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    Kon
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    BZPB

    Post by Kon on Mon Dec 15, 2014 9:47 am

    OOS: New topic!

    ----------------------------------

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Ordak approaches Starscream tentatively, deciding to make sure he's unconscious by using his Sleep power on him*

    *The remaining Rahkshi sweep the debris from the battle to the side of the room, and then gather around Caiaphus and Blackout to watch their fight*

    -----

    *Kivalon is slammed against the wall, and the armour across his body begins to crumple*

    Kivalon: Argh... you are no ordinary Makuta... what are you?

    *Meanwhile Xikella spits plasma over the back of Bonecrusher's head, but is caught in his grip before she can jump off. Fortunately, Bonecrusher lets go too early, so instead of being thrown into the ground, she is thrown through the air and into OB's back*

    *SMK is about to stab Brawl with his sword, but he feels a wave of unease come over him, as if his own doubts about the success of the TrSBoM's mission are being amplified... so he takes a few steps back instead*

    *Starok, however, kicks Brawl in the chest, seemingly unaffected*

    Starok: You insult me with your attempt at scares. I have studied the Makuta race and our offspring for millennia. A Turahk's power does not create fear... it amplifies it. Even if the fear is locked away somewhere in your mind where even you cannot reach. I have no fear of you. I have survived the destruction of a hundred worlds, who's to say I won't survive a hundred more?

    ----------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    Seran: Good to have you on board, uh... cyber-guy-man! And I don't know, Leenkara, but it seems we are makings of progress!

    *A guard who looks a lot like Devin Townsend walks up to the metal bars of Seran's cell, activates his stunstick and drags it along them, which gives Seran a mild electric shock when he touches them*

    Seran: Ow! Son of a...

    Devin Lookalike: Stop clapping!

    Seran: I wasn't clappeeng...

    *DL walks away, humming a tune to himself*

    *The group spend the next few hours sitting in their cells doing nothing, until they hear a bell signifying that it's recreation hour, so their cell bars slide into the ceiling*

    Seran: Time to find the heavee.

    ----------------------------------

    <Hungry-man's ship>

    CIA: At least you can fight! Who are you?

    *The hothead doesn't reply, choosing instead to climb in the driver's seat of the jeep, start the engine, and drive round running over joke characters*

    CIA: No! This can't be happening! I'm in charge here!

    Foley: Someone get this hothead outta here!

    *He pulls out an assault rifle and fires it at the jeep, but he is then hit by it, rolling over the bonnet and collapsing on the floor*

    *CIA grabs one of the guards of the plane, Juan Avyu, and speaks to him*

    CIA: Juan, find out who's flying this thing and tell them to stop! We have an emergency down here! Bring backup and big guys!

    Juan: Yes sir!

    *He runs across the garage, eventually coming to the gigantic door which connects it to the main area of the ship. He crawls underneath it and disappears*

    *Baneman runs at the janitors and hotheads, and breaks the nose of one of them with a punch. Despite this heroism, he is shot, and CIA runs over, shooting the hothead and kneeling down at Baneman's side*

    Baneman: CIA, I.... I....

    CIA: Don't you die on me!

    Baneman: There's a big guy out there... a big guy for you... but... but... you're not allowed to meet...

    CIA: Stay with me!

    *Baneman succumbs to his gunshot wound, causing CIA to cry to the ceiling in anguish*

    *The battle continues, but everyone is knocked off their feet shortly after as the ship jumps to lightspeed*

    CIA: What's going on?!

    Smee: SIR, we didn't file this flight plan!

    CIA: But I sent Juan to stop the ship!

    Smee: I know, SIR!

    CIA: ...of course... Juan Avyu was actually... Juan Avem... we've been betrayed!

    *Alarms blare, and Hungry-man's ship tilts to the side. The joke characters, big guys, janitors, hotheads, and vehicles roll across the floor towards the wall*

    *CIA hits the wall, and finds himself next to a hothead*

    CIA: Well congratulations, you got the ship to jump to lightspeed! Now what's the next step of your master plan?!

    Hothead: Crashing this ship... WITH NO SURVIVORS

    *The hothead takes out a grenade, removes the pin and throws it at CIA, but he kicks it back at the hothead. The hothead explodes but so does the section of the wall he was leaning against*

    *CIA crawls over to the hole and looks out of it. To his horror, he sees that they are no longer in space, but above the clouds of an alien world, falling towards the surface*

    Smee: SIR, we're going down!

    CIA: Just where in the hell are we?

    Smee: I don't know SIR, but I see... memes! Everywhere! It's like some kind of... Meme World!

    ----------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Kakamu shakes D-Klak's hand, and nods at Lalli*

    Kakamu: You too, Mr. Cain.

    *Quolas turns to Klak*

    Quolas: You're right. We should leave as soon as possible. Are we all ready?

    Kakamu: Well, Muta still needs repairing so some of us are going to have to stay here.

    Etende: I can do that!

    *Masaharu sits down against the ship, trying to catch his breath*

    Micros: Yeah, I think me and Masa need to rest for a while. I dunno how much sleep you guys get, but whatever it is, it ain't healthy!

    Kakamu: I'll go with you, Quolas. Anyone else?


    Last edited by Kon on Sun Mar 05, 2017 7:38 am; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Wed Dec 17, 2014 4:25 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    Blackout: Unite? Don't make me laugh. You have nothing to offer me. You have no vision, no goal in your life! You've allied yourself with a bunch of cowards who fled when the war against the Vrai got too much for them and still think it somehow makes them superior!

    *His hands glow with Nox energy*


    *Starscream falls asleep, and starts dreaming about Batman*


    OB: I'm a Blackout, mate!

    *He twirls away, so Xikella doesn't crash into him*

    *He fires a wave of shadow energy at Kivalon*


    *Bonecrusher screams in pain*

    *He activates his power of Fire Resistance, but the damage is already done, and what's left of his head falls off*


    *Brawl stumbles back, smiling*

    Brawl: I'm to say.

    *He shoots two lightning bolts at Starok*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Ynot: Yes, obviously. And stop him doing..... whatever it is he's going to do.

    *Crickets chirp*

    Ynot: Anyone know how we could find him?

    TPK: Don't you have any contacts?

    Ynot: Well..... There is one.

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: It's..... nothing. Jones messed it up.

    *She focuses, and her face slowly returns to normal*

    Aster: I guess we're both lost now. Where are you off to?

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    SB: I know! I could teleport us all back home before the bomb goes off..... except Blackout took my teleportation power away. Damn it. Can anyone else here teleport?

    -----

    <Saskana>

    Von Budberg: A great vhizzard. And yet I, a former General of the Dominion, have heard nothing of you. Odd.

    *He shrugs*

    Von Budberg: Ah well, who says I have to know of all vhizzards, eh? Come with me, Masskertis!

    *He gets into a ship which is not unlike a Republic gunship*

    ---

    *Perseus and Strika's 'ship' arrives near Saskana*

    Strika: The subspace trail stops here. This must be the place.

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    *F-Blackout puts his arm around Akzer and laughs*

    F-Blackout: Haha, nice one! Say, can I meet this..... Ozar?


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Wed Dec 17, 2014 3:37 pm

    <Supermax 282>

    *The critics get out of their cells and walk to the place Heavy told them to meet at*

    *Paul Latza sees Heavy from behind, and immediately assumes he is Joss Whedon. He smiles until Heavy turns around*

    *Dr. Bedge signs a few autographs before joining them*

    *JC Denton follows Seran closely, as though he is actively stalking the Jedi*

    JC Denton: "Forgive me. My eyes are augmented."

    *Agent 47 scowls at his prison cell*

    Agent 47: "“My client has asked me to ensure that this is the last prisoner you will see.”

    Prison Cell: "Yesss...."

    ---

    <Hungry-man's ship>

    TTT: "memes?!"

    CIA Guy: "The flight plan didn't include this!"

    FAAAKING Cupcake: "I sense MAAAARAAAASMAAAAAS!"

    Patrick Bateman: "It looks like I'm back to this place again."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    D-Klak: "I'm with you, Quolas."

    Nadle: "Aye."

    Bob: "Me three!"

    Lalli: "I'd rather stay."

    Me: I'll stay as well. Best of luck. If you need us, you know how to reach us.

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    Caiaphus: "I have a vision! I see the folly of all this, the same folly you saw four short years ago, when Pandorica opened! I am here to put an end to it, by any means necessary. Universal conquest is merely a step in that goal. And there you are, still droning on about the Vrai War! Can't you see, Blackout? This universe has moved on from the wars of the past to the war of the future! Look around you, and you will see the future of our race, the next step in our evolution. Or.....*he smiles* Perhaps your place in this is not at my side! Do not worry! You will be an agent of chaos yet. If you survive our battle, that is. But enough of our banter! Down you go!"

    *He charges at Blackout and swings the axe towards his head*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Figlio: "Excellent. Contact this individual quickly. Mazkertis intends to rewrite the very fabric of time, which means you'll all lose the Uterio War."

    Coro: "We'll see about that. How do we find your friend, Ynot?"

    D-Klak (4): "Uterio War?"

    Axalara: "We'll explain later."

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "No idea...the government, ZFT, and Cadmus are all after me, and Malygos might just invade. I guess all we can do is hide and wait it out, eh? Unless Maly shows up. I'll fight him if he does."

    *Rainn laughs*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    Anarky: "No."

    Julio: "Nope."

    Rahn: "I can, I think!"

    Anarky: "You think? That's not good enough."

    Rahn: "Well, I'm 99.9% sure I can!"

    Anarky: "Good enough. Let's go!"

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Mazkertis: (tp) "I am not of your universe."

    *Mazkertis gets into the ship*

    --

    Perseus: "Alright, we'll interrogate as many officials as we can until we find him."

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    Akzer: "I'm not sure where he is."

    Fourteen: "WHAT THE BLOODY HELL JUST HAPPENED HERE?"

    *He is peering through the hole in the wall*

    Akzer: "Oh, Fourteen, we were just having fun."

    Fourteen: "Oh no. Why did I even bother coming here? I thought I would run into you again, Akzer. An' who's that?"

    Akzer: "This is...er.....Von Ness. He's an old friend."

    Fourteen: "Is he a cop?"

    Akzer: "No."

    Fourteen: "Well, hello then, Von Ness."


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    Kon
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Wed Dec 17, 2014 8:43 pm

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Ordak nudges Starscream with his foot, shrugs, picks him up, and puts him in the computer room nearby. On his way out, he presses a stone button on the exterior wall, and the brick door slams shut*

    -----

    *The lightning crashes against Starok's sword, and he struggles to hold it up*

    *Kivalon's chest armour buckles against the wave of shadow energy and a large gash is ripped in it, causing antidermis to leak out*

    *Xikella lands in front of her brother and fires purple fragmentation blasts at OB*

    ------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Seran, Mortimer, Dr. Bedge, Latza, JC, Spanha and Agent 47 all take a look around them. They are in a spacious supply closet adjacent to the mess hall. Heavy is sitting on some crates in front of them*

    Heavy: Is everyone here?

    Mortimer: I think so... wait... where's Spoony?

    *Part of the roof above them suddenly caves in, causing debris to rain down on them. Dr. Bedge screams*

    Seran: Stand back!

    *The critics and other characters jump backwards, and Spoony lands where they were. He stands up, twists his neck, crosses his arms and gives a triumphant pose. The door to the mess hall behind him opens and Doug and Linkara enter the closet, following suit*

    Linkara: Starting the meeting without us, HMMMMMM?

    Mortimer: Ah, it's about time you showed up! Sit down, lad.

    *Doug closes the door behind him, but it is then kicked open by security guards who light up their stunsticks*

    Guard: What are you doing in here? This area is off-limits!

    Seran: We were, uhh...

    *He waves his fingers in front of them*

    Seran: Thees supply closet ees boring. There ees nobody here, and the hole een the roof needs to be patched up later.

    Guard: This supply closet is boring. Nobody here. Hole needs patching. Gotcha!

    *The guards leave the room, looking confused. Heavy grabs a lead pipe and jams the door with it*

    Heavy: NOW are we all here?

    Linkara: Get on with it, for crying out loud! I only have a limited amount of screentime!

    Heavy: As you wish.

    *He stands up and points to the crate he was sitting on. To the group's surprise, it is labeled "60 Aperture Science Brand Combustible Lemons"*

    *Mortimer punches a hole in another crate to discover that it is full of unused stunsticks*

    Heavy: Hrm. Good, you found the weapons. They will be important part of the plan, which is as follows. You know where kitchen is?

    Spanha: The one at the other end of the hall? Yep.

    Heavy: Behind the kitchen is another door which leads to corridor, which leads to docking station. It is where the trash from the kitchen is taken to be hauled off to a dumping ground. Soon, when it is time for us to return to our cells, the rest of the security guards will realize that we are missing. They will search this entire level, and will likely put the place on lockdown. That is why we need to act fast, like bullet from expensive minigun. When the other prisoners are being escorted back to their cells, we will need to leave this closet and make our way across the mess hall to the kitchen without being seen. Once that is complete, we will take the trashbags out of the trashcans, and hide in them ourselves. Some workers will then load the trashcans onto a cart, which will be taken to a docking bay. We will then be loaded onto a ship. When the time is right, we will break out of our cans and through into the cockpit, where we will beat the tiny baby man driving it. Understood?

    Seran: I might be able to deestract the security guards from noticeeng us when we are makeengs our way across the hall, with the mageeck of the Force!

    Mortimer: That's all well and good, but aren't the workers going to notice that the trashbags are no longer in the bins?

    *Spanha's lip-tentacles move up and down*

    Spanha: Leave that to me! I haven't had a proper meal in a while.

    Seran: That ees gross. But useful... but steell gross.

    *A bell rings, and Heavy smiles*

    Heavy: Are you ready, cowards?

    *Dr. Bedge dabs the sweat off his forehead with a towel*

    ------------------------

    <Hungry-man's ship>

    *Smee takes out his tablet, and uses it to view the ship's controls. He sees that the engines have failed, and that someone is trying to override the garage door controls*

    Smee: Someone's trying to override the door controls, SIR!

    CIA: That can't happen! I'm in charge here! If that door is overridden, tens of people could fall to their doom!

    *As the ship tilts even more to the side, the jeep that the hotheads arrived in rolls over and smashes through the wall, creating a large hole*

    Maimen: Grab on to something!!!

    *The hole in the wall widens as it begins to break apart, and a couple of unnamed joke characters are sucked through it*

    *Patrick Bateman stabs his axe into the floor and holds on for dear life. Car Guard and TTT grab his legs, and Harold and CIA grab their legs*

    *As the ship falls ever closer to the rich green surface of Meme World, and CIA sees that he's pulling Car Guard's trousers down in a desperate attempt to stay on the ship, he realizes what has to be done. His parents back on Earth, FBI and NSA, always told him that he was a big guy, but he never really believed it... until now. Why would someone cling onto a man before falling out of a giant falling log cabin, he asks himself? Because CIA IS a big guy, for us, for them, and for himself. He knows that he is big enough to survive a fall like this... but he just doesn't want to let go. Taking a deep breath, he pokes Car Guard's bare leg to get his attention*

    Car Guard: What is it, CIA?

    CIA: You're a big guy.

    *Car Guard looks down at CIA... and sees a single tear fall from his eye. CIA didn't mean big in stature, but in spirit. Car Guard then realizes what CIA is about to do, and opens his mouth in an attempt to talk him out of it, but it is already too late. Before his eyes, CIA lets go of his leg, and firmly grabs his own belt with his hands instead. He is instantly sucked through the gaping hole in the wall of the ship, and disappears from view*

    Car Guard: NOOOOOO!!

    TTT: braice for impact !!

    *There is a deafening crunching sound and the joke characters are thrown into the air. The lights of the garage are shut off as the ship's power fails, and the walls collapse in on themselves. The joke characters hit the floor a few moments later, winded but alive. Crawling over the remains of the garage, they look out to the world beyond them. They are now on Meme World... but at what cost?*

    ------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Quolas: Splendid. This shouldn't take too long.

    *He draws his sword, and, chanting an ancient spell, slices the space in front of him. The cut in reality bends open at the sides, allowing them to step through. Assuming they do, Quolas, D-Klak, Nadle, Kakamu and Bob find themselves in one of the ancient stone corridors of Quolas' fortress. He turns back to seal the spacial tear behind him*

    Kakamu: Alright. Which way to the artefacts?

    Quolas: It should be...

    *He turns around, and a flaming arrow immediately pins his hood to the wall behind him and sets his robe abaze*

    Kakamu: Quolas!

    Quolas: Argh! Herko fama pe gallo pekka nu!

    *He rips his robes off, throws them to the ground and douses the fire with ice energy conjured from his fingertips. For the first time, the others see his true appearance beneath the robes. He is muscular, yet wrinkled, and his torso is decorated with the same white symbols that his face and hands are. His skin remains a pale shade of blue, and his chest glows with a white energy, covered by several sets of what can only be described as pincers*

    *Kakamu shapeshifts a sword from his body and holds it towards the dark end of the corridor where the arrow came from*

    Kakamu: Show yourself!

    *Several humans step out of the darkness with more flaming arrows aimed at them, dressed in basic, brown attire. Their leader steps forward and lowers his*

    ???: Well, good on you for asking... but I don't like your tone. Who... or what are you?


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Thu Dec 18, 2014 5:34 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    Blackout: Causing chaos is pointless unless it serves a greater purpose. How can you still not realise that after so long?

    *He ducks, evading the axe, and hugs Caiaphus*

    *His hands are still glowing with Nox energy, and Caiaphus can feel his armour burning*


    *When Ordak turns around, he suddenly finds Barricade and Xintrix in front of him*

    Barricade: Hey there.

    *He suddenly throws a punch at Ordak*

    ---

    *Brawl follows the lightning up with a sudden blast of heat vision*


    *OB laughs at Kivalon's defeat, but one of Xikella's fragmentation blasts hits OB on the shoulder, and his arm explodes*

    *Another blast hits the floor beneath him, and the resulting explosion sends him flying across the room*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Ynot: Easy. I just need to make one call.

    *He sends a telepathic message to Trixitin, who promptly sets off to talk to Aran-dur*

    *An hour later, Trixitin returns, and he teleports down to the surface to meet them*

    TPK: Is this your source?

    Trixitin: No, I'm one of Ynot's friends. He sent me to talk to the actual source.

    Ynot: And? What'd she say?

    Trixitin: Your guy's on Saskana. It used to be part of the Dominion, but after Malygos disappeared they declared independence. Apparently he's a guest of the local authorities.

    TPK: A guest? They must be either fools..... or villains.

    Ynot: Saskana it is, then. Gentlemen, I offer you my ship. It is sturdy, and likely far more powerful than any of yours.

    TPK: Don't remind me.

    Ynot: *turns to Trixitin* Go back up to the Cabana, and tell the Toa to go to Shinobi-Nui.

    Trixitin: You know, they'll want to be part of this.

    Ynot: I know, but I don't want them to be part of this.

    *Trixitin nods, and teleports back to the Cabana*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: Hide? Hm..... I think I know someone who'll hide us. It's a long shot, but if we can convince him, he might be able to ship us off somewhere safe.

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    SB: Okay then.

    *SB revs the engine, and then drives towards the gate*

    SB: YEE-HAW!

    *The car crashes through the gate, and then keeps going*

    553: We're all gonna die.

    *553 closes his eyes*

    ----

    <Saskana>

    *The gunship flies off*

    ---

    Strika: Surely there's an easier way? Can't we scan for magic energy or something?

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    F-Blackout: Er, yes, Von Ness, yes.

    *He shakes Fourteen's hand*

    F-Blackout: So, Fourteen, is it? That's not much of a name. Do you work for Ozar too?

    -----


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    Kon
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Fri Dec 19, 2014 3:18 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Ordak's mask is rammed further into his face, and he stumbles back, grabbing it*

    Ordak: Aghh... where do you keep coming from?!

    *He clicks his fingers to gain the attention of the remaining Rahkshi nearby, and points at Barricade and Xintrix*

    *The small crowd of Rahkshi charge into them, allowing him to run away*

    -----

    *Starok's sword is blasted out of his grip, so he charges his fists with Shattering power and takes a swing at Brawl*

    *Xikella observes her surroundings instead of going after OB, and sees SMK standing at the end of the room, doing nothing*

    Xikella: Coward!

    *She runs over to Kivalon, and examines his injuries. His armour is battered, and part of his mask missing*

    Xikella: Brother, can you hear me?

    *He gives a quiet moan, so she picks him up and backs up, smashing the lock on the door with her elbow*

    Xikella: Buy us time, Kakamu, or so help me your gaseous form will be but condensation on the window of your enemy... and your enemy will be me. Ptha!

    *She leaves the room*

    --------------------------------

    <An asteroid field in the Linkit system>

    *Not too far away from the barren planet Linkit, a sheet of asteroids of varying sizes float peacefully through the blackness of space, as they have done for a very long time. That peace has now been interrupted, however, by a silver escape pod smashing through them like a game of Breakout, its occupant clinging on for dear life*

    Kulnak: AAAAHHHHHHHH

    *After some time, the escape pod collides with an asteroid larger than all the others, but instead of ricocheting off it, it sticks to like a magnet*

    Kulnak: AAAAHHHH- huh?

    *He kicks the escape pod's hatch open and pokes his head out, observing his surroundings*

    Kulnak: ...Weird.

    *He crawls out onto the asteroid and starts to explore its surface. Using his own Kraata power of magnetism, he discovers that the asteroid is actually magnetic*

    Kulnak: Very weird.

    *After a few minutes of crawling across the asteroid, he discovers a crater with a large hole at the bottom, so he slides down it and jumps in*

    *He lands on a metal surface, with his heavy feet making dents in the floor where he landed. He stands up and looks around him - to his surprise, he seems to be in some sort of communications center, with computers sat upon desks, plugged into the walls of the room. He walks over to one of the desks and picks up a small metal object with a keypad. He presses one of the keys, and the screen lights up with this symbol and the words "Enter password"*

    Kulnak: Huh.

    *He puts the EyePhone safely in a gap in his armour, and jumps in shock upon hearing a cackling sound behind him*

    ???: Hehehahaheh... I knew we would meet again, my old apprentice...

    *He turns around to face the source of the voice, and sees a wizened, grey-skinned figure approach him*

    ???: ...But I was not expecting you back so soon.

    Kulnak: SHEEV? No... that's not possible! You're dead!

    Sheev: So I would have had you believe. War is coming, Kulnak, and I intend to be on the winning side. Join me, Kulnak, and live up to the potential you always had... or face the true power of the Dark Side of the Force!

    Kulnak: You're... pure sheevil! I'll never join you!

    *Sheev's smile sheevleaves him, and is replaced by a menacing grimace*

    Sheev: So be it... AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHAARHGHGHLGHLAHRLHLGHGL

    *He activates his lightsaber and flies forward in a circular motion*

    --------------------------------

    <Atuar Sadiares>

    *A space taxi pulls into one of Atuar Sadiares' many docking bays, and Kranxx steps out*

    Kranxx: Thank you, human!

    Taxi driver: That'll be 4,424,986,605 credits please.

    Kranxx: ...

    *He runs away*

    Taxi driver: Hey, get back here!

    *Kranxx makes it inside the corridor leading to the main complex, but trips over a leg that someone has stuck out from inside a crowd*

    Kranxx: Oof.

    *The leg retracts, and Kek steps out to take its place*

    Kek: Woah. Hey Lel, check it out! A real life quasimorph!

    Kranxx: Wha?

    *Lel walks up to them, and puts both hands to his mouth in a shocked expression*

    Lel: OOOOOOHHHH.

