captain eurobeat defected to their side because he was a man of passion who sought out passion.

    "captain eurobeat you fucking traitor." said the loyal soldier who had been with him since KANYE attacked the airforce base.

    "my only loyalties are to love." said Captain Eurobeat, standing up dramatically on a rock and posing. because of this he was targeted by a sniper that shot him off both his arms and he fell down. american sniper. from the american sniper film. by that i mean ofcourse frank underwood.

    "if you fuck with me you are just gonna end up with cum all over your goddamn face." said frank underwood, putting another bullet in the sniper. but it was shot out of his hands by user heat with that cool glove of the goa'uld that he had picked up and was to use. then hundreds of jaffa surrounded him.

    "surrender."

    frank underwood agreed. and they took frank underwood and captain eurobeat into user heat personal car "the car of poland" the car that was the pride of poland for its remarkable engineering and nice dresiarz-proof windows. however, because there was a real poland, and two space polands, no-one knew to who the car of poland belonged. takumi fujiwara jumped inside and began to kill. with a p90

    "mind telling me what you're doing in that car?" said MI6 on the radio.

    "sir. finishing this fight."
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Thu Apr 30, 2015 5:06 pm

    < FOKtown >

    Barsad squinted at CIA like he was about to sneeze. "He wasn't alone," he said while signalling his men to bring forward the other prisoners. "They work for the mercenary. The masked man..."

    "BANE?" CIA inquired, with a vein throbbing on his neck. Barsad noticed the vein, and looked concerned.

    "VEIN?"

    "Uh, you don't get to ask questions."

    Barsad nodded, and backed away. CIA turned around to tell his men to get them on board, but there was no plane behind him. Coming to the conclusion that it must have been stolen somehow without him noticing, CIA whipped his pistol out and aimed it at the prisoners.

    "Alright. First one to talk gets to stay on this planet!" he shouted, and grabbed Barsad. "Who paid you to keep me distracted?! A lotta loyalty for a hired gun!!"

    "Or perhaps he's wondering why someone would accept some prisoners, before checking who they were first?" The tallest prisoner said.

    CIA walked over to him and pulled the bag off his head, revealing the prisoner to be Lalli CAIN all along.

    "At least you can talk! Who are you?!"

    "Cain. Lalli Cain. Like the two murd-"

    "Shut up Lalli. WHO PAID YOU TO GRAB DR. PAVEL?!"

    "That's confidential."

    Lalli suddenly headbutted CIA, breaking the agent's concentration once again and allowing himself to escape. Barsad turned to one of his men with a confused expression.

    "I thought we were supposed to be delivering Bane to this guy?"

    "Change of plans. He's had to return to the darkness..."

    "Darkness? You mean-"

    "Yes... otherwise known as Bedford."

    ---------------------------

    < Bedford, the car of poland >

    "WITH NO SURVIVORS!"

    Takumi turned around to see none other than the big guy himself in the back seat. Bane climbed out of the car through the sun-roof, slid down the side, picked up a Jaffa staff weapon and used it to fight the evil guys! But then he got shot and fell over. Steven Pinker's parasite, Richard Dawkins, took control and defeated the Jaffa with extreme religious intolerance. Once they were down, Pinker ran over to Bane and examined his injury.

    "You've been shot! I have to cauterize the wound."

    "N-no... it would be extremely painful..."

    "You're a big guy-"

    "For you!"

    Bane and Pinker then stared into each other's eyes and realized that they had both found the ass they were looking for. Some other stuff happens after this post but I ain't writing no gay sex scene son. You get the idea. UUUU
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    Post by JS Thu Apr 30, 2015 7:08 pm

    < Bedford >

    system lord heat looked at the homosexuals and a tear falled out and wished such homosexuals could occur in his own life. then he had a thought that was like 'it could!'. heat decided to fufill his lifelong passion by going to the local bedford lesbian club called "the local bedford lesbian club".

    < The local bedford lesbian club >

    heat strolled in and sat at the bar. the bartender, who realistically was very obviously user malygos in a wig, came up to him.

    "asscuse me sir" he said, in an awful french accent. "ahm afraid that ah cannot serve you eef you do not know z leesbian password."

    "but. i am the homosexuals." replied heat.