    *The taxi driver enters the area, grabs Kranxx by the headtacles, and lifts him up*

    Taxi driver: You owe me some money.

    Lel: Ooh, ooh, we'll pay you for him!

    Taxi driver: Wait, what? You know this thing?

    Kek: Nah, but I've always wanted a pet quasimorph. Did you know that they can survive almost solely on flies and cheese?

    Taxi driver: Listen buddy, I don't think you can pay off his debt.

    Lel: How much?

    Taxi driver: 4,424,986,605 credits.

    *There is an awkward pause, after which Kek punches him in the face. Lel grabs Kranxx when the driver's grip is loosened, and the two Terugans run away with Kranxx in tow*

    --------------------------------

    <Meme World>

    Yon, BONES, See-Man and Shrek cheered upon witnessing the arrival of new f***ing memes.

    See-Man pointed at the new memes with his giant finger, smiling with glee. "SEE!" He shouted over the sound of Harkinian's D1NN3R blaster, the energy of which was already plowing its way into the bat's underbelly.

    Yon also took the opportunity to lift up Jesse Ventura's minigun, spin it up and pump the front of the bat full of lead. "The Day of Dong is far from over!" The one-eyed wonder called across the vast underground cavern. Wiseau's bat shrieked in pain and began to withdraw from the battle to gain time to heal itself. "Don't let it get away!"

    The bat flapped its bullet-shredded wings in an attempt to fly up through the ceiling, but it was futile. Instead, it turned around and began to crawl up the volcano behind it.

    "What are you doing, batty? Haha, you're so batty, batty." Wiseau said lightheartedly, as if the deteriorating health of his pet monster was of no concern to him. Eventually, the bat reached the top of the volcano, teetering on the edge. It was at this time when an immense light from within the volcano began to shine through the cracks of the rock around it, pulsating with an ancient power.

    "And what in God's name might that be?" Shrek asked his comrades.

    Yon shook his head in bewilderment. Only once in his life had he seen a light like that, and they had called it the Keruvim. After gazing upon its beauty, he had tried to take it for himself, but he was defeated. Surely this can't be the same thing, he thought? The Keruvim was back in his galaxy the last time he checked, hundreds of light years away from Meme World.

    The Terugan then heard a shuffling noise next to him, so he turned his head to see what it was. It was Tiny, brushing his way past the unconscious bodies of the rest of the Dongers, supporting himself with his bazooka.

    "Tiny! You're from around here. Do you have any idea what that light is?" Yon asked the dwarf. Following his gaze, Tiny looked at base of the volcano, towards the light... and his eyes shone with excitement.

    "wow mister..... are you serious? theres only 1 thing that light can be... the dedo..."

    "What?"

    "The de... dedo... DEDOTATED WAM!!!"

    Unable to contain his ecstasy, Tiny shot off towards the volcano, bazooka in hand. Tommy Wiseau looked back and saw the dwarf headed for a collision course, so he frowned and raised his hand.

    "Stahp now, little man!" Tommy shouted, but Tiny was beyond caring about anything Wiseau had to say. He had to get to the dedotated wam before Wiseau... or his bat... did. Unfortunately, it seems that his opponent was thinking exactly the same but in reverse. The Mask-wearing man chuckled, hopped off his bat, and went straight into the volcano.

    "NOOOOO!!" Tiny screamed, and lifted up his bazooka. If he was quick enough... maybe he could stop him before he reached the bottom. In epic slow-motion, he pulled the trigger and the barrel of the bazooka exploded outwards as the rocket was shot forth. It hit the volcano, tunneled through to its core... and with an almighty boom, it exploded, and an ash-covered Wiseau was thrown out by the blast and onto the floor. The volcano crumbles, burying Tommy in rocks as he rolls down its side, and revealing the glorious Dedotated Wam in its true form inside the volcano. Tiny threw away his bazooka and leaped forward across the rocky floor, climbing over Tommy and grabbing the Wam in his own two hands. His eyes rolled back and a smile spread across his face as he finally achieved his one purpose in life. He was at peace.

    However, what is left of Wiseau's bat was not. While Tiny was distracted, it crawled over the rocks, screeched, and shut its teeth over Tiny's head. He screamed and punched it in the eyes, causing it to open its mouth to roar in pain. Tiny backed away and held the Wam to his chest as he stared down the beast. He began to recite a poem.

    "even tho i walk thru the valley of the shadow of death, i fear no evil, for u are with me; ur high-res graphics and superiore textures, they comfort me. u run minecraft at extra-fast speed and kill all zombie villagers. the wam will follow me all the days of my life, and i will dwell in my birch wood house forever in the basement next to my nether portel. amen"

    He smiled as he knew what had to be done. The weapons of the Dongers were powerful, and had succeeded in delaying the beast long enough for him to get to the Wam. But killing it was another story. A story that Tiny was sure that he would type up on fanfiction.net in the afterlife... but as for now... his time here was ogre. The jaws of the beast opened up and shot towards him, and he welcomed them, holding the wam up and forcing it down its throat. Tiny was crunched in the bat's jaws, but it could not swallow him. It began to choke and panic as it gasped for air, but none came. It stumbled around, jumped up and down in desperation, but nothing would dislodge the Wam stuck in its throat. Something of Tiny must have survived, because the shadow of a hand could be seen inside the bat's throat still holding the Wam, stroking it gently as its light grew brighter. After a few moments of tearful suspense, it gave a thumbs-up, and the Wam exploded. The bat shrieked as it was blasted apart from within, sending chunks of meat raining down on the unconscious Dongers.

    "No..." Yon whispered, and ran over to what was left of the bat. Sure enough, there was no trace of Tiny... but somehow, incredibly, the Wam was still there, and it was still intact.

    "How the hell is this possible, lad?!" Shrek spluttered upon seeing the Wam in its true form. "Ah saw that thing explode like mah onionade soup!"

    "It didn't explode," Yon said, "Tiny just released some of its energy, possibly with a touch. He sacrificed himself to save us from the bat."

    BONES brushed some bat-skin off his suit, and shook his skeletal head. "Ah, that's a shame, but it's good to know that not all of the Wam was dedotated. Lord Zrintch would send me to hell if he knew that an incredible power source was here, and we missed the opportunity to bring it back."

    "Of course... bring it back!" Yon smiled. "We can use it to power your ship!"

    LeTrole Ruseman Trollface : Your ship sucks!

    "Bad bait, mate." Shrek said.

    BONES nodded. "Alright Yon, good idea. I'll take it back to the ship. After seeing what fleshy hands did to it, this might be more in my area of expertise."

    He walked over towards the Wam, but felt the rocky ground rumbling beneath him halfway there. Suddenly, Tommy Wiseau burst out, the Mask still firmly on his face, and still looking very much alive.

    "Where do you think you're going, mudderfugger?" He jeered. "I'll kill you! I'll kill you all!"

    OOS: Dun dun duuun.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Sun Dec 21, 2014 8:10 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus bellows as the Nox energy burns his armor*

    Caiaphus: "Chaos....is...agh....pointless! That....is...agh...the point!"

    *He faces Blackout and emits a power scream. His arms raise up and shoot out a sonic blast at the stalactites above. The rocky structures collapse and fall....*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Axalara: "And we're off!"

    *Coro stands next to Figlio and whispers into his ear*

    Coro: "I know what you did to Angonce."

    *Figlio smiles and whispers back*

    Figlio: "If it were Heremus in there, you would have done the same thing."

    *Coro's eyes widen, and he looks away*

    *The Knights of the Keruvim follow Ynot. Figlio seems to lag behind.*

    Coro: "....Let's get moving."

    Figlio: "Red sun."

    Coro: "I'm sorry?"

    Figlio: "Red sun."

    *Coro suddenly collapses and starts holding his head in pain. His blue eyes start turning red*

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "Who?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Lalli And Klak's location>

    *Lalli seems to be browsing Space Twitter*

    Lalli: "Huh. Another prison escape. You people need to get better restraining systems."

    Me: I'm sorry?

    Lalli: "There was a riot at Fairfax Maximum Security, and a few suspected terrorists escaped. They're the ones who have been a nuisance to your planet for the past year. Apparently, they've only killed a few people."

    Me: *annoyed* What are their names?

    Lalli: "Rahn, Anarky, and 553 are the only ones that were captured."

    *Klak growls*

    Me: MASAHARU, WATCH THEM.

    *He flies into the air and rockets away at extreme speeds*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *The car crashes into the lounge just as someone shouts 'Bingo'!*

    *Anarky jumps out and smiles*

    Anarky: "Congratulations, you won the game! We're here with your prize! I promise it's going to be a blast."

    *Anarky laughs. The bingo players all start panicking and evacuate the building. The older members cannot run away as fast*

    *Anarky runs out with Julio*

    Rahn: "Let's go! I'll blow it up once we're at a safe distance! This i-"

    *His eyes widen*

    Rahn: "Did you just feel that, Shadow Blade?"

    *The sound of a jet flying at extreme speeds gets closer. A booming noise rips through the windows of the lounge and the surrounding buildings, and a crashing sound reverberates throughout the neighborhood.*

    *Police sirens are heard in the distance. A black and white being slowly walks towards the lounge*

    Rahn: *runs out* "Is that...?"

    Klak: WHERE. IS. HE?

    OOS: dun dun dun!

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Perseus: "Well, do you have anything that does that?"

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    Fourteen: "You don't want to know how I got the name, mate. And yes, I work for Lord Ozar. Why do you ask?"

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    Doug: "That is crazy enough to work, Heavy. Unlike a Michael Bay movie, am I right?"

    *Linkara, Paul Latza, Spoony laugh in the most exaggerated manner. JC Denton does not laugh, and neither do Dr. Bedge and Heavy*

    Heavy: "Is not funny!"

    *Everyone gets ready*

    Paul Latza: "Let's do this!"

    ---

    <Hungry-man's ship>

    TTT: "i think we los some frends"

    Patrick Bateman: "I could have gotten us a table at Dorsia, and we would have avoided this."

    Hungry-Man: "sounds like a good place, ah'm so bloody hungry"

    Car Guard: "Actually, the crash is the key to all this."

    John Freeman: "it is destiny of all joek characters to survive crash and save universe!"

    *Harold is busy trying to get out of the wreckage with Franz and James. They hope to find Carrots and the other joke characters*

    *Rog Rogerson is describing the scene to a cameraman.*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *D-Klak points his gunblade at the human*

    D-Klak: "You first."

    *Nadle lowers D-Klak's gun*

    Nadle: "What my friend meant to say was that we are assisting the owner of this establishment. His name is Quolas."

    *Nadle points at Quolas, then at himself*

    Nadle: "I am Nadle."

    *He points to each person in the crew to introduce them*

    Nadle: "Now, who are you, and why are you here?"

    OOS: I hope I'm not missing anyone.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Sun Dec 21, 2014 5:37 pm

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Masaharu cricks his claws and leans against the ship*

    Micros: Wait, what just happened?

    *Etende pokes her head out of the cockpit*

    Etende: Hey, Lalli, do you have a toolbox I could use?

    --------------------------------

    <An asteroid field in the Linkit system>

    Kulnak: AAAHHHHH!

    *He jumps back, but Sheev's lightsaber cuts through his shoulder, causing blood to rush forth*

    Kulnak: Argh...

    *He falls over, and Sheev cackles. He raises his lightsaber for a killing blow, but Kulnak raises his hand*

    Kulnak: Stop! At least... before I die... what is this place?

    Sheev: And for what reason should I grant you this mercy?

    Kulnak: You owe me. Remember when the janitors of Tievie discovered your location and ambushed you at the catalog?

    Sheev: Hm. Very well, Kulnak, you have earned one more minute of life. I was brought here by a distress signal, which contained some... personal information about myself. I have spent the past few hours decoding it... and I have discovered that this place was not built in our universe.

    Kulnak: So what, this is some kind of bizarro-asteroid?

    Sheev: It's a space ship disguised as an asteroid, you fool. Look around you! Could that not be more obvious?

    Kulnak: Uh...

    Sheev: Prepare to die.

    Kulnak: Hold up a sec! Is there any more of the transmission that needs decoding?

    Sheev: There are some security measures in place that I cannot decrypt, yes. But I doubt you could do any better.

    Kulnak: I am the ultimate threat to your security.

    *Sheev deactivates his lightsaber*

    Sheev: Go, before I change my mind.

    *Kulnak runs over to the nearest computer, pushes its swivel-chair aside, and starts typing on it*

    Computer: Welcome, Yon.

    Kulnak: Yon? Who the hell is Yon?

    *He gets into the desktop and starts peeking around in the documents*

    Kulnak: Ooh, you naughty boy.

    *Meanwhile, Sheev puts on a breathing mask and runs down a corridor*

    Kulnak: Ah! There it is.

    *He finds a program called "distressignal.exe" and tries to edit it. A password prompt comes up*

    Kulnak: Huh.

    *He enters "yourmum69" as a guess, and suddenly an alarm blares, and the room shakes*

    Computer: Warning. Unauthorized access detected. Ship will self-destruct in 30 seconds.

    *Kulnak screams and runs down the corridor. He comes to an airlock, looks through the window, and sees Sheev leeve in this ship, a Lambda-class shuttle*

    Kulnak: Ah, piss.

    *The shuttle turns around and fires at the airlock, which destroys it completely, and throws Kulnak against the wall of the steel corridor*

    *It continues firing, and Kulnak's armour is blasted apart by the lasers, leaving only his antidermis. On Sheev's ship, the Sith Lord cackles*

    Sheev: Ready torpedos. Blow it straight to hell!

    Imperial officer: Yes sir.

    *However, before the shuttle's torpedos can be launched, a figure clad in thick black armour materializes in the asteroid-ship's hallway, next to Kulnak's antidermis*

    Sheev: Eh?

    *The figure takes a small silver canister from his belt and opens the lid. Kulnak's antidermis is sucked inside. The figure screws the lid back on and then disappears*

    Sheev: ...curse that stranger. Captain, turn this ship around. Let's get back to base.

    *The shuttle turns around, but is caught in the shockwave of the asteroid-ship's detonation. It is thrown towards Linkit, and as the engines fail, it spirals towards its surface*

    --------------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    *A maskless and fragile Toa of Water is strapped to a table in a dark room. She struggles against her bonds, but she feels as if something nearby is draining her energy, making her weak*

    *The door of the room opens and light pours in, revealing the metal walls stained with blood. The silhouette of a tall, armour-clad figure stands in the doorway for a moment, looking over his prisoner, before stepping in*

    ???: Who are you?! Let me go!

    *The captor walks over to the left of the table and light shines on his mask, making it visible. The prisoner recognizes it after staring for a moment, and fights off the panic that comes with that realization*

    ???: You... why... how did you find me...?!

    ???: Nobody is unreachable, Helryx. You cannot run from the shadow, no matter how much light you bathe yourself in... you and your little order.

    Helryx: Kakamu... please... you can't DO this! One universe is terrible enough! Just let me go!

    Dukamu: Why would I do that?

    Helryx: I understand you want a fresh start. But perhaps I can still help you. Just come with me back to Daxia and-

    Dukamu: You know NOTHING of me, woman!

    *Dukamu electrocutes her with chain lightning, causing her to spasm and scream*

    Dukamu: It's too late... for all of us.

    *After his attack, he gestures to one of the guards outside the room, who hands Dukamu a metal box*

    Helryx: Why...

    *Dukamu opens it, takes out a variety of instruments, and lays them out on the table next to her. They are a glass tube filled with lava, a thermometer, and a small bag of sand*

    Dukamu: It pains me to do this.. really, it does. But this is the price you must pay for betraying me.

    *The door closes, and the guards outside wince at the sounds coming from the room*

    Guard 1: What is he doing to her?

    Guard 2: Skiddoo, young one.

    Guard 1: Christ...

    *Suddenly, DU Monarch appears, and the guards salute him*

    DU Monarch: Where's Dukamu? Is he inside?

    Guard: Yessir.

    DU Monarch: Well when he's finished, let him know that I've captured another catalyst by the name of Kulnak.

    *He marches off, and the guards look at each other and shrug*

    --------------------------------

    OOS: Will respond to the rest after DRJ posts


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Mon Dec 22, 2014 7:30 am

    <Stelta-Stal>
    Blackout: You're a fool!
    *Still holding Caiaphus tight, he teleports them both to a different part of the complex*
    Blackout: You have no purpose!
    *He lets go of Caiaphus, then suddenly fires a beam of eclipse energy into his chest*
    ---
    Xintrix: Bloody hell!
    *They both start using chain lightning on the Rahkshi*
    ---
    *Brawl's armour is cracked in many places, but it fails to give way*
    *He also charges his fists with Shattering power, and takes a swing at Starok's chin*

    *OB emerges from the smoke, his armour cracked and battered, his arm missing*
    *Looking around, he notices that Kivalon and Xikella are missing*
    *He fires a shadow hand at the still confused SMK, trying to pull him towards himself*

    -----

    <Mordor>
    *Ynot turns, and notices Coro writhing on the floor*
    *He dashes over to Figlio, and floors him with a punch*
    *He then turns to Coro, wondering how to help him*
    Ynot: *to Figlio* What did you do to him, you bastard? *to the Knights* Guys, I need help over here!

    -----

    <Malchior IV>
    Aster: He's a friend of mine, another shape-shifter. He replaced some bigwig at FDR spaceport, and I'm pretty sure he's the only person who can get us off this planet without the ZFT finding out. Their spies are everywhere now. I just need to convince him.....
    *Aster tries to contact her friend telepathically, but for some reason, she can't seem to do it*
    ---
    *Back on Roodaka's ship, Jones is trying to Assume Direct Control of Aster (like he did with Deusoma a few pages ago) but for some reason, he can't do it*
    Jones: Damn it! What's the problem? *He turns to a man in a lab coat behind him* You told me the connection would work at all times!
    Dr. Keyes: And it should. I can check, of course, but what's more likely is that when you tried to terminate Aster, her connection to the shape-shifter network was deactivated. She may now be beyond your control.
    *Jones mutters something under his breath*

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>
    553: Is that.....?
    SB: Hey, guys, it's a real live Klak!
    *He charges at Klak, emitting a loud power scream*

    -----

    <Saskana>
    *If Mazkertis looks out of the hatch, he can see a large military base behind them, and several jagged glass spires on the horizon ahead of them*
    Von Budberg: See zhose spiress? Zhat's vhere veer going.
    ---
    Strika: Well..... I could upload the radiation readings from my sensors from the time of his attack and see if Astro- the ship's sensors can pick up anything like it. But it'd be a long shot.
    *She gets to work doing exactly that*

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>
    F-Blackout: I'm glad you ask, Fourteen. You see, in my home galaxy, I happen to be a leading crime lord. The Lord of the Obsidian Belt, they call me. I'd like to discuss a deal with your Lord Ozar.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Mon Dec 22, 2014 8:44 pm

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *The Rahkshi screech as they are caught in the electrical field, and become immobilized*

    -----

    *Starok's Mask of Incomprehension is smashed into several pieces from the center outwards, and he covers his face with his spare hand*

    Starok: No respect...

    *He then removes his hand and Power Screams Brawl*

    -----

    *In response to OB's shadow hand, SMK creates his own, which pulls OB's one off his body and wrestles it in mid-air*

    SMK: Ah, there's no problem that can't be solved with an arm wrestle... I think.

    --------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Heavy removes the lead pipe from the door and opens it a crack to peer out*

    *He sees that the guards are already marching the prisoners back to their cells*

    Heavy: It is time.

    *JC Denton suddenly sees a pigeon next to him*

    Pigeon: Go in and go in and go in like the U.S. Marshal and his three daughters! Get moving!

    JC Denton: I am prepared to perform my duties.

    *Heavy pushes open the door, and the characters form a line, running across the hall while crouched down*

    Guard: Wait, did you hear that?

    Dr. Pavel: Nothing! I heard nothing!

    *The characters quickly crawl under the tables in the middle of the hall when the guards turn back to see what the noise was, but they turn back around again after seeing nothing*

    Seran: That was close.

    *They continue onwards, and eventually make it to the kitchen*

    *By this time, the guards have noticed that a significant amount of prisoners are missing from their cells, so they raise the alarm and the level is put on lockdown. A bulkhead slams shut in front of the kitchen door, so there's no turning back now*

    Linkara: Too easy!

    *They stand up, and look around the kitchen for the door that leads to the garbage ship docking bay. While exploring, Seran notices a large, superheated oven with a crudely-made sword inside*

    Seran: Guys... what's thees?

    Heavy: [worried laughter]

    *Seran and Heavy notice tall shadow fall over them. When they turn around to see who it belongs to, they find themselves face-to-face with Koranis*

    Koranis: YAAARRGH!

    *He kicks Seran in the chest and throws him aside, before tackling Heavy to the ground*

    Heavy: Hah! You are no match for me!

    *After wrestling for a few moments, Koranis gets Heavy in a headlock*

    Koranis: Who are you?

    *The other characters rush over*

    Spoony: Wait! He's one of us!

    Koranis: One of who?

    Spoony: We just wanna get out of here, man. We ain't got anything to do with the guards.

    Koranis: You're... prisoners?

    Doug: Well duh!

    *Koranis lets Heavy go, and stands up*

    Koranis: Stay out of my way. That ship is mine.

    *He walks over to the oven and reaches into it, pulling out the sword. Several of the characters realize that he has been forging the sword in the oven, using the metal from stolen cutlery*

    *Several faint voices from outside the kitchen can now be heard*

    Guard: They're in there! Get this door open!

    *The bulkhead in front of the door retracts into the ceiling, but Heavy runs over to jam the door with his lead pipe just in time*

    Heavy: Until the coward alien with the sword wants to show Heavy the way to docking bay, we might have to fight guards like big men.

    *Amasiv Bedge screams, and hides behind a fridge*

    *Several dents are made in the door, and it bursts open*

    --------------------------

    <Hungry-man's ship, Meme World>

    *There is a golden glow above the joke characters, and Dennis floats down from the wrecked ceiling of the ship*

    Dennis: What is the meaning of this?!

    Smee: We were betrayed, SIR! Juan Avyu was actually... Juan Avem! He's working for an outside, evil party!

    Dennis: He crashed the ship?

    Smee: Yeah. It's a good thing he wasn't a big guy, or he would have crashed the ship... with NO survivors!

    Dennis: Well then, we'd better find out just where we in the heck we are.

    *He fires a large energy blast at the wall next to them, which knocks it down and reveals the surface of Meme World*

    ---------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    ???: Him? Owner? You've got to be kidding me. Just because he's been squatting here for a while doesn't make it his.

    *Quolas sheathes his sword and steps forward*

    Quolas: I tried to reason with you, but when it became clear that you would not co-operate, I took residence in this fortress myself.

    ???: I know.

    Quolas: You see, this place is surrounded by an electromagnetic field unique to anywhere else in the multiverse.

    ???: I know.

    Quolas: I am a Time Guardian of the Sha'lythe Sect?

    ???: Who cares? Open fire.

    *The other strangers fire their arrows at the group*


    Last edited by Kon on Thu Dec 25, 2014 1:56 am; edited 2 times in total


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Mon Dec 22, 2014 10:15 pm

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "The rumors are true. He does have a bad temper. And yeah, Etende, just look for the black toolbox in the back."

    *Lalli Cain looks at the others*

    Lalli: "How long have you known Klak?"

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    *A mysterious creature wearing a hood and a mask (similar to the one in this picture, courtesy of Star Wars) kneels before Dukamu*

    ???: "Hail to thee, great Kakamu! Thou art destined to rule! The Simurgh bows before you."

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus yells as he is hit by the eclipse energy. He is blasted back, but is still floating. He clutches the wound in his chest and smiles. He starts to heal the wound*

    Caiaphus: "I have purpose! I am to lead the Legion of Makuta, the Reformed Second Brotherhood, to VICTORY! Then, I will use them to make this universe crumble! My ultimate purpose is to corrupt our little friend, and be a thorn in your side FOREVER! You'll never understand what it means to be a Makuta!"

    *Caiaphus fires a blast of chaos energy at Blackout's chest, hoping that it will disrupt the matter in his armor*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Everyone rushes to Coro. Figlio smiles as he gets up, and wipes a bit of blood coming out of his mouth. D-Klak (4) angrily uses Force choke on him*

    D-Klak (4): "What did you do, you monster?"

    Figlio: "*he still smiles* Egh...I simply....activated the programming that...the others....made....Coro talked out of turn....so his colleagues....turned him into that.....and they put in....egh.....something......as a failsafe....mind control....egh.....but Coro's vow of silence made them forget all about it after a while! Just ask TPK! But me? egh.....I'm....resourceful. See.....this is what happens....when you stand in the way of....egh....what I intend to achieve!"

    D-Klak (4): "All that with not enough oxygen getting to your brain, I'm impressed."

    Figlio: "I'm smart enough.....to know.....not to hurt your only chance....of saving....yourselves"

    D-Klak (4): "We both know Mazkertis, yes."

    Figlio: "Him too....egh"

    *Coro stands up with red eyes. He charges at Ynot and the Knights*

    Cutter: "Coro?"

    *Coro slams his fist into Cutter, and kicks Spotter. Moe widens his eyes and throws a smoke grenade on the floor. He seems to disappear. Coro turns to Ynot and attempts to shut down his body using technopathy*

    *D-Klak (4) lets go of Figlio, and runs towards the others*

    *Figlio turns around, and starts walking towards Angonce's cell*

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "If that doesn't work.....maybe we can find Klak. Do you think he's still alive? Maybe Lt. Manning was lying."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Klak jumps away from the power scream, and lands behind Shadow Blade. He uses his Crast on the Makuta in an attempt to repel him into the nearest wall*

    Julio: "KLAK?! KLAK! KLAAAAAAAAK!"

    *He wildly charges at Klak*

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *Mazkertis silently nods. He seems to have an inquisitive look on his face.*

    --

    Perseus: "Radiation and magic? Pfft. Whatever."

    *Perseus angrily looks outside the ship*

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    Fourteen: "He's busy. Schedule an appointment."

    *Fourteen starts to walk away*

    Akzer: "Fourteen, this man came a very long way for a deal. This could be your chance to get an even bigger promotion. Who knows? Maybe you'll be a Pirate Lord yourself someday. Being First Mate gets old, don't you think?"

    *Fourteen stops, and pauses.*

    Fourteen: "Of course, I could always relay the message to 'im. What do ya want?"

    *Akzer winks at Raigen*

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    *In the midst of the commotion, Doug turns to the Eastern European man from before, who was following them all this time*

    Doug: "Wait, you're THE Dr. Pavel?"

    Dr. Pavel: "Yes, I am."

    Spoony: "Why are you here?"

    Dr. Pavel: "I am hiding from this strange man CIA, and from a masketta man. I also built dangerous devices."

    Linkara: "Now's not the time to talk, guys! That comes later!"

    *Paul Latza, Doug, and Linkara pull out their guns, while Spoony pulls out a spoon. They charge at the guards. Dr. Pavel points at the critics in an attempt to distract the guards*

    Dr. Pavel: "They are not my friends!"

    *JC Denton punches one of the guards and takes his sunstick. He swings it at the other guards while silently wishing for a GEP gun. Mortimer Moloch tries to use magic on the enemies*

    ---

    <Hungry-man's ship, Meme World>

    *The Kind Old Man breaks free from the wreckage with Carrots, James, and Franz*

    Hide-the-Pain Harold: "Perhaps the Ta'har sent a double agent?"

    *Maimen shakes his head*

    Maimen: "A lotta loyalty for a hired gun!"

    *Space Ryan Gosling walks out of the wreckage and into Meme World. He stares at a Rage Comic flower. Hassan-ill-Sabah follows him*

    Hassan-ill-Sabah: "What a strange new world that we are in. I hope we survive, despite Juan's sin."

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *D-Klak runs from the arrows while shooting his gunblade. Some of them graze his right leg. One of the arrows hits Nadle, though it only scratches his armor*

    Nadle: "Wait! Listen to us! Someone is going to erase our timelines, and this place is instrumental in stopping him!"

    *Bob charges at the humans, and swings his fists at them*

    OOS: I hope I'm not missing anything. Included something for you, Redwolf Razz


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by redwolfmoon99 on Mon Dec 22, 2014 10:26 pm

    [Liquid-Metallican Pub]

    *As the others are currently engaged in a discussion that he found he doesn't really care about for now, Raigen takes the opportunity to sidle up to the bar counter.*

    Raigen: Hey, bartender. Can I get another bottle of your finest vodka? (Notices Akzer's wink) I have a feeling I'm gonna need it pretty soon...

    ~~~

    OOS: Paws! Paws, where art thou?
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Thu Dec 25, 2014 2:30 am

    *Everybody hears a man going "ho, ho, ho" in the distance*

    -----

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout creates a shield of maroon mist around himself, hoping to block the chaos blast*

    *The blast hits the shield, creating a shockwave that pushes both Blackout and Caiaphus away*

    ---

    *Barricade and Xintrix keep up their attack, hoping to kill the Rahkshi*

    ---

    *OB smiles weakly, and his shadow hand dissipates*

    OB: They told you to distract me, didn't they?


    *Brawl growls, and uses his Silence power to create a cone of silence around Starok*

    *He then punches him in the gut*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot is about to charge at Coro, but the gears in his armour seize up*

    *He curses, and uses his power over iron to make Coro punch himself in the face*

    *In the melee, he doesn't notice Figlio getting away*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: I don't know why he'd lie, Rainn. I think Klak really is dead.

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Klak does not jump away from the power scream, because you can't dodge a noise*

    *SB is repelled into a wall*


    *553 ducks behind the car, and opens the boot*

    *He takes a bottle of whisky from one of the boxes, drops a match in it, and hurls it at Klak*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *The sensors do not pick up anything*

    Strika: Damn it. We need another plan.

    -----


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Fri Dec 26, 2014 10:55 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Most of the Rahkshi are destroyed, but those of Quick Healing, Adaption, and Limited Invuln charge towards the Makuta unaffected and swing their staffs at them*

    -----

    SMK: Yeah.

    -----

    *Starok doubles over in pain as his stomach-armour is crushed and falls to the floor*

    *Before Brawl can stomp on him however, he uses his power of magnetism to pull himself up and attach to the ceiling*

    Starok: You're a... ahk... big guy.

    *He clutches his stomach with one hand, trying to stop antidermis from leaking out*

    -------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Etende: Got it, thanks!

    *She goes to work on Muta, while the others gather around Lalli*

    Micros: Me and Masa are new to this kind of stuff. We only just met 'im a few weeks ago.

    -------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    *Dukamu slowly turns round to face the Simurgh*

    Dukamu: What is this?

    -------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *The guards at the front are knocked to the floor by the stunsticks, magic and giant spoons, but more keep coming, like a scene from a Nolan movie*

    Seran: Thees ees insane!!

    *He opens a cupboard and climbs into it*

    *Suddenly gunfire can be heard, and the guards retreat back into the hall*

    *The escapees move back to hide behind a sink between them and the hall. They peek over it to see a man in a suit and tie approach them with a shotgun in hand. He fires at them several times as they move around, and the bullets ricochet off the sink*

    Man: This is a Supermax prison!! Do you have any idea who you're running from? You and your friends are DEAD!

    -------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    Hungry-man: blimey

    *He burps, and wanders off to explore*

    Carrots: Is everyone accounted for?

    Patrick Bateman: Everyone except that CIA guy.

    *Suddenly, the pieces of wreckage he is standing on shift, and he jumps away before he falls over. CIA bursts forth, and angelic music plays as he grabs his belt*

    Smee: SIR! You're alive!!!

    CIA: Surviving the crash was part of my plan! I did it... for you!

    *Smee runs forward to hug him*

    Smee: I knew you could do it, SIR.

    -----

    *Meanwhile, in the damaged but mostly intact toilet room of the ship, the real Juan Avyu is being held above the giant toilet bowl by his feet. The big guy holding him laughs through his mask*

    Juan Avyu: Please, let me go! I never did anything to you!

    Bane: No... but you would have, if you knew what we were going to do. My accomplice here has taken your place.

    *Juan Avem steps forward and smiles menacingly while holding his stolen Spytech disguise kit in one hand*

    Juan Avyu: You'll pay for this! CIA will never allow you to rule our people, to rule this world!!

    Bane: I'm a rich man. CIA doesn't need my permission to rule... only my permission to die.

    Juan Avyu: You're... pure evil!

    Bane: I am necessary evil.

    *He lets go of Avyu's foot, and he falls screaming into the toilet water. One of Bane's hired guns jumps on the giant handle that flushes the toilet*

    A hired gun: What's gonna happen to that guy? There's no sewers on this ship.

    Bane: He will be recycled by the matter converter below it. Who knows, he might even make a good omelet.

    *He walks away, leaving the hired gun feel slightly sick at the thought of it*

    -------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *A couple of the natives are knocked out by Bob, and others aim arrows at him. Before they can fire, their leader raises his hand*

    ???: Stop! You! 

    *He points at Nadle*

    ???: How did you know about the time-wheel?

    *Another native whose leg was grazed by the blast from D-Klak's gunblade speaks up*

    ???2: Ben, it's a trick! They're obviously just here for the light!

    *Ben, the leader, squints at Nadle and co.*

    Ben: Hmm... maybe. Tell you what. Hand over your weapons, and we can talk.

    *He then hears the "Ho, ho, ho" and his eyes widen*

    Ben: Tomas, take a team to check upstairs. We might have more guests than previously thought.

    *Tomas and a couple others run around the corner to see if Santa is around*


    Last edited by Kon on Sat Dec 27, 2014 2:36 am; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Fri Dec 26, 2014 2:35 pm

    <BZPB>

    *Across the multiverse, Santa Claus/Father Christmas appears, giving everyone gifts. Joy and Christmas cheer spreads throughout the universe as everyone takes a break to smile and have fun. They wish each other a Merry Christmas, then get back to what they were doing (unless, of course, a Polish or British Santa decides to come along as well)*

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallican Pub>

    *The bartender walks up to Raigen, and hands him a large bottle of vodka*

    Bartender: "There you are. Keep your ears open, there may be a job offer from these three."

    Akzer: "Well, what's the message, Von Ness?"

    *Fourteen raises his eyebrow while looking at F-Blackout*

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus is pushed away by the shockwave. He regains his composure and fires a disruption beam at Blackout's shield, hoping to dispel the mist. He also manipulates gravity around Blackout in an attempt to crush him*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Axalara attempts to blow Coro back with wind, but he shuts her gears down as well. He continues punching himself in the face*

    *Moe reappears in front of him, and throws a small grenade at Great Being's hand. It bursts, spreading a sticky, gum-like chemical all over his hand and face*

    *Coro grunts as his hand is now stuck to his face*

    D-Klak (4): "Keep him distracted! I'll try using my telepathy to get rid of his programming!"

    *D-Klak (4) concentrates*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Rainn's Location>

    Rainn: "*sighs somberly* If Klak is dead, and the rumors are true, then Jortenn is gone as well. And my other friends are dead too. I'm tempted to stay as Malchior IV's new protector but...."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Klak realizes he can't dodge a noise, and is knocked back by the power scream. Julio trips over him and falls flat on his face*

    *He is hit by the whiskey bottle, and is set on fire. He uses his power of Fire Resistance*

    *Klak gets up and shoots a blast of light at 553. Anarky runs up to the Makuta, and kicks him. Klak jumps over his kick, and swings his Keyblade into Anarky's side*

    Me: I need some time alone with Rahn, please!

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Perseus: "We should have gone with my idea, but anyway...."

    *He rubs his 'chin' for a moment, then looks back at Strika*

    Perseus: "Mazkertis killed some of your people from up close, didn't he? Scan for CNA."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "I just met him today. Still, I heard many stories about him a few years ago. And I heard even more back in the war. Say, speaking of stories, did I tell you about the time I was nearly hired for a suicide mission involving a maniac named Paxton Fettel? Or how about the one about the man who was visited by three ghosts?"

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    The Simurgh: "Perchance thou didst not hear me. I am The Simurgh, and I am known for mine brilliance in battle. I has't cometh to giveth mine services to thee and thy quest. I see thee as a king, and as a conqueror. I foresee blessings in your favor shouldst ye choose to align thineself with me."

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    JC Denton: "AMOBB!"

    Doug: "Who?"

    Agent 47: "The Vice-Warden. He's more ruthless than Lemongrab, but he is not as strict. He operates by his own rules. Like I do."

    *Boris Johnson bursts out of one of the cupboards, and throws a miniature bike at the man*

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *The Kind Old Man feels Juan Avyu's death in the Force, but he hides the pain once again*

    *Harold forces a smile, and nods at the joke characters near him*

    Harold: "Let's explore!"

    *Hassan-ill-Sabah walks up to Hungry-Man and attempts to get his attention. SRG continues staring at the Rage Comic xDDD Flower*

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    Nadle: "Time wheel, what do you mean?"

    D-Klak: "I'm not lowering my weapons until you lower yours. We won't....ugh *winces because of his wound*....shoot each other out of fear of mutually assured destruction. Capice?"

    Bob: "We all just need to take it easy, ok?"

    OOS: I hope I'm not missing anyone, or anything.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Sat Dec 27, 2014 2:57 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout's shield is dispelled by the beam*

    *He can feel his armour buckling under the strain, and he uses his own gravity powers to counter Caiaphus' attack*

    Blackout: You fight valiantly for someone who claims he cannot die. Why? Why do you bother?

    *He puts his present away, and fires a volley of shadow bolts at Caiaphus*

    ---

    *Xintrix sighs, and sweeps a beam of Molecular Disruption over the Rahkshi charging at him, hoping to disintegrate their armour*

    *Barricade does the same with his Disintegration power*

    ---

    *OB nods, and suddenly creates a gravity field around SMK, trying to crush his armour to bits*

    OB: Then I shall have to settle for your scalp.

    ---

    *Brawl growls, and starts shooting laser eye-beams at Starok*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot uses his illusion power to create the appearance of four Ynots charging at Coro simultaneously*

    *At the same time, he tries to get his armour working again*

    Ynot: I need to talk to Vultran about that.....

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: Hm. I can't seem to contact him telepathically. Something's wrong, badly wrong.....

    *She buries her head in her hands in despair*

    Aster: Damn it, what have I done.....

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *553 is hit in the chest, and falls backwards, badly burned*

    *SB looks at Klak, then at 553*

    *He sighs, runs over to 553 and starts healing him*

    SB: Why, so you can kill him again?

    -----

    <Saskana>

    Strika: Good idea.

    *She does exactly that, and finds a single moving signal*

    Strika: There we go!

    *The ship hurtles towards the planet, and within minutes it hits the atmosphere*

    *They can see the incoming gunship on their radar*

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    *F-Blackout nods at Akzer, as if to thank him*

    *He turns to Fourteen and rubs his chin*

    F-Blackout: Tell him I'd like to sell him the exclusive rights to an asteroid field. It's not that far away from here, and it's quite a lucrative opportunity.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Sat Dec 27, 2014 10:40 pm

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *The Rahkshi are disintegrated, apart from a trio of Limit Invuln ones, where the blasts simply bounce off their armour. They reach the Makuta, and one of them stabs its sharpened staff into Xintrix's throat. Some of the Kraata from the other, fallen Rahkshi escape and slither away*

    -----

    *SMK grunts and struggles to move as his armour folds in on itself*

    SMK: Is that... the best you got..?

    *While he still can, he uses his own magnetism power to pull OB towards the gravity field as well*

    -----

    *Still on the ceiling, Starok turns over and crawls out of the way of the eyebeams. He then positions himself above Brawl, and swaps his magnetism power for one of Density Control. In the space of a second, he increases his weight by ten times that of his opponent, and drops on top of him*

    -------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Micros: Ghosts? What are ghosts?

    *From inside the ship, Etende makes a spooky "Oooohhhhhh!" noise*

    -------------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    Dukamu: The battle here is won, Simurgh, but another is coming. My army is ready to wreak vengeance on the gods who abandoned us. I appreciate your loyalty, for it will take the efforts of every last soul in our universe to destroy them. Walk with me.

    *He turns and starts walking down the plain, white, seemingly endless corridor. He clicks his fingers, and the Simurgh feels compelled to walk alongside him*

    Dukamu: Tell me about your army.

    -------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *The bike hits the Vice-Warden, knocking him to the ground and causing his shotgun to go off. The bullet hits one of the guards in the chest, killing him*

    *Dr. Pavel starts screaming, but Heavy puts his hand over his face*

    Heavy: Shh! Now is not time for fear, baby man. That comes later.

    *While the others are distracted, Koranis pushes a fridge over, revealing a secret doorway to a metal corridor. He runs inside and disappears, but the crashing sound the fridge made gets Spoony's attention*

    Spoony: There!

    *He runs into the secret doorway as the guards charge into the kitchen. Heavy acts as a human wall, standing between the others and the guards, punching and finger-gunning them down*

    Heavy: GO! NOW! Heavy will buy you time!

    Doug: I'm not leaving without you! What about my freakin' money?!

    Dr. Bedge: Bye!

    *He runs into the doorway, followed by Spoony and Dr. Pavel. JC Denton uses his Spy Drone augmentation, which sends a miniature drone from his body to whiz around the guards and zap them with electricity*

    -------------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *Hungry-man looks at Hassan with a vacant expression*

    Hungry-man: wot are you s'posed ta be? sum kinda arab or somefin?

    *The Guy Who Was Engulfed In Milk and The fresh prince of fresh fruit climb out of the wreckage, looking confused*

    *Carrots disappears for a few minutes, but then returns carrying Golden Flame's body*

    Carrots: We should have a proper funeral for this fallen warrior and the others who were slain by the Ta'har. Poor lad.

    *A couple of Happy People follow Harold, thinking he is one of them, and not realizing the depth of the pain that he hides behind his smile*

    *Meanwhile, a cybernetic arm grabs onto SRG's foot. The person it is attached to pulls herself out of the hole in front of him. She is a white-skinned Terugan woman who is wearing a red and grey captain's uniform. She tries to walk, but instead falls over and cries out in pain*

    ???: Aghhh! My leg! I think it's broken. Damn it, at this rate I'll be more machine than woman.

    *She looks up at SRG*

    ???: Little help?

    -------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Ben eyes them suspiciously*

    Ben: Okay...

    *He raises his arms and untucks his shirt, showing that he has no weapons. The others drop their bows, and one approaches Quolas to take his sword. Quolas growls and backs away, so the human gets backup and they take it by force*

    Ben: Let's discuss this somewhere more comfortable, hmm?

    *He presses a brick on the wall, and a section of it slides away, revealing the room that the Claws were in the first time they were here (the one with the advanced computer and sofa).*

    Ben: Oh look, you've even redecorated...

    *Everyone walks into the room and sits down on the sofa and chairs that weren't there before to talk things out*


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Sun Dec 28, 2014 10:49 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus attempts to absorb the shadow bolts. He succeeds with some, but the others blast him back*

    Caiaphus: "Be silent!"

    *He regains composure and fires a disruption beam out of one hand and Palpatine-style lightning out of the other*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Coro removes the gum from his face and starts fighting the illusions*

    *D-Klak (4) continues to concentrate. Coro screams as he is also struggling to lift the shackles of the mind control*

    *Moe throws bolas at Coro's legs in an attempt to trip him, but the Great Being jumps over them. He stumbles and swings his fist at Moe, knocking him down. Coro turns to the illusions again and begins to fight them*

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "What is it, Aster? Did ZFT find him?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    Me: I didn't kill him, the other Klak did. But that's not important right now.

    *Klak menacingly walks up to Shadow Blade*

    Me: I guess I'll just ask you. Where is Caiaphus?!

    *Anarky starts laughing as he gets up*

    Anarky: "He doesn't know, does he?"

    *Rahn has a confused look on his face*

    Rahn: "Caiaphus is dead. We're working for Blackout now."

    Me: You what?! So he isn't alive? *Klak appears to sigh in relief for a brief second* So why are you and 553, of all people in the universe, working for Blackout?

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Perseus: "Here they come! DRIVE CLOSER! We'll smash into their cockpit!"

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    Fourteen: "Right, I'll do that."

    *Fourteen leaves*

    Akzer: "*whispers to F-Blackout* Be careful. Fourteen's a telepath. I'm surprised he hasn't scanned our minds yet. *out loud* Hey, Raigen, how are you holding up?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "Frightening things! Spirits! For all you know, one could be here at this very moment!"

    *Lalli Cain looks at Etende and winks at her from far away*

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    The Simurgh: "Fortune smiles upon thee for inquiring as such. What thou seeth 'ere is my army. Yea, 'tis I."

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    *Doug runs away while hanging onto his cap*

    Linkara: "No! I won't run away! I AM A MAN!"

    *He punches one of the guards, and smiles. He then leaves*

    *Boris Johnson walks up to Amobb "You And Your Friends Are Dead" Banks, and adjusts his tie*

    Boris Johnson: "You were saying?"

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    Hassan-ill-Sabah: "I am Hassan-ill-Sabah, man of hungah. I lay down ill rhymes in my spare times."

    *The joke characters salute at Carrots and start preparing for the funeral*

    *Several of them are shocked by the woman*

    *TTT attempts to help her with his 5 rings lifting powar*

    *A dedodated wam explosion is seen in the distance*

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    Nadle: "Who are you? What is the time wheel?"


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Wed Dec 31, 2014 9:56 am

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Micros is unsettled by this idea, and looks around for ghosts. When he turns his gaze to the sky, he points, screams, and retreats inside Masaharu's armour*

    *Masaharu looks up and sees what Micros saw moments ago: a black, metallic object hurtling towards them at breakneck speed*

    Masaharu: Graaagh....

    *The spikes on his body extend and he assumes a defensive posture*

    *After a few moments, the object slams into the earth merely metres away from the group, and they are sent flying by the shockwave. The back end opens up and a blue-white figure is shot out. Miraculously, she flips over and lands perfectly on her feet, not disorientated at all. She is more surprised by Lalli and Masharu being there*

    ???: Woah, Kakamu wasn't kidding when he said these co-ordinates would be close to you guys... assuming that you guys... are you guys. You are, right?

    *She raises her two fork-like weapons just in case*

    ---------------------------

    <Archon-7>

    *Trantoshen waits for his gryphon friend to answer Dee's question, but he does not*

    Trantoshen: Evander?

    *He walks up to his gryphon friend and clicks his fingers, but he does not respond. He is instead staring into nothingness with a blank expression*

    Trantoshen: Huh. Uh... he doesn't usually do this. Hey, you know what, maybe you two could help me with something!

    *He runs inside the cave, emerging a few moments later holding the mysterious disk of Evander's that had brought him to the planet in the first place*

    Trantoshen: Have you ever seen anything like this before?

    *He hands it to Nadira, but as it leaves his hands, it glows bright yellow and vibrates*

    ---------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    *Dukamu turns to the Simurgh, and raises an eyebrow*

    Dukamu: Interesting... I must learn how to do that.