    "ah understand, sir, bat ze rules are ze rules, and ah would be terminatéd immediatély if ah served you, comprendes-vouz?"

    heat totally did fucking comprendes-vouz. he was bummed out of the fuck. he look across the bar and saw lots of famous lesbians. hillary clinton. michelle rodrgiuez. samantha carter.

    oh shit! samantha carter!

    the good song from the matrix started and sam's gouldy senses (like spider senses) activated. she flipped down the table like a cartwheel and kick heat out of the lesbian club into the park by the wooden castle.

    < Bedford >

    heat got two staff weapons and dual wield them like lightsabers but sam got them and ripped them in half and put her arm down heat's mouth and pulled out the goa'uld and put it on the floor. sefer breath a sigh of relief now that heat was out of her.

    "jesus." said sefer. "i haven't had another woman's arm that far inside me since-"

    the car of poland hit her and crush her against the wall. "get in" said takumi fujiwara. all the good guys got in. the jaffa were fighting local chavs now and distracted. "we can make a run for memedor whilst theres still time" he said, reversing and revving up the engine. he drove onto the main road and ready.

    "now we've got so let's get move."

    takumi driving so fast and drifting every corner. he went along the secret mountain passage to memedor that could only be accessed via drifting. mt. akina was name of this path. because it went on the mountain called mt. akina. vin diesel chasing him, and drive alongside him.

    "we are of justice." said takumi. vin diesel replied, but it was vin disel, so who knows what the fuck he said. they were racing. trip to the world yo here go unknown world e to. umareta bakari no tabibito. narenai ashidori mo mata aikyou. KIMERU toko dake BASHItto! So many people in this world toki ni chuushou tokamonai wake ja nai kedo, SHIMANNAI toko ha warp shite kou suji dake ha tooshite ikiteru That's our law!

    takumi fujiwara seen the last corner. vin diesel angry and his BONES began to get angry. takumi pressed the drift and the drift spun. he spun behind vin diesel to look like losing but whacked the back of vin diesels car and it flew in the air and died.

    "massive." said frank underwood. takumi drift the last corner and up a ramp and flames come out the ground and red sky, and an evil eye watching them. they weren't in kansas anymore.

    (they were in memedor.)
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Thu Apr 30, 2015 7:20 pm

    <FOKTown>

    *CIA Guy gets up, and grabs Barsad by the collar*

    CIA Guy: "Was getting him to escape part of your plan?!"

    --

    *Boltman bursts out of the ground and flies towards the moon*

    Boltman: "IT CONTINUES!"

    ---

    <PAIN Base>

    *Bring The Pain Barry, Sing The Pain Sal, Painis Cupcake, Soldier, One Punch Man, and FAAAAK-Cupcake are sitting at a table*

    Sal: "I sense something in the HahaJu'stSe'ying energies. It appears that KANYE has been defeated."

    Barry: "NO! This does not bring enough pain. We must act together and strike against the good guys."

    OPM: "ok."

    Soldier: "Yes! I have an idea!"

    Barry: "Tell us!"

    Soldier: "We will disguise ourselves as hippy robots and walk up to them saying that we are harmless hippy robots, then we will beat the CRAP out of them!"

    Barry: "That's a dumb idea."

    Sal: "Yeah, that's not quite my tempo. It's okay."

    FAAAK-Cupcake: "I LOVE that FAAAAAKING idea!"

    Barry: "Well, we should do it then."

    OOS: Dun dun dun!

    ---

    Bedford, the car of poland

    *Obi-Wan is horrified. It seems that he did not have the high ground, meaning that the battle to stop Pinker was lost. He leaves, hoping to show others the true path of the Jedi*

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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Heat Wed May 06, 2015 2:20 pm

    <PAIN Base>

    suddenly, this man appears!! (except he is wearing a fedora):

    Beyond Insanity Ffn_gu10

    GRANT GUSTIN: good evening chaps *tips fedora and sits down next to then* why, this has gone terrible wrong, I dare say, gentlemen. but we shall prevail. as william shakespeare once wrote, "some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them." we are the last ones. obviously. *winks*
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Wed May 13, 2015 7:33 am

    <PAIN Base>

    *Soldier runs up to GRANT GUSTIN and frowns*

    Soldier: "You're not a real pain bringer! You are an ACTOR!"