    *DU Monarch reappears at the end of the corridor. He sees them both and goes to greet them*

    DU Monarch: Ah! Just the warlord I was looking for. 

    Dukamu: Adam. Have you collected the new ingredients like I asked?

    DU Monarch: If by "ingredients" you mean a suit of gas, yes. He was nowhere near as deadly as you made him out to be, might I add.

    Dukamu: He is a Makuta. Does that mean anything to you?

    DU Monarch: Can't say it does.

    Dukamu: He is one of what I once was... before they became me.

    *DUM is pained upon hearing another cryptic answer, but hides it beneath his helmet*

    DU Monarch: Yes, my lord.

    *He turns around and inputs the co-ordinates of the UG into the advanced vortex manipulator on his wrist, but before he can disembark to his favourite pocket-dimension, it starts beeping to notify him of something else*

    DU Monarch: Wait... what? Can you be sure?

    Vortex manipulator: Energy signature confirmed. Jopulon energy detected.

    DU Monarch: Oh wow. Sir, you're going to want to see this.

    *He turns back around and stretches his arm out to show Dukamu the readings on his VM, but Dukamu simply rips it off his wrist and holds it up to his eyes*

    Dukamu: Locate source of Jopulon energy!

    Vortex manipulator: Narrowing search... source detected. Planet identified as Archon-7, the seventh planet in the Archon system, the seventh system in the Epsilon Galaxy. Calculating co-ordinates.

    DU Monarch: Does that mean anything to you?

    *Dukamu slaps the VM back on DUM's wrist*

    Dukamu: Retrieve the source and return it to me. Kill all who stand in your way.

    DU Monarch: Sure. I'll be back within the hour.

    *He inputs a new set of co-ordinates to Archon-7 into the VM, and waits for his suit to teleport him to them. After it loads, he disappears in a flash*

    Dukamu: I apologize, Simurgh. Until now, I was under the impression that Jopulon energy was exclusive to our universe. Please, continue.

    ---------------------------

    <Archon-7>

    *There is a bright blue burst of energy next to the group. Trantoshen covers his eyes with his hand, and lowers it when the energy fades. In its place stands this, armed to the teeth with a matter cannon, sword and armour harder than diamond*

    DU Monarch: Greetings. I believe you have something that belongs to me.

    *He powers up his matter cannon and fires it at Evander. Trantoshen tackles the gryphon out of the way so the blast trails into the distance instead of vaporizing him. In response, DU Monarch traps both of them in an energy field, and turns to face Dee and Gene*

    DU Monarch: Give me the disk.

    ---------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    Amobb: Cuff him!

    *Some guards grab Boris, push him against a table and twist his arms behind his back*

    Boris: Ow, ow, ow! This really is ridiculous, all I meant to say was that-

    Amobb: Save it for the judge! The rest of you, get after them!!

    *More guards run through the kitchen after the others. Spanha coughs up something resembling melted cheese, which sticks a guard's feet to the floor and makes him fall over. After that, she turns and runs through the secret doorway. Guards pile on top of Heavy while he curses in Russian*


    ----------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *A couple of joke characters arrive with a stretcher, and the Terugan woman is lifted onto it by TTT's six rings power*

    ???: My ship... my... crew... help them...

    *She points towards the hills behind them, but falls unconscious before she can explain, and is carried away by said joke characters*

    TGWWEIM: What was that about? I don't remember her being on the ship. 

    ----------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Ben smiles*

    Ben: Well, my name is Benjamin Linus, and we are... a group of people who's sacred duty it is to protect this place. Obviously, we failed.

    *He gives Quolas a frustrated look*

    Ben: As for the time wheel-

    *Tomas, returns from upstairs*

    Tomas: Nobody there, but I did find some presents... wait, why are you telling them about the wheel?

    Ben: Relax. You must understand, I only asked you about the wheel because I thought you were all going to die. You could at least be grateful we spared your lives.

    Kakamu: Not to be boastful, but you couldn't kill me if you tried. Believe me.

    Ben: I don't believe you. If you're saying you can't die, then this island can change that. I've seen it do things you wouldn't believe.

    Quolas: The time wheel!

    Ben: Oh come on! What is else there to know? It's a wheel that moves us through time!

    -------------------------------

    OOS: Waiting for DRJ for the other stuff.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Thu Jan 01, 2015 9:48 am

    OOS: My last main post of 2014!

    -----

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout teleports away, and reappears behind Caiaphus*

    *He fires another volley of shadow bolts at him*

    ---

    *Xintrix groans (seeing as he can't scream*

    *He grabs hold of the staff and sends a bolt of lightning down its length*


    *Meanwhile, Barricade fires disintegration blasts at the other Rahkshi*

    ---

    *OB uses his own magnetism power to cancel out SMK's*

    *However, in doing so, he forgets about the gravity field, which fades away, freeing SMK*

    ---

    *Brawl is squished*

    *He tries to stab Starok with his Wolverine claws*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot finally gets his armour working again*

    *He uses his iron power to try and force Coro to kneel*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: No, no. It's nothing.....

    *She sits down on a tree stump*

    Aster: I can't hear them anymore. Not one of them. I just lost all of my friends.

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Suddenly, a portal opens in the sky above them, and F-Blackout falls out, with what appears to be an alien dog strapped to his back*

    *It starts barking at Klak*

    F-Blackout: There, there, Yorke, he's your friend. Well, he doesn't actively hate you.

    *The dog stops barking*

    SB: Lord Blackout? What are you doing here?

    F-Blackout: I'm on holiday, you idiot! I thought I'd check up on you guys.

    SB: .....Great.

    *He turns to Klak and smiles*

    F-Blackout: Hello, Klak. It's been a while.

    -----

    <Saskana>

    Pilot: What the? Lunatics!

    *The gunship suddenly swerves out of the way before they can crash*

    *Von Budberg and Mazkertis are flung across the deck*

    Von Budberg: Vhat izz going on?

    *Strika fires a missile at the gunship*

    -----

    <Liquid-Metalllicon>

    F-Blackout: A telepath? That's cute. I'm the most powerful Makuta in the universe, or I will be, anyway. He'll see whatever I let him see, and no more than that. Do you understand?

    *Meanwhile, a puppy enters the bar through the hole in the wall*


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Niflheim on Thu Jan 01, 2015 11:41 am

    <Dekan>
    -----------------------------
    The We'd Warriors had been lurking around, trying to find all the supplies they could. One of them, Wol, had found a huge stash of dank. We'd.
    "Life is now. 100% my. Warriors."

    He broke open the crate and rolled up some big joints for them to smoke.

    One of the others, Richard, simply responded; "Now What the F#ck is this! Deng."

    Another of them, Jean Paul, observed them sokeing all the. We'd
    "Wtf is wrong wif u fat niqkas, sokeing all the. We'd before battle."

    "Gotta get blazed to fight in a haze, Jean," responded Abit.



    <Meme World>
    -----------------------------
    Another Hassan appeared, and simply said "Haha Just saying."

    The crew were confused, but some went to go investigate the dedotated wam explosion for others, while the rest tried to salvage what they could from the cabin crash.



    <Hell>
    -----------------------------
    Nif shrugged off the death of the random lemure. He then spoke to Lord Mephistorth, "So, as I was saying, I'd like some assistance in leaving this place. I'm sure none are too pleased by the random teleportation of me into Hell anyways."


    <Unknown Desert World>
    -----------------------------
    The slug had left the palace room after his breakdown, to go fetch some we'd in the royal treasury. He took a pound of it and put it on the hovercart, along with some food such as chicken, fried oreos, grape and strawberry punch, and assortments of fruit.

    Driving the hover cart back to the room, he unloaded the food onto a tray to serve it to the fat black one.
    "Here you go, Lord Gaon."

    The fatty took the food and ravaged eating it, as if he had not eaten for a day, which was true here, as days were only 12 hours on this planet. The multiple suns did make things confusing, though. Gaon then went back to watching the game on his holo-screen TV.



    <The Mask's reality distortion>
    -----------------------------
    Tommy Wiseau's usage of the Mask had altered reality around them. They were not in Meme World anymore, but some strange distortion of San Francisco of Old Earth. The five dongers who were still awake and teleported with Tommy(The five being BONES, Shrek, Yon, See-man, and The Hand), were vastly confused but not surprised. It seemed at this point they should just get over random teleportations.

    "What now, mudderfuggers? You chicken to fight now on my own turf? Bawk bawk bawk!(Tommy shortly turning into an actual chicken during the mocking)."

    "You know, I'm getting real sick of your S**t, vampire!" Shrek then ran up and punched Tommy extremely hard in the face.

    "Oh, you've done it now, Hahaha, oh it's over now man."

    Tommy then produced a tommy gun and began shooting at Shrek. "Say hello to the american gun!" The gun also had a face, laughing while spewing endless bullets through Shrek. The green ogre was obliterated, thousands of holes through his chest, legs, and arms, but his head completely unscathed.

    "Haha Shrek, you know, I just wanted you to see what happens when you mess with me. But no hard feelings friend, I really liked your movie, Eddy Murphy." Shrek's bloodied green body then fell over, and his head rolled off.

    "What a good head for a mask man, hahaha." He held Shrek's head up to his head. "Kind of reminds me of another one that I am wearing right now!" He tossed the head over and then pointed the gun to the rest.

    "Now which one of you are next?"

    Yon motioned them to split up, and the four ran for it, all heading to a different building, but The Hand staying with See-Man.
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Fri Jan 02, 2015 1:44 pm

    OOS: First post of 2015!!

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Lalli Cain raises up a pistol at the mysterious newcomer*

    Lalli Cain: "Good evening. I'm Cain, Lalli Cain. Like the two murderers. We're friends of Kakamu. Who are you?"

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    The Simurgh: "To be truthful with thee, my liege, I must admit: word of the very existence of Jopulon energy is new to mine ears. Pray telleth, what is this mysterious energy that intrigues thee, and is present in other realities?"

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    Paul Latza: "He's not interested in being arrested!"

    *Paul charges at Amobb Banks, even if him and his friends would be dead*

    *JC Denton uses his drone augmentation to attack the guards that are attacking Heavy*

    *Agent 47 scowls at the chaos, and puts his hand to his ear*

    Agent 47: "My client has asked me to inform you that this is the last prison break you will ever see!"

    *He throws a shank at Amobb*

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    TTT: "Truley an unlimited mystery."

    *Space Ryan Gosling stops staring at the Rage Comic flower, and begins to survey the wreckage with the others. Rog Rogerson helps them as well. Confused-Man emerges and scratches his head*

    Confused-Man: "What happened?"

    --

    <Meme World, Volcano>

    *The Memes Kid panics. The conscious members of the Dong Squad were teleported away, and the rest had been knocked out by Tommy Wiseau. He had been following the Squad's adventures thanks to the reports of Big Man Tyrone and Rog Rogerson. He also sent fan mail to Lord Zrintch, hoping to get into contact with Yon and his squad. Did Tiny the Dwarf and Demopan die in vain? Would the Squad fail in stopping the HAPPENING? Would the enemy be victorious?*

    *King Harkininan attempted to comfort him*

    King Harkinian: "My boy, this peace is what all true warriors strive for!"

    *The kid shakes his head, and starts throwing volcanic rocks everywhere. The oppression of Wiseau could potentially end all memes, and destroy Meme World. LeTrole Rusemann laughed and continually asked the kid if he was "mad", while the Reddit Alien started crying*

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    Bob: "Hi, I'm Toa Bob! That's D-Klak, that's Nadle, that's Kakamu. I presume you already know Quolas."

    D-Klak: "It doesn't matter. We're trying to stop an old enemy of mine from changing the world as we know it. He wants to alter history to his liking, and that has potentially disastrous effects, even for this island."

    Nadle: "Perhaps it does matter. If Mazkertis's efforts are successful, what will happen to the time wheel?"

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus attempts to absorb the shadow bolts once again. He succeeds with some, but the others blast him back*

    Caiaphus: "The shadows make me strong, Blackout."

    *He growls and unleashes a plasma shockwave all around him*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Coro struggles against Ynot's power over iron, and staggers*

    *D-Klak (4) is sweating. He screams in pain, and collapses. Coro gasps and grabs his head. His eyes are blue once again.*

    Coro: "Wh....what happened?"

    *Axalara gets up with Spotter and Cutter. Moe comes out of hiding.*

    *Figlio's handcuffs are on the floor. He is hiding in the shadows of *

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "..What? ZFT must have killed them all."

    *Rainn angrily punches the fence and curses. He places his hand on Aster's back.*

    Rainn: "I know the feeling."

    *The sun continues setting*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    ((It's sunset here as well, btw))

    Me: WHAT? WHAT? YOU?! YOU?! Oh my gosh.

    *Klak raises his arms up in disbelief and starts walking around.*

    Me: Great, yet another time traveler. Can't I just have a normal enemy? If it isn't two time traveling Makuta...

    Rahn: "Three."

    Me: ...it's a time traveling wizard! And then there's the other enemies from other universes, or the invading overlords, or my nemesis who apparently is finally dead this time! Can't I catch a break? Maybe I need a holiday like you, Blackout! I mean, you must get tired from fighting Me-But-Not-Me all day! And you! *turns to Shadow Blade and the others* A bingo lounge? A bingo lounge. Really? REALLY? That's your best idea? Bombing an empty bingo lounge. *turns back to F-Blackout* You send a bunch of minions to my planet, and they turn out to be the most incompetent terrorists in the universe!

    Anarky: "Pfft, tell me about it. I've been trying to consult them on this."

    Me: Who are you, exactly?

    Anarky: "I am Anarky. I'm Malchior's re-"

    Me: Oh wow, an anarchist named Anarky with an A on his chest! Subtlety isn't your game, is it? Do you have any idea who you're working for? He's the exact opposite of anarchy! And Blackout, that mad scientist look? In your case? SO LAST MILLENNIUM!

    *Klak gasps and starts breathing, taking a pause from his rant*

    Rahn: "...Are you done?"

    Me: ....No, not yet.

    Rahn: "Oh boy."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *Mazkertis reaches out with his magic in an attempt to divert the missile away from its destination*

    ---

    <Liquid-Metalllicon>

    *Akzer glares at F-Blackout and bares his teeth*

    Akzer: "....Understood."

    *The puppy comes in*

    Akzer: "Raigen, is that your brother?"

    *The bartender holds his laughter as he realizes that Raigen might just tear his throat out*



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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Sat Jan 03, 2015 2:26 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *The Limited Invuln Rahkshi's invulnerability wears off, and its Kraata is roasted by Xintrix's electricity. It falls to the floor, defeated*

    *The other two throw their staffs like javelins at Barricade before they are blasted apart*

    -----

    SMK: Gah, I have better things to do than fight you all day. Tell Blackout to expect me.

    Starok: Don't you bail on me, boy!

    SMK: It's over, Starok! They have the high ground! We need to regroup!

    *He rolls away from OB, and charges his palms with plasma energy. He then presses down on the floor, melting his way through until he reaches space or another level of the ship*

    *Starok is pinned to the floor with Brawl's claws*

    Starok: Ahk... you underestimate... my power...

    *While tugging on Brawl's claws with one hand and looking away, he fires lightning blasts with the other*

    --------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *The stranger fires a lightning bolt from one of her forks at Cain's pistol, causing it to explode into a melted, plasticy mess*

    *She then twirls the fork around in her hand, and blows on its tip*

    ???: Easy there flesh-boy, Kakamu sent me. I'm Vyrrh, and since I owe him a favour, I'm here to help you fight a wizard or something. Now, seeing as a man made of biometal is scared of this guy, I'm guessing he's serious business, so you're gonna need something stronger than that.

    *She sheathes her forks and takes this off her back, before tossing it to Lalli*

    Vyrrh: You're welcome.

    *The strange metallic structure she arrived in fires something out once again, but this time the projectile is nowhere to be seen... although the group can hear something falling through the air. After a few moments, the invisible object lands, and a patch of grass is flattened underneath it. They see a shimmer, and the object reveals itself to be a crouching Toa of Ice wearing a silver Kanohi Huna, the mask of concealment. His mouthpiece is cracked, revealing the side of his real mouth, which is grimacing. As the Toa stands up and marches towards them, they get a closer look at his battle-worn armour and grey cape trailing behind him*

    Vyrrh: Ikhet.

    *The metallic structure shoots again, two more times, and two more Toa land face-first in front of the group. The first is another Toa of Ice who wears a Rau and a satchel instead of a cape. The second is a Toa with a very strange colour scheme; yellow and blue, with white hands. His mask is also unlike anything the others have seen before: It is yellow and bears a white, cartoonish grin, with black sunglasses*

    Vyrrh: Arkhite and Nohex.

    *They get to their feet, and Nohex gives an enthusiastic double thumbs-up to Lalli and Masaharu*

    *Arkhite rubs the back of his head, and turns to Vyrrh*

    Arkhite: Are these Kakamu's friends?

    Vyrrh: Apparently.

    --------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *There is a pause while Ben processes what D-Klak and Nadle tell him, followed by laughter*

    Ben: Nothing will happen to the time wheel, because you can't change time. It's impossible! Whatever happened, happened! I've witnessed firsthand the result of foolish efforts to change the past by the people that come here, and it has always ended in tragedy.

    Quolas: You're wrong.

    *Ben shakes his head and stands up*

    Ben: Why am I even listening to you? God knows how you got here but the first thing you did was... was set up camp in my temple! For no reason!

    Quolas: I've tried to tell you why, but you are either incapable or unwilling to listen.

    Ben: And you aren't?

    *Quolas stands up and walks over to Ben until they are standing face-to-face*

    Quolas: Give me my sword.

    *Ben's men raise their weapons at Quolas*

    Ben: Get back in your seat.

    Quolas: Give me my sword, and I will show you how time can be changed.

    Ben: Nice try, but I don't think so.

    Kakamu: Here we go...

    *He rises from his seat and walks towards Ben's guards, the second of which has Quolas' sword strapped to his back. They raise their bows and fire at Kakamu, but the arrows simply bounce off his biometal form. One of the guards decides to punch him instead, but breaks his fist in the process and falls to the ground. Using brute force, Kakamu beats the other guards down, takes Quolas' sword, and tosses it to his time-traveling friend*

    Quolas: Thank you. Now...

    *He grabs Ben's leg and tips him over. He then grabs his shoe, pulls it off, and throws it over his shoulder*

    Ben: Get off me!

    Quolas: How many toes does he have?

    Kakamu: Five...?

    Quolas: Alright Ben, let's go on a walk.

    *Using his sword, he slices a spacial tear into the air in the middle of the room, and throws Ben into it before stepping in himself*

    -----

    *A spacial tear opens, and a shoeless Ben rolls out of it. Quolas steps out behind him and looks around. The dust on the furniture in the room is gone, the computer is on instead of off, and there is now a coaster on the desk*

    Ben: Oh my God... did you just...

    *Another Ben, this time with slightly longer hair and different clothes, walks in and sees the two visitors from the future in front of him. He drops the mug he was carrying*

    Past Ben: What the...?

    *Without hesitation, Quolas steps forward and grabs Past Ben's right leg before lifting it up and pulling his right shoe off, causing him to fall on his back and panic*

    Past Ben: Who the hell are you?!

    Quolas: All in due time...

    *Present Ben watches as Quolas discards Past Ben's shoe and points at his middle toe*

    Quolas: Glaciation.

    *A stream of ice energy from Quolas' finger hits Past Ben's toe and freezes it solid... but solid isn't enough. Quolas continues until Past Ben's toe is cold enough for him to shatter with his fist, which he does. Past Ben screams in agony, and Quolas puts his shoe back on*

    Present Ben: ...

    *Quolas grabs onto Present Ben's arm, and throws him through the lingering spacial tear once more. He steps in himself, and it closes behind him*

    -----

    *Merely a second after Quolas and Ben left, they emerge from the spacial tear in front of Bob, Nadle, Kakamu and D-Klak. Quolas seals the tear with his sword, and pushes Ben over to hold his foot up to the group*

    Quolas: How many toes?

    Kakamu: Four. Didn't you already ask me that question?

    Quolas: Yes I did, and you said five.

    Kakamu: Uh... no, he's definitely always had his middle toe missing...

    Ben: ...how is this possible?!

    Quolas: I'm a Time Guardian. The rules don't apply to me, nor do they apply to the man we're up against. Now are you willing to help us?

    --------------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    Dukamu: There's no need to feel like a fool, Simurgh. Its existence is only known to a select few beings in all the cosmos... those brave enough to venture not just outside our universe, but outside all universes. Into the void... to find the Aleph. Come, I will show you the fruit of Jopulon's labour.

    *They continue walking down the corridor until faced with another white wall. Dukamu places his hand on it, and it folds away to reveal this room*

    Dukamu: The legends say that Jopulon sacrificed everything to reach the Void. He claimed to have been there before, when he was struck down in battle... at the point between life and afterlife. He punctured so many holes in the fabric of space-time just so that he could discover what was waiting there for him... and in the end, he succeeded. He disappeared through one of these holes and never returned. When my men went in to recover him, they too were lost... but then this... this beautiful object returned in their place. You see, Simurgh, Jopulon energy doesn't exist. It's just a word we have for a theoretical power source for this object... though I think it's a machine. So when Monarch typed the energy signature for Jopulon energy - "nothing" - into his tracking device, and something came up on a planet, far far away... what do you think that could mean?

    --------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *The shank hits Amobb in the chest, and he stumbles backwards into a chair*

    *Heavy throws guards left and right as they pile on him. While fighting some more off with his right hand, he opens the fridge with his left and finds a Buffalo Steak Sandvich inside*

    Heavy: Ooh, good idea! Hahahah!

    *He noms it, and his fists glow with minicrit power, which he uses to fight more of the guards with*

    --------------------------------

    OOS: Will reply to everything on Meme World later


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Sat Jan 03, 2015 6:09 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout uses his fire resistance power to withstand the plasma shockwave, but the heat nevertheless still scorches his armour*

    Blackout: Water nourishes a human, but they can still drown, can they not?

    *He fires a lightning bolt at Caiaphus*

    ---

    *Barricade rolls away, dodging the javelins*

    *He runs over to Xintrix, and tears the staff from his throat*

    *Xintrix gasps in a mixture of pain and relief*

    ---

    *Brawl gets hit by the lightning, and screams in pain*

    *OB laughs, and dashes over to Brawl and Starok, shooting eye-beams at the latter*

    ---

    *SMK finds himself floating in space*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot slowly releases his hold on Coro's armour*

    Ynot: Ugh..... are you alright, Coro?

    *Looking around, he finally notices that Figlio is nowhere to be seen*

    Ynot: God! Damn! It!

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster shakes her head*

    Aster: No.....no, you just don't get it. They're still alive. They're just not my friends anymore.

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *F-Blackout sighs*

    F-Blackout: I'm not fighting-Wait, this is a bingo lounge?

    *He turns to Rahn*

    F-Blackout: Explain yourself, vassal.

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *The missile falls into the ocean*

    Strika: What on earth?

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    F-Blackout: Good.

    *He notices the puppy, and squats down to pet him*

    F-Blackout: Hi, I'm Blackout. What's your name?

    *To his surprise, the dog telepathically responds*

    Puppy: "Yorke, sir Blackout."


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Mon Jan 05, 2015 2:32 pm

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Lalli Cain frowns as he grabs his new gun*

    Lalli Cain: "*mutters* You're lucky I hated that pistol. *out loud* Welcome. So, how dangerous is this wizard guy? Kakamu seems to be amassing an army or something."

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *D-Klak is amazed by what just happened. He mouths 'biometal', 'Time Guardian', and 'wow' to himself, then shakes his head*

    *Nadle smiles, and stands up*

    Nadle: "If Quolas did not convince you, then perhaps the fact that our red and purple friend over there is from 3 years in the past will. So, we will need this place."

    Bob: "Are you willing to help us?"

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    *Dukamu notices the Simurgh's expression change*

    The Simurgh: "This void hath the characteristics of the Sixth Dimension. Jopulon likely teleported to the other universe by traveling through it, which is wherefore Monarch hath found that gent, mine liege. *he raises his hand, nearly touching the object* Perchance tis some sort of vessel of transportation, or a prison housing thy men. Or.....thither art inhabitants the void."

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    *Agent 47 walks up to Amobb*

    Amobb: "You think you're pretty smart, huh? The guy who hired youze, he'll just do the same to you. Criminals in this galaxy, even the Pirate Lords, used to believe in things! Honor! Respect! Look at you...what do you believe in? WHAT DO YOU BELIEVE IN?"

    Agent 47: "Classified."

    *He punches Amobb, and knocks him out*

    Paul Latza: "Great work! Let's go! Heavy, Mortimer, and JC Denton will join us. They can handle it. *smile*"

    *He leaves with Agent 47*

    *JC Denton's drone is destroyed by a large guard with blue eyes and black clothing.*

    Mortimer: "I shall vanquish you!"

    *The guard punches Mortimer into the exit, knocking him out somehow*

    *JC Denton takes down other guards with his sun stick, and walks up to the blue-eyed one*

    JC Denton: "I am prepared to perform my duties."

    ???: "Be careful! I'm 100% Black!"

    *The guard pointed at his suit, meaning he was one of the most elite guards in the facility. These were some of the best of the best, handpicked for the purpose of containing riots. The only ones higher in rank were Javert, Amobb, and Lemongrab*

    *JC and his enemy start fighting*

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus strains as the lightning seems to be absorbed into his hands like this*

    Caiaphus: "No...NO....NO....YOU WILL DIE!"

    *He fires the lightning back at Blackout*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Coro: "I'm....agh...fine. What happened?"

    *Axalara rushes over to D-Klak (4), while Spotter cautiously helps Coro up*

    Spotter: "Apparently, someone programmed your mind. Figlio activated this and turned you against us."

    Coro: "..What? How did he know?"

    *A small piece of paper lies on the floor where Figlio used to be*

    --

    *Figlio reaches for a small communication device in his wrist. He whispers into it*

    Figlio: "Turel, come in Turel. Our initiate failed to rescue me. I need you to come to Mordor to get me out of here."

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "They've been turned against you. I'm so sorry, Aster."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    Rahn: "My name isn't Vassal, it's Rahn. And we were being conned by someone who attends this lounge! We had to have our revenge."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Perseus: "That was him. Get closer! We'll board the ship and fight them to the death!"

    *Meanwhile, Mazkertis seems to motion for Von Budberg to order his pilot to get closer to the Cybertronian ship*

    ---

    OOS: Waiting on Red for the rest.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Tue Jan 06, 2015 4:22 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Starok screams, not only because of the eyebeams searing his armour, but also because he has been deserted by his comrades*

    *He stabs his sword in the floor so that the eyebeams collide with it instead of him, but instead of fighting back, he slumps against the wall, defeated*

    Starok: I... concede... damn you all....

    --------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Micros peeks out of Masaharu's armour, and after seeing that the coast is clear, climbs onto his shoulder*

    Micros: Maybe that's exactly what he's doin'. Who knows what happened to him on that weird star-station?

    Vyrrh: There'll be plenty of time to talk about later, but right now I need Kakamu. Where is he?

    *Arkhite takes a Kanohi Mohtrek off his back, and blows some dust off it*

    --------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Ben takes a notepad out of his pocket, writes a letter, then rips it off and hands it to Tomas*

    Ben: Take this to Kaira. She'll know what to do.

    *Tomas nods, and leaves*

    Ben: If there's someone else out there who can do the things that you do, Quolas, but is wanting to do us harm, then it's no longer safe here. The island must be moved.

    Kakamu: Sorry, did you say move the island?

    Ben: Oh yes. This temple is on an island, and the island must be moved. It must be one of you to turn the wheel, and after that... you can never return.

    --------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Seran's cupboard is blasted apart by the elite's energy weapons, and he falls out. His robes and legs are burned, but the Force gives him the strength to stand up and run. He leaves through the secret doorway that the others have already run through*

    *Heavy pootis-pows one of the guards near JC, and kills another with a critical punch*

    --------------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *The bodies of the deceased passengers, including Golden Flame's, are carried out on makeshift stretchers. Some of the other passengers start digging their graves*

    --------------------------------

    <Unknown location>

    Dukamu: Ah yes, the sixth dimension. This must mean that the sphere is artificial in nature. Perhaps the object that Monarch retrieves will shed some light on its origins.

    --------------------------------

    OOS: Sorry for short post. The original was going to be longer and go into more detail than this, but Opera decided to be a bedge and delete it. Fortunately, I'm back on Chrome now.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Thu Jan 08, 2015 4:01 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout tries to dodge, but the lightning bolt blows part of his leg off*

    *He floats into the air using his density control power, and fires eye-beams at Caiaphus*

    ---

    *OB helps Brawl up, and then starts laughing in Starok's face*

    *Starok suddenly finds himself frozen in a stasis field*

    ---

    *Meanwhile, Barricade and Xintrix hear a knock and a muffled scream coming from the cupboard*

    *The brick wall suddenly explodes, and a terrified-looking Starscream stumbles out, trembling*

    Barricade: Are you alright?

    Starscream: I-I don't like small spaces, okay? I'm a flyer, I need lots of room.

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Ynot: We don't know. Maybe if we find him, we can get it out of him.

    *He picks up the piece of paper, and reads it*

    -----

    <Judoon>

    *Turel is in a ship, orbiting Judoon, when he receives Figlio's message*

    *He immediately leaves for Mordor*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    Aster: No, I turned against them. But thanks.

    *She stands up, and starts calling someone from a phone which Rainn soon realises is his*

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    F-Blackout: I brought you back to life, I get to call you whatever I feel like.

    *He realises exactly what Rahn just said*

    F-Blackout: You're..... getting revenge on someone..... by driving into a bingo lounge? What the hell have you idiots been doing?!

    SB: We tried to buy a car to use for a prison break, and this car salesman tried to con us.

    F-Blackout: A prison break? Are you telling me that one of you got themselves CAUGHT?!

    SB: Three of us, actually.

    F-Blackout: THREE?! THREE OF YOU?!

    SB: What? I wasn't one of them.

    *F-Blackout lies down on the ground and starts laughing hysterically*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *Strika veers away from the gunship*

    Strika: Are you crazy? That guy killed most of my troops all by himself. We'll die instantly.

    *She starts firing lasers at the ship*


    *Von Budberg barks something in his language at the pilot, and he starts to approach Strika and Perseus' ship*

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    *F-Blackout pets Yorke, and carries him away*

    -----


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Thu Jan 08, 2015 12:33 pm

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "He's with some friends investigating a break in or something."

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    D-Klak: "I'll do it, if that's alright with Quolas. I'm not from your universe, so there's no use in me having access to this place."

    *Nadle purses his lips. He knows that it's even more complicated than that. D-Klak wouldn't need access to the time wheel. He's already dead, or at least will be.*

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    JC Denton: *to Heavy* "Thanks."

    *He runs to a hallway with 100% Black chasing him*

    *JC Denton turns around and looks at Black*

    JC Denton: "I have to drop something. Heh heh. Hold on.."

    *He drops a mine that he had stolen from the armory earlier that day. You see, the guards let him roam around for too long, and their hubris limited their foresight. JC Denton took advantage of their lax rules and infiltrated the armory, taking a few mines and the like. It was like poetry.*

    100% Black: "Pretty suspicious!"

    *Black ignores the mine, which beeps as he gets closer. JC Denton runs the opposite way, and into the kitchen. The bomb explodes, and 100% is injured. Somehow, he doesn't die.*

    JC Denton: "Let's move."

    *He runs to the exit, and picks up Mortimer Moloch*

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *The joke characters assemble and start paying their respects in whatever way possible. Some cried, some simply stared, others held the pain. Car Guard and TTT offer their help in burying the dead*

    ---

    <Unknown location>

    The Simurgh: "Verily, my liege."

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus is hit by the eye beams, and yells in pain. He crashes into the ground. His armor is singed, and some of his shoulder has nearly come off. The other wounds on his armor were a sign that the battle was taking a toll on him*

    *He stares up at Blackout, and smiles*

    Caiaphus: "One last hurrah."

    *Using his power of gravity, Caiaphus lifts stones into the air and throws them at Blackout*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot sees phrase in the language of the Riders, and one word in English on it. "Saskana"*

    Axalara: "What does it say?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    *Rainn looks at his pocket, then at his phone. Back to his pocket, then back to his phone. He frowns*

    Rainn: "Who are you calling?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    Anarky: "Two. I don't count."

    Me: Wow. Looks like Malchior IV can handle you people.

    Julio *gets up*: "No they can't! You have to come after us! We're dangerous!"

    Me: Nice try, but no. My friends are going to save the timeline, and I have to help them.

    Rahn: "So you're just going to leave?"

    Me: Not without a warning.

    *Klak lifts the car into the air with gravity, and shoots it with a blast of light. It explodes, sending shrapnel and wheels to the floor*

    Me: Stop attacking people. Understood?

    Rahn: "No, we do what we want! Right, Blackout?"

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *If the lasers hit Budbergs ship, then Mazkertis will stumble a bit*

    *Mazkertis seems to motion for the ship to get even closer*

    Perseus: "Why the hell are they getting closer? Are they going to ram into us?"

    ---

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    Akzer: "*silently growls* RAIGEN! Do you want employment?"


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Sat Jan 10, 2015 2:43 am

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Vyrrh: Oh. He told us to deliver something... a Kanohi Mohtrek. There are few left, so do not lose it.

    *She motions for Arkhite to give Cain the Mohtrek, and he does so*

    *There is a clanging sound from within the ship, and Muta climbs out, fully repaired save for cracks in his armour, followed by Etende*

    Etende: Good thing you had an extra pair of Hydrax circuit boosters or this guy would just be crawling around till we got off-world. Phew.

    *She sits down against the ship and takes a swig from her flask. She notices the new Toa standing in front of her, and her eyes widen*

    Etende: Woah, wait, what? Are you the people Kakamu said were coming?

    Vyrrh: We are indeed.

    Etende: You look like Bob, so that would make you... Toa, right?

    Vyrrh: Correct.

    ----------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    Quolas: I have no objections to your decision, D-Klak. These people have made it quite clear that I am not welcome here, so I will not be returning once our business is done either way.

    Ben: Okay, well, let's not keep it waiting... are we ready to leave?

    Quolas: Something to wear would be nice, if we are to embark on a journey.

    *Ben takes the brown robes from one of the fallen guards, and tosses it to Quolas*

    Ben: Actually I'd rather you stay here, but consider that compensation. I'd like your purple friend here to come alone. Only one of you can turn the wheel, so why would you want to come anyway?

    ----------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Having successfully escaped the ambush in the kitchen, most of the joke characters now find themselves running for dear life down a long metal corridor lit with blue lights. Heavy closes the door behind him, sacrificing his chance of escape so that the others can go free*

    *Doug is near the front, holding onto his cap as he runs, as is Linkara with his bowler hat. Koranis is the first to reach the end of the corridor, and punches the metal door at the end, which has a keypad next to it*

    Koranis: Gah! What is this?

    Doug: It's a keypad, you dip. And we have no idea what the code is...

    *Dr. Pavel comes to a stop behind them, and starts screaming*

    Linkara: Panicking, HMMMM?

    Doug: Calm down doctor, now's not the time for fear! That comes later!

    *Seran, Spanha, Latza and Spoony reach the door as well*

    Spoony: What about your hacker friend? What was his name... JC?

    Paul Latza: Of course! The kind of hacker every gamer should know!

    ----------------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    *Before each body is buried, an unnamed crash survivor invites someone who knew the deceased to share a few words about them. When it is Golden Flame's turn to be buried, he does the same*

    TGWWEIM: Isn't that the guy who was running around with Kranxx earlier? Where is he, anyway?

    CIA: At least you can talk! Who are you?!

    *TGWWEIM is about to say his real name, but Bateman interrupts him*

    Bateman: I met Golden Flame on Tybion before the concert. According to Kranxx, he was a "cheese dealer" - a curious term. Perhaps it describes a new, obscure drug? Regardless, I honour him now by checking these doubles ^

    TTT: no he just rlly likes cheese Smile

    Speaker: Unless anyone objects, we'll bury the deceased now.

    *A grave is dug for Golden Flame, and his body is placed inside. Before anyone can throw soil on it though, there is a bright light next to it and an old, but recognizable figure steps out*

    GregF: I... OBJECT!

    *Everyone gasps, and Greg looks into the grave*

    GregF: Hmm.

    *He jumps into it, turns the corpse over, and starts rummaging around in its clothes*

    Speaker: Good heavens, what are you doing?!

    GregF: Ah-ha.

    *He pulls a silver device covered in liquid mercury out of GF's back, climbs out of the grave, and holds it up for all to see*

    GregF: That is not Golden Flame!

    *Everyone gasps again, and he points at Car Guard*

    GregF: Some time last year, I had heard that someone was driving around Malchior IV masquerading as a powerless Golden Flame. That is why I appeared in the back of this Car Guard's car to investigate. I had a short conversation with him, and while he appeared to be the real thing, I thought I'd better visit the real Golden Flame to make sure. It took a year to track him down, but I eventually found him... in an asylum on the User World.

    *Gasping*

    GregF: That's right. He was once a noble User like me, but when he first found his way into the multiverse, he was driven mad by his newfound powers and had to be contained for his own safety. Do you really think we'd let a User, powers or no powers, wander free among our creations with the knowledge of our secrets and technology?

    *TGWWEIM makes this face*

    GregF: Now, several questions remain unanswered. Who is this shapeshifter? How did he get access to Golden Flame in the first place? Why pose as him for such a long time and deal exotic cheeses to quasimorphs like Kranxx? I'll tell y-

    *The watch on his wrist starts beeping, and he rolls his eyes*

    GregF: Next year. I'll tell you next year.

    *He disappears, and the bystanders look at Goldenn Flame's body in shock*


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Sat Jan 10, 2015 10:42 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout flies into the air to try and avoid the rocks*

    *One of them almost hits him, but he strikes it with a fragmentation blast just in time, blowing it up*

    *Shielding his eyes from the rain of stones coming down after the explosion, he hovers just above Caiaphus, and summons a massive shadow bolt to strike him down*

    ---

    *Starok, still frozen, is carefully lifted up and put on a trolley by three Rahkshi*

    OB: Careful now! I don't want him to get free!

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Ynot: It says "Saskana", and then something in Rider-tongue.

    *He tries to recall what he learned about Rider-tongue millennnia ago*

    ---

    *Turel's ship lands nearby, cloaked*

    *Turel gets out, and starts looking for Uterio*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster shushes Rainn*

    Aster: Hey, Branley. Listen, I have a problem.

    Branley: Like hell you do! I've already gotten a message from Jones; all of us have!

    Aster: He always worked fast.

    Branley: Yeah. If he finds out you called me, I'm as good as dead!

    Aster: Oh, shut up. You know, he never liked you. Why do you think he gave you that dead-end of an assignment?

    Branley: It's not a dead end.....

    Aster: Please. You replaced the deputy program director for a spaceport. You have absolutely no standing left to lose.

    Branley: *sighs* What do you want?

    Aster: Well, it's not hard. I need two tickets off this planet, and I don't want the ZFT to know about it. Deal?

    Branley: *after taking a few seconds to consider* Fine. But make it three tickets. I'll come with you. I want out too.

    Aster: Deal. See you soon.

    *She hangs up, and smiles*

    Aster: Maybe not all of my friends.  

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *F-Blackout gets up, walks up to Anarky, and pokes him in the chest*

    F-Blackout: You. Shut up. You agreed to work for me, so you bloody well count. Is that understood?

    *His berating of Anarky is rudely interrupted by Klak blowing up the car*

    *He turns to Klak, frowning*

    F-Blackout: Didn't the Norman teach you not to interrupt your elders?

    *He walks up to Klak, using his shape-shifting power to make himself slightly taller*

    *He looks down at him, trying to stare him down*

    F-Blackout: They will do what I order them to do.

    *He turns back to the terrorists, and opens a portal to the Bat-Cave*

    F-Blackout: Come on, you idiots. We're leaving. I'm going to teach you all a lesson back home.

    *553 and SB snigger as Yorke starts peeing all over Klak's leg*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *The laser blasts batter the gunship's hull, but only scorch it*

    *The troopers on-board return fire from their turrets, but Strika avoids most of the blasts and silences the turrets with well-aimed laser fire*

    Von Budberg: Vhatevver you vhish to do, mage, do it fast, before they kill us both!

    -----

    <Liquid-Metallicon>

    F-Blackout: Akzer? When can we go?


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Mon Jan 12, 2015 10:49 am

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "What the heck's a Kanohi Mohtrek?"

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *D-Klak puts on the hood of his cloak, and nods at Ben*

    Nadle: "Are you sure about this, D-Klak?"

    Bob: "*whispering* Yeah, it might be a trap."

    D-Klak: "I can't think of any other way to solve this."

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    *JC Denton walks up to the pad*

    JC Denton: "I am prepared to perform my duties."

    *He starts hacking into the keypad*

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    TTT: "a clone?!?!?!? this is instane"

    CIA Guy: "Since he pulled that off, will it double die?"

    Patrick Bateman: "What a twist. *sweats*"

    John Freeman: "We will get the eval boss who is putting science in people and cloning them!"

    *The shocking revelation causes Carrots' green leaves to burst out of his head*

    Pootis-Man: "Oh nooo!!"

    *The Medic jumps out of the wreckage*

    Medic: "HÜÜÜ!"

    *He runs up to Goldenn Flame's corpse with this look on his face, (courtesy of whoever was the one who made it™) and starts stabbing the course with an Ubersaw. He stops, and looks at the joke characters*

    Medic: "Can confirm! It is zhe clone!"

    *Harold places his hands on his temples and frowns*

    Space Ryan Gosling: "You know the story about the Scorpion and the Frog? Looks like your friend's true self didn't leave."

    Car Guard: "What do we do now?!"

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus is hit by the shadow bolt, and loses control of the rocks as he tries to absorb it. The process is painful*

    *A large rock that was about to hit Blackout falls down, and pins Caiaphus to the ground*

    *Caiaphus grunts. The dust settles.*

    Caiaphus: "Bravo, Blackout. *laughs* You have me pinned to the ground, yet you refuse to kill me. You see, this just proves what you said wrong many years ago. You avoided death itself to fight me. You went out of your way for the Makuta who failed, for Nadle's mistake, for the one who created an army of darkness that you helped defeat, for the worm of Omega Supreme. I am a worthy opponent, my friend. You need me, for we both understand something our enemies do not. Zev is tied down by his alliances, and his friends are his weakness. I do not know much of Ynot, but he has the potential to become like us, meaning that he is one step away from becoming everyone's nightmare. Kakamu has a dark past with secrets that can be exploited. And Klak? He is so full of regret that you could snap him like a twig with mere words. His friends can either be manipulated or destroyed. Just look at the Ferret woman that was with him…she seemed to have a magical aura around her that would have made her a wonderful apprentice. Finally, rumors abound of a powerful wolf-like mercenary haunting a few bars. I could go on and on. We will have many challengers, but they all have weaknesses. You and I? We do not cower from our faults. We use them to our advantage, and face them until we overcome them. We are two sides of the same coin: the coin of darkness. You are hesitating to kill me, because you know this to be true."

    *He laughs*

    Caiaphus: “Or perhaps my death will mean that you are the next standard bearer of the shadows, the next true leader of the darkness! Kill me, and you shall be one of my greatest apprentices! Kill me, and Klak will be your equal. *He grunts in pain* I will still be victorious....regardless.....”

    *He starts drifting in and out of consciousness*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Ynot can make out the words "your", "move", and "go"*

    Axalara: "Saskana? Isn't that a planet or something?"

    *Spotter and the others continue trying to wake up D-Klak (4)*

    --

    *Turel sees the ruins of a shuttle in the distance, where Uterio's body rusts in peace* ((Razz))

    Figlio: "*through the comms* I'm inside of Angonce's prison. You may run into some resistance if you just walk towards it. I recommend taking a stealthier approach...unless you want to fight Ynot, TPK, Coro and the Knights of the Keruvim. I believe in you."

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    *Rainn smiles*

    Rainn: "Let's leave this neighborhood before someone calls the police. Pretty soon they'll find out I'm too young to be a teenager. *He winks at Aster*"

    --

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Anarky laughs after the car blows up*

    Anarky: "For now."

    *He walks into the portal*

    Rahn: "You're the best boss ever, F-Blackout!"

    Julio: "Suck-up!"

    *Rahn kicks Julio into the portal, and walks in after him*

    *Klak smiles and cleans off his leg with a wipe that wasn't there before. He calmly picks up Yorke, and starts petting him*

    Me: Cute dog.

    *He hands F-Blackout the dog, and stares up at him*

    Me: Just remember what inspired you to send them. Remember who you're trying to stop.

    *F-Blackout sees F-Klak's eyes where Klak's should be, and F-Klak's smile where Klak's should be*

    --

    <Batcave>

    *A woman wearing a suit and glasses is inside, carrying a notepad. She is also wearing a hardhat.*

    ???: "Figures I'm stuck with the night inspection."

    *Rahn and the others appear*

    Rahn: "Hey, who are you?"

    ???: "Anna Abernathy, Control City Housing Department. We've had some reports that there was some kind of flooding in here. Ma'am, how long have you been an owner of this property?"

    Rahn: "I'm not a woman, and I'm not the owner."

    Anna: "That's not going to get you out of this mess, ma'am."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *Mazkertis nods at Von Budberg, and leaps out of the ship. He lands on Strika's ship, and starts attempting to punch into the cockpit*

    Perseus: "Damn it, shake him off!"

    *"Shake it Off" by Taylor Swift starts playing on the radio for some reason*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Senate Building>

    *That night, President Howard makes his way to Senator Skedaddle's office. He is nearly surrounded by guards*

    *Senator Patr Vazquez walks by carrying a folder*

    Patr: "Ah, Mr. President! Happy to see you."

    *He and Pres. Howard embrace*

    Howard: "Good to see ya too, Senator. What brings you here so late at night?"

    Patr: "Had to pick up something at the office. I wasn't planning on attending it today anyway, but you know..."

    *Howard laughs*

    Howard: "An emergency session is an emergency session!"

    *Patr smiles*

    Patr: "Of course, my friend. Happy New Year. Say hi to the wife and kids for me!"

    Howard: "Thanks! You too. Take care!"

    *He they wave goodbye at each other, and go their separate ways. Patr smiles to himself*

    OOS: Waiting on Red for the rest.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Mon Jan 12, 2015 1:05 pm

    <The Mask's reality distortion>

    Yon dove through the glass window of a posh restaurant with only seconds to spare as a nearby bin was blasted apart by the Tommy gun. Wiseau's maniacal laughter could be heard echoing through the mysteriously empty street outside. As a drop of sweat fell into our Terugan hero's open eye, he realized he was sweating profusely, not a good thing for Terugans as they have no eyelashes to keep the liquid out. He silently cursed as he rubbed his reddened eye, and emptied his pockets to see what he could fight back with. An empty packet of 5 Gum, a can of vanilla coke, his EyePhone, and finally his trademark flintlock pistol fell out onto the floor. He sighed in relief, but cursed when he opened its chamber and found it was devoid of ammunition. As if sensing Yon's frustration, Wiseau began laughing louder as he advanced down the street towards him.