    *He grabs a grenade from his sash*

    Soldier: "C'mere, sweetheart!"

    Painis Cupcake: "We will eat you!"

    Bring the Pain Barry: "Wait, there's no need for that. Why don't you prove to us that you can bring the pain? And not what some website calls pain, alright? Real pain!"

    OPM: "Yeah!"

    ---

    <Memeworld II's Moon>

    *Boltman lands but is captured by evil Moon henchmen. He is put in a cage to be brought to the villainous Moon Man*

    OOS: Waiting on Kon for Bill Wilson.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Kon Mon Jun 01, 2015 9:41 am

    <Memeworld II's Moon>

    Boltman [shouted robotically] in frustration as he rattled the bars of his cage. He was loaded onto the back of a truck that had a cabin shaped like Moonman's face, but with the chin pointing up into the air so it didn't scrape against the ground. Boltman grabbed the bars of the cage and tried to pull them apart, but unfortunately the bars were made of pure Superbowlium, his one weakness. After giving it some thought, an idea struck him. He knew of another way out, but one that would almost certainly result in the death of the fuckening moon entirely. Considering himself better than MoonMan, Boltman decided to give the moonlings one last warning before he cast the storm upon them.

    "I have one last warning for all you moon men. Release me now or meet your end. This yellow fellow's no longer mellow, so if you don't let me out I'll turn your insides to jello!" Boltman chanted rhythmically, but the Moonlings ignored him, instead choosing to draw some moonrunes on the truck's dashboard out of boredom.

    Boltman: "You only had to listen. I told you I was dangerous. Now all the moon men shall face the vengeance of BOLTETHEUS!"

    Suddenly, this song started playing, and Boltman was struck by a continuous stream of lightning, coming from seemingly nowhere. When the lightning intensified to the point where Boltman was no longer visible, it subsided to reveal a whole other form entirely. BOLTETHEUS roared, stamped its feet and ripped the back of the cage clean off. The truck halted and one of the moonlings went round the back to see what the problem was, but was greeted by BOLTETHEUS's muscular form bodyslamming it into the ground. BOLTETHEUS stood up and peeled the flattened moonling off its glorious yellow abs, folded it into an aeroplane, and then threw it into the sun.

    The moonling turned paper plane screamed as it plunged into the core of the flaming celestial body. It closed its eyes, expecting to die a painful death... but it did not. When it opened them, it found itself in a strange cavern made of fire, with a young child sitting down and drinking a can of Monster energy. When the child saw the moonling, his eyes widened and he ran away.

    TMV: "DADDY! DADDY HELP ME PLEASE!!"

    ----------------------------

    <FOKTown>

    Barsad: aye

    Barsad then slapped Wilson's face with both of his hands repeatedly, all while making a strange buzzing noise with his mouth. When Wilson could take no more and fled the scene, BANE? and Steven Pinker returned to Barsad's jeep, hand in hand.

    Barsad: BANE? Uh, you don't get to bring friends.

    Bane: He is not my friend... Wink

    Barsad: Why would I want him?

    Bane: Because I'm the boss and you do what I tell you, you little shit.

    *Bane ripped off his mask and breathed fire all over him. He died. Bane then put his mask back on before everyone else died as well)

    Bane: Get on board, Steve. Memedor awaits.

    Pinker: ass
    Heat
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Heat Mon Jun 01, 2015 3:19 pm

    <PAIN Base>

    GRANRT GUSTIN forwned. this wasnt supposed to go like this. GRANT GUSTIN exprected them to immedaitely accept his inteellectually superior leaderhsip. he wloud just have to convince them somehow.

    "oh yes" he said, tipping his fedora again "i shall prove i can... "bring the pain", as you prmitives say"

    he took off his fedora and som,ehow retrieved a camera-shaped object from within. he turned it on, and it immedaitely telported them somewhere else. a large billboard apprared in front of them

    Beyond Insanity Tumblr_m7n0c3HAEu1r9ovfeo1_1280

    "so then, so-called 'soldier'... alea jacta est!"

    (a subtitle then apprared, stating "THE DIE IS CAST")

    "DEFEnnd yourselVES!" GRANT GUSTIN screamed, as an army of FLOATING TROLLFACES appeared and triedb to bite the team (but not GRANT GUSTIN)
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Malygos Tue Jun 02, 2015 7:21 pm

    <FOKTown>

    As Bane drove off with his gang, the sight of a crime drew the look of a rather odd pair of individuals.