    "What's the matter Yon? Cat got your tongue? Hahahah. Tommy has a present for you!"

    Meanwhile, BONES charged through the door of a convenience store on the other side of the street, hoping to take cover inside. Nearby, See-Man picked up a car with his giant hand and turned it on its side to serve as a shield against Wiseau's bullets.

    "What are you doing, hmm? Come on, come out of there chicken!" Wiseau said as he turned the tommy gun on the car and opened fire. See-Man struggled to keep it up but he knew that it would only be a matter of seconds before the bullets penetrated the vehicle completely, and those extra seconds could be the most important of his life. He let out a cry of anguish, and the Hand gave him a head massage to help him concentrate on the situation at hand. Suddenly, See-Man's eye lit up with an idea, and this theme played. Of course! THE HAND!

    "C'mere boyo!" He said as he grabbed the Hand and posed its fingers to make a V-for-victory sign. While Wiseau's bullets still pounded against his makeshift shield, See-Man took a deep breath, peeked over the top and threw the Hand at the tommy gun with the force of a thousand stickybomb explosions. The Hand went flying through the air, with the two fingers still pointed forward, bang on course with the tommy gun. After a tense moment, the Hand's fingers landed in the eyeballs of the cartoonish face of Wiseau's gun, causing it to scream and explode in a puff of smoke. While Wiseau was momentarily disarmed, See-Man's tense expression changed to that of disproportionate joy, and he pointed at the enemy. He shouted "SEE!!" at the top of lungs, and the Hand decided to get the heck out of there before Wiseau conjured up another gun, scuttling under another nearby car for shelter. See-Man's fist inflated again, and he charged at Wiseau with ridiculous speed and power many times that of Shrek's. The thing is, the Mask is only as observant as its wearer, so when See-Man came at him at incredible speed, Wiseau had no time to brace himself for the attack. When the giant fist of See-Man collided with The Mask, Wiseau was blown backwards into a series of chairs that weren't there before, crashing through each of them before landing on the road with minor friction burns.

    Telepathically sensing See-Man's victory, Yon left his hiding place in the restaurant to join his comrade on the street. When he saw Yon, See-Man pointed to Wiseau and yelled "SEE!" again. Yon signalled for them to run over, and while they did so, Wiseau was already rising to his feet. His carefree demeanour once again changed to that of confused anger as he ran his own fingers down his face and noticed a crack in the Mask.

    "How did that happen?! The Mask is strong!" He muttered.

    "You might have cartoon physics on your side," Yon said as he approached him, "but our friend here was born of GMOD!"

    "SEE!" See-Man shouted in agreement, and charged again. However, this time Wiseau was expecting it, and with the powers of the Mask he grabbed See-Man's finger and lifted him off his feet. The Stouttish hero cried out in surprise as Wiseau used his own momentum against him to spin him round in a circle, faster and faster... until he let go, and See-Man was flung into the horizon.

    Yon's mouth dropped, and Wiseau went back to being his usual confident, airheaded self. "Ahahah, what a story Yon. Looks to me like your See-Man didn't see that coming, huh? Ahahah."

    BONES watched carefully from the convenience store. If not even the wacky physics of Gmod could defeat Wiseau, then what? He turned his attention to the stock on the shelves, looking for anything that could help him against Wiseau and the Mask. He brushed away everything that wouldn't help him, such as cereal, detergent, and lemonade, until he eventually found three things that might... a flashlight, a magnifying glass and a bag of garlic. BONES cackled to himself as he recalled Wiseau's affliction - he was a vampire, yes? Then these should be useful... very useful indeed.

    ------------------------------------------

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *What the other Makuta do not realize is that, just before he was put into stasis, Starok activated his Quick Healing power to ensure that he will be at full health when freed*

    OOS: Feel free to do a time skip from here DRJ, there's nothing much I can do now.

    ------------------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Vyrrh: An artefact that is in short supply, but high demand. You'll see what it does for yourself when Kakamu gets back. Perhaps we should find something to do in the meantime.

    ------------------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Ben shrugs and gives a half-smile*

    Ben: Well, you can choose to doom us all if you want to... I can't make you come along.

    *He takes two torches from the wall, lights them both and hands one to D-Klak. He then exits the room and walks down the corridor*

    Ben: Come with me if you want to live!

    ------------------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Koranis waits next to them with an enraged expression*

    JC Denton: Hacking... hacking... yes...

    *The keypad makes a beeping noise, then bursts open. The metal door swings ajar, but Koranis grabs it, pulls it open and charges past the others. When they look behind the door, they see a docking bay like this one, but absent of ships*

    *An automated message plays over the intercom*

    Intercom: Attention. Gabagool Refuse Collection™ truck inbound, ETA three minutes. All personnel are advised to stand clear of the landing strips. Thank you.

    Spanha: That's our ride!

    *When the prisoners enter the docking bay, they are greeted with the sight of Koranis skilfully slaying the on-site workers with his homemade sword. He jumps between them with remarkable grace for someone bonded with such thick armour, but he manages to strike them down before they can fight or flee nonetheless*

    Seran: I have a feeling that this guy ees going to bee a problem.

    JC Denton: He's just a punk. I'll take care of it.

    ------------------------------------------

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    TGWWEIM: Maybe we should investigate where that explosion came from, over yonder hills. I'm guessing it's the same place as that cyclops-woman... hey, that's another thing. If you're both a cyborg and a cyclops, what does that make you? A cyber-cyclops? Cyclo-borg?

    Pootisman: POOTIS


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Tue Jan 13, 2015 6:49 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout looks down at Caiaphus and scoffs*

    Blackout: I'm not hesitating to do anything. I just wanted you to have a chance to say your last words.

    *He starts preparing a blast of eclipse energy in his hands*

    Blackout: Maybe you're right. You have been a worthy opponent today. But I do not need you.

    *He fires the blast at Caiaphus's head*

    ---

    *Starscream, Barricade, and Xintrix start looking for Ordak*

    ---

    *Starok is taken to a room with a strange vat in it*

    *Another Makuta is already waiting there, and he puts his hands on Starok's chest*

    *The stasis field disappears, but before Starok can assess his surroundings properly, a Rahkshi with a chainsaw walks up to him and cuts his head off, leaving an unsightly hole into which another Rahkshi plugs a wide rubber pipe connected to the vat*

    *The Makuta pulls a lever on the vat, and Starok's antidermis is sucked out of his armour through the pipe and into the vat*

    *They then disconnect the pipe, trapping Starok inside the vat*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Ynot: Yes, I just told you guys that's where Mazkertis was hiding. Weren't you here for that bit? Anyway, I can only understand three words: "your", "move", and "go". It's probably a message from Figlio.

    TPK: That wretch. I shall send my.....*looks at Coro* men after him.

    *He sends a telepathic message to Walternate*

    Ynot: Very well.

    *He teleports them all up to the Cabana Prime*

    ---

    *Turel decides to take a longer, but nevertheless stealthier path*


    *Meanwhile, Black Phantom, IG-88, and Straxus step out of another cave*

    Black Phantom: New target designated Figlio di Armechio. Use lethal force only if absolutely necessary.

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster smiles*

    *She turns, and notices a car behind them, next to the wall*

    Aster: Hmmm.....

    *She shape-shifts her finger into a key, and messes around inside the lock for a moment*

    *Finally, she gets the shape right, and manages to open the car*

    Aster: Gotcha!

    -----

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *F-Blackout turns around just before he enters the portal*

    F-Blackout: Thing is, I'm not trying to stop him. I want to reshape you so that you'll leave him traumatised and angry. You will lose in the end, but he will never forget you.

    *He disappears into the portal, which shuts behind him*

    -----

    <The Bat-Cave>

    *F-Blackout bows his head to Abernathy*

    F-Blackout: Good evening, ma'am. I am the..... legal owner of these wretches. I have the paperwork. Believe me, there is nothing to see here. You can go home.

    *behind him*

    SB: I don't know about you guys, but I'm hungry!

    *He opens the door to the kitchen, and a tide of water suddenly washes over them*

    F-Blackout: Absolutely nothing to see.

    *Frenzy swims out of the kitchen*

    -----

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *Senator Skedaddle has by now fallen asleep in his office*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *Strika punches the radio, and it switches to a classic rock station*

    *She then does a sudden barrel roll, in the hopes that Mazkertis will fall off and into the sea*

    -----

    OOS: Waiting on Red for Liquid-Metallicon, I guess.


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    JS
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by JS on Wed Jan 14, 2015 1:08 pm

    Guf: the treasury of souls. In the religion of Judaism, it is said to be the place where all souls that have be born, are to be born, exist. It is described as being in the seventh heaven, and is, depending on who you ask, positioned beneath either the garden of Eden, or the throne of God himself. In the first telling, souls fall from the tree of souls, and are deposited there. In either telling, it is the responsibility of the angel Gabriel to reach in and take the first soul that touches his hand, before handing it to Lailah, the angel of conception. Because of this, humans are permitted to be born and live.

    Naturally, the reality was slightly different. But perhaps even the wildest myths hold a fragment of truth...

    ---

    February 29, 199X (Lurian Calender)

    Lord Ascheron floated through the expanse, surrounded on all sides by the awe-inspiring glow of the chamber of Guf. The energy was incomprehensible - literally; angelic wavelengths which even his superhuman eyes could only percieve as various shades of red, interrupted only by the souls their-selves; each one seemed to cry out with the voices of every individual it could possibly give rise to, not in a scream, but in a chorus. The pressure was immense - not the physical, but the spiritual and mental pressure. This was not a realm of reality man was ever meant to see; undoubtedly, it was the highest place in the universe.

    "My Lord. Initiate a roll of 25 degrees, then yaw by 37. Accelerate at 15m/s in a 5 second burn."

    "Understood."

    The comm device in Gabriel Ascheron's armor flickered shut, and using the mental interface built into the helmet, he willed the suit's thrusters to complete the maneuvers specified by Altian. Though Guf's reality did not fall within the boundaries of his comprehension, the combined perceptions of Ascheron's incredible will and the raw psychic talent of Altian forced the observable area to conform to *some* level of feasibility; that is to say that Ascheron's entire mission would have been impossible without the precluding two year search for the psychic man.

    "You will soon experience the sensation of gravity, my Lord. Then, you will perceive yourself to be falling into a great body of water."

    Altian was correct. Suddenly Ascheron felt himself being pulled upwards, Guf fading away from beneath him. The helmet of his armor tore away from him as he impacted the water, which filled his lungs as he gasped for breath, accelerating even as the water resitance intensified. His shoulder-length blonde hair shot out from the topknot he had secured it in, trailing behind him. The water resistance began to fade until Ascheron felt air rushing against his face, interspersed by fine droplets of water which he knew to be rain. Perceivable light blinded him momentarily as he realized he was falling through the sky towards a field of green below him. He righted himself, and using the internal gauntlet controls as opposed to the neural interface, activated the wings of light. Blades of light like feathers shot out from Ascheron's backpack, forming a pair of mock angel wings which seemed to generate thrust purely from their surface area; they slowed him down enough for a gentle touch, before fading away.

    He fixed his hair, and wiped the moisture from his face. Gabriel Ascheron wasn't handsome; he was beautiful. There was no other way to put it. Measuring in at just over seven foot of seemingly pure strength, he had a noble demeanor about him that fit his title as Lord Protector of the Nation of Luria. His sharp, purple eyes, fine brow and long, thin nose said more about his status than any crown or scepter could. He turned around, picking his helmet up, and hooking it to his backpack for storage. He surveyed the area, before spotting his destination on the horizon.

    A few minutes of walking in what seemed to be paradise had him there. Golden gates opened like pages of a book to his gentle touch, and then he was in the garden of Eden itself. He pushed in further. Everything that was beautiful seemed to surround him, but he paid such things no heed. What he was looking for was at the center. Two trees stood in an open clearing. An apple hung from each.

    The first step in Human evolution was our genesis, he thought, and the second was original sin. A single bite of the forbidden fruit advanced humanity beyond our original capacity for evolution in an instant. What could two bites do?. He walked towards the tree, and reached to pluck the fruit, his hand wavering centimeters away from the ripe skin.

    "And now you're asking yourself, what about the fruit of life?"

    "Who's there?" He replied, drawing Ascher, the legendary broadsword of the Ascheron line. Glowing blue crystal light seeped out from underneath the intricate detailing of the silver metal which formed the sword, and the entire thing seemed to hum with great power, and potential. Even at nine feet long, the blade was no issue for Lord Ascheron to lift with one hand. A man stepped out from underneath the tree of life; he had dark skin, and wild, unkempt brown hair. He was young, but held about him a maturity and sense of power that belied his age; his sharp jaw was clean-shaven, and two red eyes glared out from underneath a heavy-set brow at Ascheron. He wore a black detective's longcoat over a black suit blazer, with a black waistcoat, dark brown shirt, and green tie. He also wore very dark grey pinstripe trousers, with a golden chain hanging from his belt and leading to his pocket; whilst at first it appeared to be some kind of watch, Ascheron realized the truth as he unhooked the sheath of his katana from it, readying it behind him in an iajutsu stance. The sheath and hilt were simple; black, with black leather for the hilt, and a gold chain worked around the very base of the sheath to link it to his belt.

    "A-Altero!" shouted Ascheron.

    "The greed and inhumanity of the Ascheron family has been the driving cause between every conflict that has been fought within the Republic of Luria in the past two-hundred years." replied Altero, gritting his teeth. "And now you seek to use forbidden and ancient artifacts to extend your sphere of control to the rest of the universe?"

    "I'm doing this for Luria, Altero!"

    "When the government considers itself to be the spirit of its nation, as opposed to the moderators of said spirit, then such things are easy to say. You just want power."

    "And are you any different, Altero? I'm trying to create a new race. A superior, Lurian race, fit to rule the galaxy. Yes, for that power is needed! Would you rather we allow our neighbors to pillage our territories, for godlike beings to destroy as they see fit? How can you accuse me of being evil for wanting power when our own powerlessness is responsible for the hardships we have suffered in the past millennia?"

    "Because you don't care about the wishes of the people of Luria! You seek to advance the ideology of the Ascheron bloodline and instill yourself as universal emperor! You pay no heed to the ideals of Lord Luria Ascheron on which our nation was founded - nonaggression, equality, and liberty!"

    "But I will bring peace to our people! We will live! Forever, and never in fear!"

    "Peace for our people ... I'm sorry, Ascheron. But I can't stomach such a thing if the rest of the universe must burn for it."

    "Then you lack the strength to do what needs to be done as a ruler."

    Altero grit his teeth, and charged, the Katana sliding out of its sheath. "For the preservation of the ideals of Luria!"

    "Altian!"

    At the call of his name, the psychic summoned his energy, pulling Ascheron through the barriers of Eden, through Guf and through the tear in reality that had been created by Ascheron's personal ship, Assault Shadow. Altero's blade cut through nothing but thin air. Ascheron gasped as he materialized within the throne room of his tremendous battle carrier, but quickly collected himself, taking his place in the captain's throne. Altian psychically removed Ascheron's heavy power armor, replacing it with his uniform; white Napoleonic-style robes, decorated with blue and purple silk which ran across his torso from one shoulder.

    "Is the fruit safe?" asked Ascheron.

    "Yes, my Lord. It is in the Ark-Vault."

    Ascheron smiled, then stood up, thrusting his arm out forwards the view-screen at the fore of the throne room. "All Hands! Full speed to Luria." he turned to Altian, who stood beside him, as the ship began to hum with energy, preparing for a hyperspace jump. "Don't worry. I'm sure God would understand the steps we're taking."


    Last edited by Full Frontal on Sun Jan 18, 2015 3:21 am; edited 1 time in total
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Wed Jan 14, 2015 3:02 pm

    OOS: Welcome back, JS!

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus throws the stone pinning him at the eclipse energy blast. The ensuing explosion spreads throughout the area, perhaps even knocking back Blackout. The dust settles, and Caiaphus is nowhere to be seen.*

    Caiaphus: (tp to Blackout) "*weakly* We shall meet again...."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    Lalli Cain: "Klak left nearly half an hour ago. Hopefully, he will return soon."

    *What sounds like a jet airplane approaches the group at an increasing speed*

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *D-Klak grabs the torch, and smiles*

    D-Klak: "Good movie. Nice reference, Kon."

    *He follows Ben*

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    *JC Denton approaches Koranis*

    JC Denton: "Maybe you should try getting a job."

    *Linkara looks at Spanha and Seran*

    Linkara: "Can't we find a nicer ride out of here?"

    Spoony: "Hey, it's cappiocola (gabagool). Besides, it's better than riding in an Uwe Boll movie!"

    *The Critics all look at each other and shout "ZING" before laughing*

    *The non-critics just stare at them. They are confused*

    Paul Latza: "Oh, don't worry non-critics. That's the type of reference every critic should know."

    *Meanwhile, Dr. Bedge is using his prominent Alasaskan expertise to calculate how the group can evenly divide the Gabagool™ between themselves. He whispers his estimates to Dr. Pavel, who nods in agreement*

    Doug: "Wait, why are we just standing here? Shouldn't we help JC and Koranis?"

    Dr. Pavel: "Nothing! We'll do nothing!"

    Dr. Bedge: "It's that simple! They're too big for us."

    --

    *Javert runs up to the area that the Heavy is in*

    ---

    <Meme World, cabin wreckage>

    Hassan-ill-Sabah: "Though we weep for the friends gone, the mystery lasts till dawn."

    Car Guard: "Well, we have to figure out what happened to the real Golden Flame, and who's been tricking us! For all we know, there may be more cyborgs about."

    *The Kind Old Man/Harold nods*

    Hide The Pain Harold: "I agree. We must report any and all suspicious behavior."

    CIA Guy: "A lotta loyalty for hired joke characters!"

    Patrick Bateman: "If any of you try to betray me, I will cut you. My dubs can confirm."

    Hungry-man: "Who cares? Ah'm starving! WE'VE BEEN EATIN' NOTHING BUT BREAD FOR THREE STINKIN' DAYS!"

    *SRG hands Hungry-man one of his 50 chocolates bars, and urges him to shush*

    Carrots: "Where do we begin?"

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Spotter: "How do we know this isn't a trap that Figlio's minions are preparing for us?"

    --

    *Figlio smiles and approaches Angonce's cell*

    *Angonce panics once he sees him*

    Figlio: "How the mighty have fallen. You know, if you hadn't betrayed my father twice, there would have been a place for you at his side. Not that I condone what he did, I'm just pointing out the strategic choice."

    Angonce: "You sophist...you monster..."

    Figlio: "But they never locked me up, did they? Well, not successfully, anyway. *chuckles*"

    Angonce: "Stay away from me, please!"

    Figlio: "Oh, I will, after I use you for one last time. Coro can only distract them for so long. I need a heavy hitter to put Ynot in his place."

    *Figlio notices a piece of glass that had conveniently fallen on the floor. He then raises his arms up to try to break Angonce's enchanted restraints. He fails.*

    Figlio: "Oh pooh."

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    *Rainn sighs and gets in the car*

    Rainn: "I don't approve of this, you know. I mean, what's next, robbing a bank wearing an animal mask?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, bingo>

    *Klak grunts*

    Me: I can't take them alone, and there's far more pressing matter to attend to. Shepherd protect this planet.

    *He flies away. The police arrive a few minutes later*

    ---

    <The Bat-Cave>

    *Ms. Abernathy glances at the mess disapprovingly*

    Anna Abernathy: "Mmmhm."

    *She walks over to Frenzy, and pokes him with her pen*

    Abernathy: "Is that a pet?"

    Julio: "Yes."

    Rahn: "No."

    Abernathy: "In my records I don't see the cave pet permission slip. If you own a cave in or near Control City, you are required to report if you are keeping pets in it. We don't want another Cave Beast Incident to occur again."

    Anarky: "Why is there so much red tape?"

    Abernathy: "Why do you own a cave?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *Sen. Patr Vazquez rushes back*

    Patr: "Hold on, Mr. President."

    *He walks into Senator Skedaddle's office, and grabs his hand, trying to pull him up to wake him up*

    Senator Vazquez: "C'mon, Alan, Howard's coming. Tripartisan wake-up reform should be a thing."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *Mazkertis holds on to a handle on the ship for his dear life. He is hanging by only one arm. He grits his teeth and glares at Strika. Mazkertis tries punching the glass again*


    OOS: Waiting on Red for the rest.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Niflheim on Wed Jan 14, 2015 5:48 pm

    [Unnamed Desert World*]
    The slug, after giving the food to Lord Gaon, went back to his quarters to rest for a while. His job was done for now, but he was still miserable. He looked outside the window of his room, and just sighed.

    The outside of the palace was an impoverish hellhole ghetto: It was full of shambled shacks, ruined buildings from a different time, and overcrowded. The city reeked of decomposing bodies, feces, and cooked garbage from the intense heat. Starvation, malnourishment, abuse, and other similar things were common occurences and memoirs of daily life here.

    The water supply was located under the city, away from the sun to evaporate. However, even in the underground it was no good. Crime was even higher, and the water supply was polluted, constantly dumped with bodies and waste.
    Doug the Slug was tired of living like this. It was time for a change, and he knew just the man to call.

    -----
    In the slums of the city, one of the local rebel leaders was at his market. He was a very nice man to the locals, and constantly gave away free food to others. His appearance in the neighborhood gave inspiration and hope to the rest of the locals. The man's name was Sinjon Wol. To the Royal Family, he was the best sub sandwich maker in the city. To the rest, they knew he was the leader of the Wol Rebels.

    Sinjon was a very average humanoid. He stood around 1.7 meters tall, and somewhat underweight, like most people in the city. He had very dark, nearly black skin, brown eyes, black hair, and a large beard. He wore a dark tan turban with orange and rust-red robes, worn down from the sandstorms of the city. He carried a large scimitar, a kirpan, and a rifle was hidden under his cloak. One could only guess he was a practicing Sikh, a rarity in this time and world.

    Enough with appearances, though. Sinjon was just doing his daily job of making food for the locals, cutting vegetables and fruits, baking bread, and having dried meat in the back. Due to his rebel cause, he was able to scavenge and find enough parts to construct a freezer and other appliances.

    Then his messenger device dinged. He told his assistant, Rahat, to take over for a bit. He went to the backroom to answer.
    "Hello?"
    "Sinjon, it's me, Doug."
    Sinjon froze for a bit. He couldn't believe it.
    "Ah yes, Doug. The traitor who decided to work for the corrupt fatass leader! To what do I owe the pleasure?!"
    "I don't care about your opinion on me. But what I do care about is ending this."
    "The almighty slug, working for Gaon, and telling me he wants to help? Nice try."
    "Do or don't believe me. But I have plans to the whole palace. I know how to kill Gaon. What I need is for you to storm the palace tomorrow."
    "Tomorrow? Are you crazy?! I can't assemble the whole army tomorrow, Doug."
    "Gaon is dead tomorrow, with or without your help. You can trust me on that."
    He paused for a moment. What if he was telling the truth? What if Gaon was going to die tomorrow? Somebody from his guard, or one of his idiotic daughters would take over, shadowed by one of Gaon's friends. It was tomorrow or never.
    "I promise nothing but help if you aren't lying, Doug."
    "Thanks, Sinjon."
    Doug then turned off the messenger and went back to refill Gaon's belly.
    -----
    *Retconned to Rhadan
    -----
    [Meme World, Orbit]
    The Ayy-Lmaliums had lost contact with the Dong Squad. The medical status of the members they could analyze on the surface were all unconscious. The strange energy readings nearby made it a hot-zone if they dropped off any Ayy-lmaliums off there.

    "We have to contact Lord Zrintch."
    "But, sir, we'd give away our position! We're on stealth mode, sending out a signal that far away..."
    "It matters not. This is worst than the last mission. That energy reading defies any of our instruments, meaning it's most likely The Mask at work."
    "ok"
    The ayy-lmaliums flipped the switch and inputted Zrintch's digits to contact him. Zrintch answered immediately.

    "What's the problem, Ayy?"
    "We've lost contact with all the Dong Squad. The members we can locate are unconscious, or dead. The energy readings nearby their bodies makes me think The Mask is already in use."
    "Hmm. This creates a problem. Right now we're on our way to extract our members from Dekan, which is being orbital bombarded."
    "Dekan? Bombarded?! Why? I thought that location was far off the maps!"
    "Intel says it's not from our enemies, but from a random faction who has no reason behind it. Simply put this was random, not targeted. Either way, we're still getting our agents out of there."
    "This complicates things. Are you saying you can't send back-up?"
    "You'd have to wait. Which sounds like a problem. So yes, that's exactly what I'm saying."
    "oh"

    Ayy then hung up, sighed, then facepalmed.
    "I guess that means we're on our own, huh?"
    "F#ck u"
    "Hey, Ayy, it seems that another ship crashed."
    "What?! How did they get through without us noticing?"
    "Probably a portal or something."
    "It matters not. Contact them. They're possibly our only hope to rescue the Dongers."

    -----
    [The Mask's Reality]
    Yon was devastated. He just lost mental link with See-Man, implying that he is, indeed, dead. Two dongers down in a span of 15 minutes was insane. He wasn't sure what to do.

    "What's with the frown, Yon? I thought you were going to beat me? Haha. Give up now, Yon, and I'll bring everyone back."

    Yon thought for a second, devastated over his losses already. He then looked up and then stared at Tommy, with one eye: "No"

    "Tsk tsk tsk, wrong answer, Yon." Wiseau phased his gun out and then dashed to Yon. He gave him one single uppercut, knocking him to the ground. Wiseau lifted him back up and began rapidly punching him. "Well, Yon? Ready to give up yet?! HUH?!"
    Yon continued to attempt to block the punches, but it was too fast. He was being beaten senselessly with little effort.
    "No."
    "AHHHHHH!!!!!" Tommy's scream echoed through the dimension, alerting the rest of the Dongers. He flung his right hand straight through Yon's eye.

    Meanwhile, BONES was throwing together the things he found to attempt to kill Wiseau. BONES had located The Hand to help him, and the Hand had attached the garlic to a homemade bomb, using a water bottle and some dry ice, both located in the store. BONES had broken a broom and tapped the magnifying glass at the end, and the flashlight by the back. BONES then hooked on a large paperclip and a handle to hold his contraption as some sort of gun.

    The Hand and BONES then went outside to combat Wiseau, only to notice what had happened. Wiseau had put his fist right through Yon's eye. Almost comically, Yon had an X in his eyes and his tongue hanging out, laying on the floor.

    "You monster! And I'm the one that's a skeleton!"
    "Well, you know, skeletons aren't exactly evil in slavic mythology."
    "Yeah, yeah, like I need to hear that from the vampire who just killed 3 people like nothing."
    "I can bring them back, BONES. Hopefully you're not as stubborn as Yon. Just give up and live here. The rest of the universe can't affect us here."
    "You're right, Wiseau. I concede. You win." BONES dropped his weapon and held his hands up. He then got on his knees and put his hands behind his helmet.
    "See? Not so hard. Now let's get rid of this scenery and get back to home." Tommy completed cleared the area of San Francisco, and instead switched it to a large mansion. He then gathered up the remains of the other 3.
    Suddenly, out of nowhere, The Hand latched onto his face. He had strapped the garlic bomb to his hand itself.

    "Argh! What the F#ck is this, man?! You prick! You betrayed me!"
    "HAND! NO!!! STOP!!!"
    The hand then gave a thumbs up "Yeah" to BONES, before pressing the trigger on the bomb, blowing itself up with the garlic.
    The explosion pushed BONES back and annihilated Wiseau's face. The Mask had fallen off Wiseau's face, as he lost concentration and meaning to use it.
    "IT'S BOOLSHEET, IT'S ALL BOOLSHEET!" Wiseau was crawling around, covering his face with his hand, and the other attempting to pick up the Mask. The skin had been blown off his face, along with a lot of the rest of his upper body. If it wasn't for the fact they were away from the Sun and in the dark, he probably would've been dead.

    BONES had gotten up, the death of Hand was basically nothing to him at this point. He scrambled to find his make-shift light-ray weapon, which was still there. He then picked it up and turned on the flashlight, aiming it at Wiseau. He began screaming and burning.

    "BASTARD! YOU CAN'T KILL ME THAT EASILY!" Wiseau then grew giant bat wings from his back, ripping out of his suit and flesh, scoured and burn, with chunks flown around. He then dashed towards the source of the light, knocking BONES straight to the wall.

    "Balls to the walls, they say!" He broke the light-ray, and then scrambled around to find The Mask. "Not now, not like this!" he shouted.

    BONES had been knocked so hard into the wall, he created a hole of rocks. Part of his suit had been broken, and his visor had shattered almost completely. BONES smiled, and removed his helmet. He then took the rest of the astronaut suit off.

    Tommy then found The Mask and shoved it onto his face. It engorged itself on Tommy's flesh, making him scream. it implanted itself all around the missing skin, making his face completely green. It then healed the rest of the wounds on the body.

    This theme then began to play as Tommy and BONES faced each other, BONES laughing randomly. The two then began to clash, a fury of punches, kicks, and improvised weapons. Tommy was generating hammers, gun, paddlesticks, and other wacky weapons out of thin air because of The Mask. BONES, however, was unattaching parts of himself and flinging them around at him. The fight echoed through the chambers of the volcano, clash of titans.
    -----


    Last edited by Niflheim on Thu Jan 15, 2015 11:35 am; edited 1 time in total
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Thu Jan 15, 2015 4:45 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Starok telepathically implants a message in the nearby Makuta's minds*

    Starok (tp): You will pay with your lives for what you've done. When Mata Nui returns, I shall stand by his side as the one, the true, Makuta...

    *He then enters a period of hibernation inside the vat*

    ------------------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, near Lalli's ship>

    *The others look to the skies, and Micros crawls inside Masaharu's armour again*

    Micros: Can't a Stelcro like me just get some peace sometime?!

    ------------------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    Ben: What did you call me?

    *The two walk up a set of stairs, take a left, a right, go through a hidden doorway, and eventually make it to the surface. They find themselves surrounded by trees and foliage from every angle, with sunlight breaking through the treetops. Ben raises an eyebrow and puts out his torch*

    Ben: That's odd... I thought it would be night-time by now. Guess time flies when you're having fun, huh... follow me...

    *Their journey across the island continues for several hours, with them only stopping once to drink a flask of water each and eat some bread. Eventually, they make it to something called the "Orchid", which is actually a cluster of greenhouses. Ben stands up against a shelf in one, and signals D-Klak to stand beside him. He does so, and the floor they stand on descends into the ground, taking them with it. When they reach the level below in the secret elevator, Ben steps out, takes a coat from a nearby wall, puts it on and zips it up*

    Ben: It's about to get a little chilly in here.

    ------------------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    Koranis: Stay out of my way, human.

    *The others observe the Gabagool refuse collection hovertruck back into the hangar through the energy shield. It parks, and the driver steps out. When he sees the critics and joke characters, all still wearing their prison jumpsuits, he screams and runs away*

    *Koranis runs over to the truck, climbs in the pilot's seat and starts pressing every button available*

    *JC runs after him, grabs him and throws him out of the truck*

    JC Denton: I'm UNATCO. Ex-UNATCO.

    *Koranis shouts a battle cry, pulls out his sword and slashes JC's legs with it. He falls to the ground and makes an "urgh" sound*

    *Seran uses the Force to open the back of the truck and lift all of the empty garbage cans out*

    Seran: Get een the cans or get een the truck, people!

    *Koranis gets back in the driver's seat, and now that he is out of the way, Doug runs over to a crawling JC*

    Doug: Oh jeez, your legs are almost torn in half! We need to get you to a doct-

    *JC suddenly stands up to talk to Doug*

    JC: I am prepared to perform my duties.

    *He then falls down again, and starts crawling towards the back of the ship*

    ------------------------------------------

    OOS: Will respond to Nif and FF later. Waiting on Red for Archon-7


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Thu Jan 15, 2015 5:36 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Blackout sadly smiles*

    Blackout: No. We won't.

    *He teleports away, and reappears in front of Barricade and Xintrix*

    Blackout: Come on, guys. We're going back up to the ship.

    Xintrix: But, we were looking for this one guy.....

    Blackout: We got what we came for, Xintrix.

    *Xintrix sighs*

    *The four Makuta teleport back to the Pale Fire*

    -----

    <The Cabana Prime>

    Ynot: Okay, were you guys even here? I have a reliable source. Mazkertis is on Saskana. End of.

    *He looks around*

    Ynot: Where's Sasuken?

    *As if on cue, Sasuken walks in*

    Ynot: Hey, just in time. We're going to Saskana.

    *Sasuken silently gets behind the navigation console*

    *Ynot turns to TPK and Coro*

    Ynot: Watch this.

    *The Cabana disappears in a flash of light.....*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *..... and reappears near Saskana, now in the form of a giant pumpkin*

    *On board, the entire crew and passengers are wearing Halloween costumes from this list*

    *TPK looks down at his costume and growls*

    TPK: Are you kidding me?

    Ynot: No, no.

    *The ship returns to normal and the costumes are revoked*

    ---

    *The glass begins to crack*

    *Strika suddenly swings the ship to the left, hoping to shake Mazkertis off*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    *Turel cautiously enters the prison*

    Turel: You called for me, Generalissimo?


    *However, he doesn't realise IG-88 has been watching him the whole time, using a cloaking device to remain undetected*

    *He sends a brief signal to the other droids*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster wags her finger at Rainn*

    Aster: Now, you wanted to torture people back on Earth, so you don't get to complain about me stealing a car.

    *She starts the car, and drives off*

    -----

    <The Bat-Cave>

    F-Blackout: Now, ma'am, I can explain. That robot isn't a pet. As you can see, it's obviously a type-9 semi-humanoid robot. Nobody would ever have a type-9 semi-humanoid robot as a pet! That robot is our, er, servant. Yes, our servant. That man *points at Julio* is merely an idiot. Will that be all, or will you waste more of our time with imaginary problems?

    -----

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *Alan wakes up, and laughs at Patr's joke*

    Alan: Hah. Thanks.

    *He opens his drawer, and takes out a thick folder*

    -----

    <User HQ>

    *User JS walks out of a prison building*

    *A BZP admin waves him goodbye*

    Makaru: Don't get in trouble again, JS.

    User JS/Full Frontal: Don't worry, I won't.

    OOS: He's all yours now, mate.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Thu Jan 15, 2015 5:56 pm

    <Meme World, Near Wiseau's Location>

    *The Memes Kid had left with his friends just as The Tri-Daleli Lasangamas of LMAO-Prime scanned the area. He frowned as he thought the battle was lost. No more memes.*

    Reddit Alien: "Did you hear that?!"

    King Harkinian: "OAH!"

    LeTrole Rusemann Trollface : "Gay as heck, haha"

    *The Memes Kid smiled, and ran back to the volcano with the others to witness BONES' battle with Tommy. The Heckler silently follows them, as the amount of hecks being given by them was too high*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, near Lalli's ship>

    *Klak is revealed to be the source of the sound. He lands next to everyone*

    Me: Sorry, I had car trouble. I'm Makuta Klak.

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *D-Klak says nothing as his arms press into his body in an attempt to survive the cold*

    --

    *Nadle rubs his chin, and turns to Quolas*

    Nadle: "I have a conjecture I want to run by you. Klak informed me that you had fought against us in the Uterio War because it was a fixed event in time. However, the fact that we are attempting to stop Mazkertis proves that details of these events, minor or major, are changeable. Now, suppose Mazkertis succeeds. The Uterio War will still have happened, it just would have been longer and deadlier. Am I right, or am I wrong?"

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    Linkara: "Trouble walking, HMM?"

    *He and the other Critics get onto the ship. Dr. Bedge panics, but is calmed down by Pavel, who also gets on. Mortimer Molech snuggles into the Gabagool™*

    Dr. Pavel: "Who are we missing?"

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus emerges from a portal, and watches the Pale Fire leave while clutching his arm*

    ---

    <The Cabana Prime>

    *D-Klak (4) and the others are forever scarred with the image of Coro wearing a sexy Darth Vader costume*

    Coro: "What in the...?"

    D-Klak (4): "Infinite probability drive, I've heard of that. Didn't think it actually worked."

    Axalara: "We should never discuss this again."

    *Cutter nods*

    Spotter: "Yep."

    Moe: "Agreed."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    *Mazkertis loses his grip and falls off*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    *Figlio is about to punch the person who said his name when he realizes that it is Turel*

    Figlio: "Oh, thank goodness, Turel. You startled me. Were my enemies outside?"

    *He widens his eyes after saying this picks up the shard of glass*

    Figlio: "They're there, aren't they? I knew Coro wouldn't last long."

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    *Rainn growls*

    Rainn: "You win this one."

    ---

    <The Bat-Cave>

    Anna Abernathy: "How many idiots do you have in your possession?"

    Julio: "I'm pretty sure robots count as pets."

    Rahn: "Now that's just robotist."

    Julio: "Is not!"

    Rahn: "Is to!"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *Patr leaves. A minute later, the President walks in with his guards*

    President Howard: "Senator Skedaddle, so good to see you! I trust you have been well?"

    *He reaches out his arm to shake Alan's hand*

    ---

    <User HQ>

    *User MK walks up to User JS*

    User MK: Hello! Welcome back!


    Last edited by Klak on Wed Nov 18, 2015 6:57 pm; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by JS on Fri Jan 16, 2015 5:37 am

    <User HQ>

    User JS: Thank you, MK... It's good to be back, though I will say that one does not care to acknowledge the mistakes of one's youth. And as such, I must evolve beyond what I am now...

    *He turns to MK, and strikes this pose. His body begins to glow with energy, which subsides to reveal his new form. MK struggles against the wave of energy emerging from JS's body as a result of such fabulous posing and incredible hair. The power eventually subsides and JS returns to a neutral pose, adjusting his glasses with his middle finger*

    User JS: Suffice to say, with the dishonor that clouds my old identity, I can no longer remain as I once was... Therefore-!

    *He spins around 180, then twists his torso and head to the side enough to look at MK, and point at him with arm outstretched*

    User JS: Know this! The day you said "Welcome Back" to JS was the last day he ever lived! The man you knew as JS has become--! Space-! Pirate-! Captaaa~aain-!

    *He turned back to face MK, his finger shooting up to the sky. Some more of the energy from his transformation burst forth from the finger, tearing open a portal above into a realm of pure light, which illuminated him heroically*

    User JS: EUUROOBEEAAT!

    *He sighed, as the portal collapsed, and he flopped to the floor.*

    Captain Eurobeat: Gee, that really... takes it out of you. Easy enough when you're writing it, but doing it yourself is certainly... something else...
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:06 am

    <The Assault Shadow>

    "God, perhaps, but the guardians of time digress."

    These sudden words could be heard throughout the throne room of the Lurian ship. Most, if not all, of the crewmembers present turned to face its source. Three monk-like figures stood in front of the exit, their hoods obscuring their faces. Each of their robes was a different colour; red, green and purple, with the green-robed monk stood in the middle. After a moment, he stepped forward, removing his hood so that the Lurians could see his face. Surprisingly, his skin was also a shade of green, but much paler than the robes he wore. His skin bore a resemblance to that of a patchwork quilt, with it appearing to be sewn together in places, and decorated with various alien symbols which glowed bright orange. There appeared to be a bright light under his skin, as it could be seen glowing within him. He looked right, then left, then straight ahead to Lord Ascheron. Grimacing, the stranger pointed a greenish, accusatory finger at the Lord, and with his other hand, he gripped the hilt of an intricately crafted sword attached to his belt.

    "Gabriel Ascheron. I am Vexull Vyntoc of the Sha'lythe Sect. Return the fruit to whence it came, so that we may repair the breach you have created, or else you will face the total eradication of your timeline..."

    Vexull's two companions then drew their swords and charged them with elemental power. The red monk's sword was ignited with flame, and the purple's crackled with electricity.

    He paused to acknowledge this, then finished his sentence. "...Over your fallen corpse."

    ------------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, near Lalli's ship>

    Vyrrh: MAKUTA!

    *She hurls one of her prongs at Klak, which attaches around his right shoulder and gives him an electric shock*

    *Arkhite winces, and grabs her other prong before she can throw it*

    Arkhite: No, no that's Klak! Kakamu told you about him, remember?

    Vyrrh: I... oh...

    *Using her powers, she absorbs the lightning energy still present in the fork and walks over to take it off his shoulder*

    Vyrrh: I apologise... Klak... but you shouldn't surprise us like that. I am Vyrrh, a Toa sent by Kakamu to help you.

    Arkhite: I'm gonna apologize as well for my friend's rude behaviour. It's been a long day.

    ------------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Ben leads D-Klak into a large hole in the metal wall of the underground station. Beyond the hole is a ledge, and below the ledge is a frozen chamber with the wheel embedded in the wall. Without warning, Ben pushes D-Klak off the ledge and into the chamber*

    Ben: You're gonna have to take it alone from here. Push it to the right, we end up in the future, push it to the left, we end up in the past. One rung is... 5 years, give or take.

    *He then starts to walk away, but turns back to say one final thing*

    Ben: Oh, by the way, Tunisia's lovely this time of year.

    *He leaves*

    -----

    Quolas: The actual period of fighting you know as the Uterio War would still have happened, yes, but there is a near-infinite amount of possibilities regarding its exact circumstances which could change. As it is Mazkertis we are talking about changing the timeline, it is possible that many of us would have been killed by him before the war even began.

    ------------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Spanha jumps in, and furiously chomps her way through some of the leftover trash covering the floor of the ship*

    Seran: Please don't do that.

    *He climbs into the back of the ship next to her. JC Denton also crawls up and in, and closes the hatch just before Koranis slams the pedal into the floor. The ship's engines power up, and it is launched out of the hangar and into space*

    Seran: I hope that's everyone.

    *JC Denton sees Spanha eat a chocolate bar, so he zaps her with a taser-prod. She coughes it up and freezes, giving him a window of opportunity to eat it himself*

    JC: It's good to see that at the end of the day, our work pays off.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by JS on Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:07 am

    <The Assault Shadow>

    Ascheron sighed, his hands forming a steeple. Next to him, Altian took up a defensive position, his hands creating a psychic field between Ascheron and his attackers.

    "Enough, Altian. I will deal with this incursion myself."

    He stood up, the barrier dissipating.

    "O-Of course, My Lord. I'll retrieve your armou-"

    "No."

    "My Lord?"

    Ascheron cracked his knuckles, grimacing.

    "Broadcast this battle to the entire ship. Have it sent to the homeland. Let all enemies of the Republic know what happens to those that defy us."

    "...Yes, My Lord."

    Altian retreated from the throne, and the command crew disappeared, exiting in an orderly fashion. Ascheron descended the steps leading up to the throne, stopping half way, and settling into a stance.

    "I, too, am trying to repair a breach. A breach that my people have fallen through. That breach is weakness, and as a result of our weakness, we have been denied our own destiny. The fruit is an end to all that. If you feel that your mission is more important, then come at me. The fact of which of us is stronger will decide the future. That... is the only truth in this world."
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Fri Jan 16, 2015 9:39 am

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *The Pale Fire warps away*

    -----

    <Saskana>

    *The Cabana Prime approaches the planet, but their way is blocked by a squadron of Dominion fighters*

    TPK: The welcoming committee. I was wondering why they hadn't arrived yet.

    *The squadron leader sends a message to the Cabana*

    Commander Conway: To the unidentified vessel. You have entered the system without clearly identifying yourselves. Identify yourselves now or depart.

    Ynot: Commander, this is Makuta Ynot, of the Cabana Prime. Commander, inform your superiors that they have inadvertently taken in a dangerous fugitive by the name of Mazkertis. Surrender him to us so that we may return him to prison, and we will depart.

    Sasuken: What are you doing? We can't hold this guy!

    Ynot: Sshhhh!

    *They wait while Conway contacts his superiors on the ground*

    ---

    *Strika lets out a sigh of relief*

    Strika: Let's hope he drowned.

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Turel: I didn't see anyone, sir.

    *He looks at Angonce*

    Turel: It's been a long time, Great Being.

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster drives towards the Spaceport*

    -----

    <The Bat-Cave>

    F-Blackout: Well, there's Shadow Blade, 553, Rahn, the anarchist, and what's his face.

    SB: You mean Julio?

    F-Blackout: Oh, is that his name? So yeah, that makes five idiots. I don't need an idiot permission slip, do I?

    -----

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *Alan eagerly shakes the President's hand*

    Alan: Excellent, most excellent! How's your wife, Mr. President?

    *Without waiting for the answer, he sits down and slaps the file*

    Alan: So, let's get down to businesd. You know, I got some most disturbing documents in the mail recently! They were addressed to me and to seven major newspapers and net feeds. Would you like to see them?


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Fri Jan 16, 2015 4:29 pm

    <User HQ>

    *User MK is in awe of Captain Eurobeats, and faints~~*

    ---

    <Malchior IV, near Lalli's ship>

    *Klak is shocked by the electricity, and his armor has a clear burn mark on its shoulder. After Vyrrh introduces herself, he seems to grit his teeth. He then calms down*

    Me: It's fine, I've had a rather emotional day myself. A word of advice, though. Always be aware of your surroundings. Anyway, what are your names?

    Lalli Cain: "*whispers to Micros* That electric one is a bit of a hothead, eh?"

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    D-Klak: "Oh, how fun."

    *D-Klak turns the wheel*

    --

    *The gears of Nadle's mind begin to turn. He seems to silently gasp, as he realizes something about the future. Sure, he did not expect the future to change from what it would supposedly be, but what if....?*

    Nadle: "No....no...."

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    Doug: "You can say that again, JC!"

    *Dr. Bedge smiles*

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    Caiaphus: "HEAR ME, SECOND BROTHERHOOD! ASSEMBLE!"

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Coro: "Just in case....are their ships running on machines, or magic?"

    --

    Perseus: "Let's get rid of the others, too! The-"

    *Just as Perseus is about to continue, he feels something entering his mind. The same thing happens to Strika.*

    Mazkertis: "(tp) Not so fast."

    *He floats up to the ship, propelling himself with magical energy, and fires a volley of magic blasts at it*

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Figlio: "That's a relief."

    Angonce: "Hello, traitor. I see siding with one devil wasn't enough for you."

    Figlio: "I see you've regained your composure after so long, Angonce. You're still a little crazy, but you've got a mouth on you. I like it. Turel, what do you say we reward him by giving him an early release?"

    *He grins*

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    *Rainn sits still*

    ---

    <The Bat-Cave>

    Anarky: "I'm actually the smartest person here."

    Rahn: "I am not an idiot! The only idiot here is Frenzy! He can't even talk!"

    Anna: "He's right, that's no way to talk to your daughter, sir."

    Rahn: "His what?"

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *President Howard rolls his eyes*

    President Howard: "Sure, Senator. I'm prepared for this. Everyone makes plenty of rumors about me. No offense, but lots of them come from your side."