    Cue: Agent of Inquiry

    One was a rather large, most gentlemanly man, bearded and with exquisitely styled brown hair. He wore a dapper suit and a monocle to proclaim his gentlemanly manner to all who would gaze upon his manly visage. He struck a thoughtful, and grinned. "Well, Nashu, it seems that our mysterious killer has struck once again! Just like the others, charred and burned to a complete crisp!"

    "But, Hildibrand, we've been tracking this killer for a week, and there's been no sign of who he is or where he comes from!" His assistant, a small, bespectacled, grey-haired catgirl in pink, tilted her head. "Inspector, this one looks hard even for you!"

    Hildibrand simply smiled, striking a most gentlemanly pose. "Fear not! For Inspector Hildibrand Manderville, Agent of Enquiry, is on the case!"

    The narrator wishes them luck. Because people that stupid really need it.
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Klak Wed Jun 03, 2015 5:58 am

    <FOKtown>

    *CIA Agent Bill Wilson positions himself in his typical belt grabbing pose once he sees Hildibrand*

    CIA: "Detective, I'm CIA."

    ---

    <PAIN Base>

    *Soldier screams as the FLOATING TROLLFACES attack everyone. He shoots one with his shotgun and aims his bazooka at GRANT GUSTIN*

    *Painis Cupcake eats some of the FLOATING TROLLFACES, but OPM is taken down by them. Sing The Pain Sal throws a chair at GRANT GUSTIN and runs up to him*

    Sal: "Were you memeing, or funposting?!?!"

    Hide The Pain Harold: "Wait, he can join, but he has a lot to learn! You have a lot of competition, GUSTIN. Two guys over there want to be hired as well."

    *He points to two American celebrities sitting down. One wearing a suit whispers a joke to the other (who is wearing a red sweater) about the situation, and the red sweater man clutches his chest, laughing heartily*

    Bring The Pain Barry: "Alright, first thing we do is stop the big guy and Pinker, and rid the world of our wretched brother, Harold!"

    ---

    <Moon>

    *A moonling walks up to Moonman, who is playing his piano, smiling, and throwing his hands in the air*

    Moonling: "Uhh, SIR? He's turned into Boltetheus!"

    *Moonman frowns, then smiles*

    Moonman: "Here we go, let him come. This guy's gonna get REKT, son. Boltetheus or Boltman, either way, the Yellow Fellow will rue this day."
    JS
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by JS Mon Jun 08, 2015 11:02 pm

    < unown place >

    Sefer woke up, as visions of the Takemikazuchi Empire's fall at the hands of Boltman and the YONBOTs flooded her mind. Struggling against her restraints, she succeeded only in toppling over the chair she was tied to, with her and it crashing to the floor below.

    "what the fuck? where am i?"

    "Thought you'd escaped me, didn't you, you little bitch?" called out a man's voice from behind her. Sefer turned to get a better look at him, but felt the barrel of a Sturmgewehr 44 pressing into her back. "Keep your hands where I can see them, and no shapeshifting!"

    Sefer looked around. The basement was some kind of shrine, filled with more red flags than a fat girl's dating profile. The realization of her captor's identity shot through her in an instant; only one man could be this extreme.

    "Ben... Garrison."

    "My name is not important. What is important is what I'm going to do. I just fucking hate this meme world, and these memers feasting on its carcass. My whole life is just cold, bitter Hatred™, and I always wanted to die violently. This is the time for vengeance, and no life is worth saving. And I will put in a grave as many as I can. It's time for me to kill. And It's time for me to die."

    "huh."

    Ben drew a match and lit it, laughing. He lit the end of a fuse and walked out of the room, laughing even more. Sefer panicked as she followed the fuse across the room, to a large stack of dynamite. She struggled against her restraints, but the handcuffs were too tight. As it seemed like the end was nigh, a wave of motivational spirit surged through her body as a mysterious figure appeared before her.

    "DO IT! Just DO IT!"