    OOS: Waiting on Red for the rest.


    Last edited by Klak on Sat Jan 17, 2015 1:48 pm; edited 1 time in total


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by JS on Sat Jan 17, 2015 3:37 am

    <Captain Eurobeat's Ship, Night of Fire, which he has mysteriously appeared aboard>

    *The ship resembles a WWII-style naval battle-cruiser, with the addition of a large thruster array at the rear, as well as a mass-accelerator cannon running through the length of the hull. Guns are mounted not just on her deck but on the sides of the hull, and positioned on the sides, but in line with the bridge tower, are two coffin-shaped compartments, pointing outwards. These give the ship a "wingspan" equivalent to half its length, and the four large hatches present on the fore and rear of both of them suggest they are the ship's hangars. A large, circular ring of metal runs around the ship, connected to it at either side at the tips of these hangars; this ring was the ship's FTL propulsion system. The entire ship was painted a dark red, and featured the Initial D logo emblazoned on either side of the hull, for sponsorship, and because it was awesome*

    *Captain Eurobeat sat on the bridge of the Night of Fire, grinning. He stood up, and pointed dramatically towards the view screen."

    Eurobeat: Engage!

    *One of the bridge officers sighed, and spun her seat around to face Captain Eurobeat behind her. She was no older than twenty, with neck length blonde hair, through which a red bandanna was tied. She wore the same uniform as Captain Eurobeat, but with black leggings as opposed to red, and a black undershirt, with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows*

    Lt. Parrish: Sir... I've told you this five times already. The v-NRG drive has not been installed yet.  

    Eurobeat: but why leslie. answer that.

    *Leslie sighed*

    Leslie: It's just a matter of time, sir. The ship's brand new. They're still wiring it up.

    Eurobeat: does the kitchen work.

    Leslie: Yes, Sir.

    Eurobeat: and the disco.

    Leslie: There isn't a disco, Sir.

    *Captain Eurobeat frowned*

    Eurobeat: That's a pretty serious issue, Lieutenant. How can we rectify it?

    Leslie: I... I don't know, Sir. We could make room for one by removing an existing facility?

    Eurobeat: maybe your quarters > : D

    Leslie: But then... where would I sleep?

    Eurobeat: > : D

    *Leslie pulled a pair of P90s out from under her control console, and sprayed towards Eurobeat with both. He screamed girlishly, and flipped over the back of his chair, huddling behind it to escape from the fire.*

    Eurobeat: oh please oh please stop i have forsaken my wicked ways i am a changed man pleeeeeaassee plz plz plz plz plz plz

    Leslie: You're a bloody pervert, that's what you are!

    *The guns ran dry, and she discarded them. She turned back to her control console.*

    Leslie: Oh, look, the v-NRG Drive's online.

    *Eurobeat stood up, collecting himself*

    Eurobeat: Excellent... Now, set course for Malchior IV!

    *He resumed his earlier dramatic pose, pointing to the fore of the bridge*

    Eurobeat: All Systems! Engage!

    *The ship glew with a red light for a moment before disappearing*
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Kon on Sat Jan 17, 2015 3:56 am

    <The Assault Shadow>

    Vexull turned to his companions for input, but neither of them were willing to share their opinion. Disappointed, he slowly pivoted on the spot, scanning the room for some kind of camera or recording device that the people of Luria would be looking through. He did not find any, so he addressed Ascheron himself as Luria.

    "We have no quarrel with your people. History has told that the Lurians are a race to behold... but compared to the creators, you are but children... and your empire is a sandcastle on the vast beach of the infinite. The artefact you have stolen can be compared to the moon, that will cause the sea to wash the castle away if put in the right place. If your people are destined to survive, you will find another solution."

    It was then that one of Vexull's companions spoke, specifically, the one in violet. "But sir... the very young do not always do as they are told."

    Vexull nodded, and furrowed his brow. "As it would seem."

    ------------------------------------

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Arkhite points to himself, then to Ikhet and Nohex*

    Arkhite: Arkhite, Ikhet, Nohex. Ikhet can't speak, and Nohex is just... weird...

    ------------------------------------

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *As D-Klak struggles against the wheel, breaking the ice and slowly turning it on its axis, the chamber he is in floods with a blinding, white light. He feels his form fading away, and the ground shake beneath him. He hears a ringing sound in his ears, and he is lifted off his feet, vanishing completely and reappearing... somewhere else*

    *As Ben takes the lift back up to the surface, he hears the same ringing and shields his eyes from the same light - as do Quolas, Kakamu, Nadle, and everyone else on the island*

    Kakamu: What's happening?!

    Quolas: D-Klak has activated the anomaly! We are moving through ti-

    *The light explodes, covering everyone and everything for a brief moment. When it passes, everyone finds themselves on the floor, with their surroundings looking considerably... newer*

    Kakamu: Argh... that sound... my body...

    *Kakamu forces his biometal body to stop vibrating with his shapeshifting power, before it falls apart completely. Quolas stands up, and notices a drop of blood fall from his ear*

    Quolas: It's over. Now to find the human Linus.

    *He lifts up one of the unconscious humans nearby, and shakes him awake*

    Marco: Ah... ah, woah, okay, don't kill me!

    Quolas: Where is the time wheel?

    Marco: It's in the orchid, on the other side of the island-

    Quolas: Take us there.

    *Quolas drops him on his feet, and Marco backs away against the wall, still afraid but ready to lead them out if necessary. Quolas helps Bob to his feet*

    Quolas: Bob, my friend. Are you well?

    *Kakamu offers a hand to help Nadle up as well*

    ------------------------------------

    <Tunisia>

    *D-Klak finds himself on his back in an expanse of sand. He still hears the ringing, though it grows quieter with every second that passes. He shields his eyes from the heat of the sun above him, and eventually the ringing sound is replaced by incoherent shouting. As it gets closer, he observes two men on horseback approach him, dismount, and aim AK-47s at him*

    ???: Name!

    ------------------------------------

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus' telepathic summons reaches far and wide, but nobody responds... not even Starok. Kulnak is a traitor and has left this dimension. Kivalon is injured and needs time to heal. Ordak has fled in fear of being executed, and Starok himself is imprisoned in a vat of the substance he hates the most. That leaves only one. Only one...*

    *There is a flash of purple, and Xikella appears at Caiaphus' side*

    Xikella: I am here, my lord. Starok has failed.

    ------------------------------------

    <Supermax 282>

    *Spanha spasms for a few moments, but once she recovers, she jumps up and kicks one of JC's wounded legs*

    Spanha: Don't ever do that again!

    JC Denton: I'm gonna need a medkit.

    *Spanha eats one of his shoes in revenge*

    JC Denton: I'm gonna need a medkit.

    Linkara: So, where are we going, HMMMM?

    Seran: I don't theenk eet's up to us. Wherever Koranis ees going, I guess.

    *Seran pulls back the hatch at the back of the cockpit, so he can see Koranis*

    Seran: Excuse me, where are we going?

    *Koranis growls*

    Koranis: You're still here?

    *He starts pressing a lot of the buttons on the dashboard, and ends up pressing one that unlocks the airtight skip the joke characters and critics are sitting in from the rest of the ship, so it floats off into space*

    Seran: Oh, sheet.

    JC Denton: You're gonna need a medkit.


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by JS on Sat Jan 17, 2015 11:29 am

    <Lurian capital city, Kazan>

    Altero pulled his hat closer to his head, and sped through the snowed-out city. Whilst the broadcast hadn't caused panic, the entire populace was certainly on edge. He glimpsed up at one of the many advertising displays lining the walls of buildings, which looked entirely out of place in the city which, otherwise, resembled a slightly taller 1920s New York. The confrontation was being broadcasted in real time, with views from multiple angles; Altero knew that it was the Assault Shadow's internal holographic scanners being used to transmit the information.

    He crossed the road, and entered the Ministry of Truth. A flash of a government ID let him through the main doors. He slid into an elevator, and keyed in the number of the top floor. He better not be out, he though, reaching into his jacket and checking the Walther P99 was still there; obviously, it was, but it was one of those nervous tics that men who weren't quite supermen often experienced. The elevator open, and Altero entered, gun drawn. A short, but kind-looking man situated behind a simple desk gasped silently as he did. Altero relaxed, holstering the pistol, and walked into the office, paying little attention to the banks of television screens which formed the side walls of the office. He knew what they would be showing.

    "Altero?" asked the man. "Altero, you can't be here! The Ministry of Silence has tabs on the building - it's not safe!"

    "I'm not scared by the Ministry of Silence. I'm scared of the sea washing away our castle. Where's the broadcast coming from, Gascar?"

    Gascar wiped his forehead with the back of his hand. "I don't - I don't know."

    "Don't give me that S**t, Gascar. The Ministry of Truth decides what's said and heard throughout the entire Republic. The signal's being sent directly here. Where from?"

    "What will you do if I tell you?"

    "I'll intervene before Ascheron does something stupid that ends up destroying the Republic. My ship can make it there in time."

    "He'll kill you."

    "I'm willing to risk that. I never swore to protect my own life; I swore to protect the people of the Republic."

    Gascar sighed, and keyed in a few commands on his desktop interface. He flipped the screen around. A series of numbers appeared, which Gascar quickly memorized.

    "Thank you." he said, curtly turning to leave. As he did, the elevator opened, and two men in black suits, carrying katanas, stepped out. Altero raised his pistol and fired at the first, throwing him against the back of the elevator, but the second charged, slicing towards him. Altero deflected the blade with his steel toe-cap, and emptied the magazine of the pistol into the blade of the katana as he drew it towards the man's head, save for the last bullet, which he unloaded when the gun reached its destination.

    "Al-Altero!"

    "They've probably got the downstairs entrance covered. There's only one way out." He said, turning and sprinting towards the window. He kicked through it, leaping out into the sky, and began hurtling towards the pavement below. He slid back the sleeve of his jacket, and pressed a button on a wrist-mounted device, disappearing in a flash of blue light just before he impacted the ground.

    ------------------------------------

    <The Assault Shadow>

    "ENOUGH!" roared Ascheron, his booming voice thundering through the bridge. "The time for democracy has past, you soul-less bastards."

    Ascheron charged, leaping into the air, as if to land on Vexull and crush him. Instead, he began to slow, to the extent that he appeared to be hovering in the air just before Vexull. His arms moved in sluggish, dreamlike motions, a string of glowing blue energy trailing from his fingertips, forming patterns in the air which quickly faded. He shot his arms out behind him, the blue energy materializing as two blades shooting forth from this fore and index fingers. The intensity of the energy was such that it seemed to turn into liquid energy after a set period, dripping away from the blade like molten metal. He grinned, and suddenly disappeared in a flurry. The speed he had lost beforehand was made up for tenfold. Ascheron circled Vexull fast that the human eye could recognize, with a simple blur of color marking his orbit. He stabbed and sliced into Vexull repeatedly with both blades - nearly twenty times a second, and though the impact left no wound, blue energy spurting from the impact point like high-pressure blood suggested massive amounts of invisible damage. Instead of slowing down, he began to accelerate, until he shot from the orbit, landing behind the trio, both blades held out behind him. The amount of individual attacks was well over two hundred.

    "Jikan seishoku ryūki o: Prominence Attack!"
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Malygos on Sat Jan 17, 2015 4:33 pm

    <Dominaria, Dominion Engineering Facility Alpha>

    Malygos stepped down into the main room of the facility.  A cavernous, grand chamber illuminated by magical light tinged with violet, lined with half-finished machines of wondrous magitek, and obsessive, focused engineers, toiling away at their projects.  Each unique, each once and again flaring with the energy that would power the machine.

    But the centre of the laboratory was what truly drew the eye.  A massive skeletal structure of dark metal, resembling nothing more than the lower half of a dinosaur, with other parts, wings, a torso, and claws, suspended in midair, also being assembled.  A core of glowing red crystal stood at its centre, contained by multiple magitek fields.  The head of the project turned to greet Malygos, adjusting her spectacles.

    "Project Atma is proceeding as planned," Lynvara said.  "But, are you certain that-"

    "It is necessary."  Malygos sighed.  "One day, you'll understand - but not yet.  Project Atma is necessary."  They started to stride down the stairs, approaching the project proper, engineers turning to salute their lord and master.  "HYDRA is a snake that will inevitably betray us.  And we must be prepared, lest we lose the world."  They smiled at their elvish daughter.  "You will understand, my child; order and peace are paramount."

    He gazed at what they were creating.

    It could be none other than a weapon.

    ----

    <Mordor>

    "Not to break up this touching reunion," a smooth, silky voice said from the wall, "but we are eventually going to escape, I hope."

    The white skull mask and long violet hair that materialized from the shadows marked the speaker as none other than Hassan-i-Sabbah.  "Now, we have reached Figlio, but Mordor's a fortress, and getting out won't be easy.  Also, your hulking friend here managed to trip every alarm from here to Sunday.  You got a plan?"

    ----

    <Hell>

    "So, you've come before me, seeking help."  The slumped, pale figure of Mephistopheles had his grand black wings wrapped around his torso like a black cape.  He smiled, standing up, his long nails scraping against the black stone of his throne.  "What is it you require?"  His voice was deep, dark as you'd expect from a demon such as he.

    ---

    <Liquid Metallicon, Clinic>

    "Please, hold still."

    A man lay on the examining table, crying out.  The paralyzing and numbing agent that was standard practice out here in the slums of Liquid Metallicon wouldn't work on someone as hopped up on stims as he was.  He'd been in here before - a few broken bones from some unpaid debts from some less savory characters.  This, however, was a lot more serious - he was in critical condition, and the doctor needed to act fast.

    A white-gloved hand hovered over the gaping hole in the injured man's chest.  The doctor began to murmur and indistinct incantation in his gentle, soft voice, and his hand began to glow with the blue light of magic.  And just as quickly as it had been flowing out, the blood began to clot.  Flowing, healing, stiching the wound back together.  And soon, there was naught but a faded scar to show where once there was a wound.

    The man sat up, as the glow of magic faded.  "Thanks, doc.  I don't know where I'd be without ya here to patch me up after those scuffles."

    The doctor, a tall, slender man, surprisingly youthful of face, with wild, wavy blue hair that reached just down to the collar of his shirt, wearing rimless, oval glasses.  He had deep, blue eyes the same color as his hair.  "Please, try to be more careful, next time.  I can't pull you out of every ditch in Liquid Metallicon, you know.

    "Still, gotta thank you, Sachiel.  Not many people out there that'd take in a deadbeat like me."

    "Please, it is nothing.  Anyone decent would do the same."  He smiled, a slight sliver of a smile.

    The patient simple smiled, shaking his head, before heading back out into the streets.

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Near Lalli's Ship>

    "Not that this isn't such thrilling conversation, but I have something to discuss."

    A black-winged figure, Anzu, swooped down from a nearby building. "I had heard about the Claws of the Phoenix, to oppose him. The Dominion has a vested interest in the elimination of destructive elements such as Mazkertis. I wish to participate."
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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Heat on Sun Jan 18, 2015 10:20 am

    <The Pale Fire>

    Blackout: So, one dead, one captured, and one badly injured. That should keep the so-called Reformed Second Brotherhood from annoying us too much.

    Barricade: Two badly injured, actually. Ricochet was there too.

    Blackout: What? Why didn't I know about this?

    Barricade: Xintrix and I crushed him into a ball and played catch with him.

    Blackout: Oh, so that's where you guys were hiding.....

    -----

    <Saskana>

    Ynot: Trixitin?

    *Trixitin turns around to face them*

    Ynot: The gentleman asked a question.

    Trixitin: Um, yes. Yes, you see, those are Dominion ships, so barring a wholesale design revolution I'd imagine a mix. Technology for propulsion, but magic for power generation and weapons.

    Ynot: Can you use the same voodoo you used on my armour, on their engines? I'm not saying we'll need it, but I want to know what you're capable of.

    *Suddenly, the fighters begin to surround the Cabana and power their weapons*

    Hokagetsu: We're surrounded, guys.

    Ynot: Gotcha. Get Xeno, tell him.....

    Hokagetsu: Already in the Slayer room.

    Ynot: Good. Coro, the second they start firing, shut down their engines. That way we can get them all in one volley.

    TPK: Do you not fear damage to your ship?

    Hokagetsu: No, he doesn't.

    ---

    Strika: Oh, that is just not fair.....

    *The magic blasts blow off one of the ship's wings, crack the hull, and worst of all, knock out the thrusters*

    *The ship starts to plummet towards the sea*

    *Strika (and hopefully Perseus) brace for impact*

    -----

    <Mordor>

    Turel: I don't understand what you mean, Master.

    *Maly's post happens*

    *Turel gets angry, and stomps over to Hassan*

    Turel: I tripped no alarm! Who are you, anyway?

    ---

    *Meanwhile, the droids are tunnelling beneath the prison, using a more powerful version of the Nirak Laser-Drill IG-88 was recently equipped with*

    -----

    <Malchior IV>

    *Aster and Rainn arrive at the Spaceport, and after parking the car, they both (presumably) get out, and make their way up to the check-in area*

    *Aster walks up to a passing member of staff*

    Aster: 'Scuse me, ma'am. Where can I find Director Silverwater's office?

    Staff: Take the escalator, then keep going left until the business class lounge. His office is opposite.

    Aster: Thanks.

    *They move on, towards the escalator, when Aster suddenly notices somebody familiar in the crowd*

    Aster: Damn. Damn. *whispering* See that guy? *glances at a tall black man sipping coffee nearby* That guy's ZFT. I know him. I didn't think they'd get here this quick.

    -----

    <The Bat-Cave>

    F-Blackout: What? My-?  No. No no no no no. No. Rahn is not my daughter. We're not even related. Just look at me, then look at her. Just look at me! I'm blue!

    -----

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    Alan: That's nice, Mr. President. But this is different. You see, this is actually illegal.

    *He pulls several documents out of the folder. They all have TOP SECRET stamped across them*

    Alan: These are the details of Project Epilogue. A covert surveillance operation run by the NSA, launched by your predecessor when you were the Veep, and subsequently reauthorised by you. Spying on your own citizens, Mr. President. Why, this could sink you! If the newspapers got these files the same day I did, I think these revelations should make tomorrow's edition. What do you think?

    -----

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Ricochet teleports next to Caiaphus, but since his armour has been crushed into a ball, he obviously can't move or speak*

    Ricochet: *telepathetically* Yes, Caiaphus?


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    Re: BZPB

    Post by Klak on Sun Jan 18, 2015 1:40 pm

    <Malchior IV, outside Lalli's ship>

    *Klak smiles at the Toa. Anzu shows up, and says what he says. Klak stares at him with a scowl*

    Lalli Cain: "Dominion, hmm? Do you know a Spymistress Aluren, by any chance? If so, tell her Lalli Cain says hi."

    Me: Shut up Lalli.*he points to Anzu* You! The last time I had an alliance with the Dominion, your leader abandoned me on a distant planet and threatened my people with slavery and death! You have a lot of guts coming here and not expecting anyone to fight you!

    *Klak closes his eyes, and grits his teeth. He sighs*

    Me: But....all is forgiven. Arkhite, Ikhet, Nohex, Vyrrh, Anzu, welcome to the Claws of the Phoenix. The rest of the team may be here in the morning. Anyway, it's nighttime. It's been a long day, and we need rest. *He looks at Etende and winks* Especially you and Lalli. There's a storm coming, and we must be as prepared as possible.

    Lalli Cain: "I have a few beds in the sleeping quarters on my ship, but it's not enough."

    Me: There are beds for weary travelers in the church building. Unless one of you would rather sleep outside.

    *Everyone (presumably) disperses. Klak walks up to Lalli and puts his hand on his shoulder*

    Me: Sorry about that. Like I said, I've had a rather emotional day.

    *Lalli nods, and grins*

    *Klak walks up to Anzu*

    Me: Do you sleep? Makuta barely do.

    ---

    <Quolas' fortress>

    *Bob gets up, and nods at Quolas*

    Bob: "I'm fine, when are we?"

    Nadle: "Thank you, brother."

    *The group hears 1980s music playing outside for some reason*

    ---

    <Tunisia>

    *D-Klak immediately pulls out the gunblade that The Norman gave him. He aims it at one of the men*

    D-Klak: "As-salamu alaykum. My name is Klak. Yours?"

    ---

    <Stelta-Stal>

    *Caiaphus looks at both Xikella and Ricochet. His red eyes are filled with rage*

    Caiaphus: "Where is Starok?! Where is the other Kakamu? Where are the others? WHERE IS KIVALON?!"

    ---

    <Supermax 282>

    Doug: "Oh crap! We're in space! Oh my gosh! We're doomed!"

    *Dr. Bedge screams*

    Linkara: "Calm the heck down!"

    Paul Latza: "Yeah, take it easy!"

    ---

    <Mordor>

    Figlio: "Now, now, Turel. *laughs* A Hassan assassin, eh? How in the world did you find us?"

    Angonce: "You're in danger, and that is what you focus on? You are denser than I thought, Rider."

    Figlio: "Be silent, Angonce. Before I burn you."

    *For some reason, Figlio still has the shard of broken glass in his hand*

    ---

    <Liquid Metallicon, Clinic>

    *Fourteen bangs the door*

    Fourteen: "Doc, I need to talk to you."

    ---

    <Saskana>

    Coro: "Excellent plan, Ynot."

    *Coro sits down and starts concentrating*

    D-Klak (4): "Do you have any cannons? I'll provide some help if possible."

    Axalara: "We Knights will help too."

    --

    *Perseus creates a barrier around him and Strika using his ring*

    ---

    <Malchior IV>

    Rainn: "Do you need me to distract him, or do they have a description of my face in their database?"

    ---

    <The Bat-Cave>

    Anna Abernathy: "I'm not allowed to racially discriminate, sir. Anyway, I only see a problem with your plumbing. That can be fixed. Please do it soon. Good night."

    *She leaves. Rahn glares at F-Blackout*

    Julio: "She's cute."

    ---

    <Malchior IV, Senate>

    *The President glowered at Senator Skedaddle. His Space Southern accent is tinged with anger*

    Howard: "First of all, the project's name is NSA. To my knowledge, this alleged operation was run by another intelligence agency. Now, suppose I continued this as you so claim. You would release to the public information that one city, not an entire planet, but one city has been under surveillance since my predecessor. You convince the people that this is illegal, and wrong, despite the fact that our planet has been attacked several times in just the last few months. An assassin killed two precious allies. Terrorists have been running around causing chaos wherever they can. A massive battle we can barely explain killed two vital army operatives and nearly killed a war hero. Uterio War veterans were disappearing because our former enemies sent out robots to assassinate them....or at least that's what Klak said. In the past two years, Neo-Uterianism has been on the rise. ZFT and Blackout are threatening us. Malygos is threatening us. I'm probably missing half of our problems, and that's just global security issues. See, we just fought a war a few years ago, where an innumerable amount of our people were killed for something we didn't even start! So forgive me, Senator, for wanting to prevent the deaths of millions by respecting the wishes of my predecessor! But go ahead, release the contents of those papers! Get my friends on the Senate Intelligence Committee to back your legislative crusade! Have people laugh at how miniscule this is in the grand scheme of things! This is a battle I can win, but I need help for the other battles. That's why the program exists."

    *He stands up and puts his hands on the table*

    Howard: "I don't know about your oath, but mine demanded that I protect the Malchiorian people, regardless of the circumstances! Now the question is, Senator, are you with me, or are you against me?"

    *Alan gets a text from Vazquez*

    ((For the record: Not necessarily my views.))


    _________________



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      Current date/time is Sun May 28, 2017 8:27 pm