    Realizing the solution to all her problems, she found the strength to break free of her restraints. She ran out of the room just as the dynamite exploded, and was blown clear of Ben Garrison's house by the resulting shockwave. She climbed to her feet. [BEN GARRISON WHOSE OTHER NICKNAME HAS BEEN CENSORED BY THE GRAND POOBAH] was nowhere to be seen. Sefer shrugged, and walked off.


    Last edited by Klak on Tue Jun 09, 2015 4:20 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : GRAND POOBAH STRIKES AGAIN)
    Heat
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Heat Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:23 pm

    <PAIN Base>

    "o, fear not..." GRANT GUSTIN hwispered in a most menacing fascion, as one of the FOLATING TROLLFACES flied up to the celbrities, and then EXPLODED! BOOM! Bomb

    "are there any other questions?" GRANT GUSTIN ressumed.

    -----

    <FOKTown>

    Hildibrand and his assistant suddenly heard a booming, yet kindly voice from behind them. "Excuse me, sir." It sounded like a nice old lady... if nice old ladies were 80 feet tall and threatened to cause earthquakes with their every move. They turned around to find a gigantic, 80-foot tall mechanical crab looking down at them, but not in a menacing way, but in a polite, friendly way.

    "Hello. I'm the Dark Mounted Crab, and I think I can help you."
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    Beyond Insanity Empty Re: Beyond Insanity

    Post by Zev the Reveler Fri Jul 24, 2015 3:22 am

    < In a Secret Base that is Totally Not in the Back of an Aftermarket Electronics Store >

    Shutters drawn on the back alley, door firmly locked and with an iron bar slid across the frame to fortify it, a mysterious figure - not exactly male or female, but certainly rather old - sighs as they set down their briefcase on the table. Also on the table is a McDonald's bag, and from the briefcase are retrieved certain 'artifacts' for the ritual to come.

    The Farouk of Foolery (pictured here) makes themselves ready, inserting the brautwurst into their left nostril and raising the electrical plug by their face with their right hand. Thus prepared, they begin to utter an incantation: "Arise, Boogston, Boogston arise. Arise, Boogston, Boogston arise." Spiraling fumes of delicious McDonald's smell arise from the bag set on the table, within which are a selection of offerings including a large McDonald's fries; 20 piece Chicken McNuggets; a McGriddle breakfast sandwich; a McRib; and three Chocolate Chip Cookies.

    Suddenly, the chocolate chip cookies float free of the bag, assuming triangle formation before they are consumed by some extradimensional force. Then, an ominously demonic magic circle of crackling magenta energy is stamped into the table, centered on the McDonald's bag! "Arise, Boogston! Boogston arise! Arise, Boogston! Boogston arise!" A two-dimensional plum purple triangle appears floating above the bag, surrounding by stylized tentacles of similar planar qualities with designs suggesting glowing magenta suckers, and glowing with its own Eldritch sigils in the corners. Then, the eye opens, with its glowing magenta sclera and plum purple slit pupil!

    I am the being known to your realms as Boogston, why have you summoned - ... Dammit it's you again. What do you want, loser? The Farouk explains, "Master, at last, I have gathered them into one place! Your Nine Aces! As the Great Old Books of Forbidden Knowledge from the back of the library foretold, the prophecies mascara-clad woeful gothics of the black and gray ink swamps are soon to come true!" The entity known as 'Boogston' was busy sucking chicken nuggets and fries out of the bag to eat, not really paying attention.

    Yeah, neat. Oh, McGriddle and a McRib, you spoil me. It finished its treats, and then looked with annoyed disinterest at the Farouk of Foolery. I shall go to my Nine Aces, spirit them away to bestow my eldritch blessings, and we shall then ride out of my moist and dank fortresses from beyond time. Upon this universe's afternoon of darkness, I shall make weak all that are strong, raze every fortified place, and take the last cookie to ever be in the cookie jar ever again. "And what of I, O' dark and terrible master?" The Farouk looked up hopefully.

    Your part to play in my plans has ended, Farouk of Foolery. The idea of you is too stupid to carry beyond your introduction. Thus eclipsing the Farouk of Foolery's existence with a blink, Boogston's now semi-3D tendrils grabbed the McRib and McGriddle out of the bag. Burning the bag into cinders with an eye laser, Boogston faded into an eldritch mist. Those aware of the higher orders of existential chicanery would be struck with a sensation of foreboding, of something wicked and also sicknasty approaching.

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