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    The Power

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    helo frens
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    The Power

    Post by helo frens on Sun Aug 19, 2012 6:04 am

    [This is a story involving my perception of the members of this forum. Do not take offense if the actions of the character I have made for you do not reflect yourself in real life.]

    Intro.

    Noir city has never been the center of attention to the rest of the world. Although it is large, and some of it's buildings touch the clouds, the amount of crime and political unsettling has always steered away tourists. Instead, the people living in Noir city almost live as if no other place exists. Not many people are seen by day, but by night, the city lights up, and people leave their jobs and their homes to enjoy the many nightclubs and other entertainment that Noir holds.

    The amount of crime has always been a big problem for Noir, as it is a big city. People started to divide. Gang culture is more prominent in Noir than most other places, but something is very different about the gangs in this place. They seem more... Self-contained. Even though the leaders of most of these gangs have not been identified, signs of these gangs are everywhere. On the walls, on people's clothes; you won't find a place in which you cannot recognize the sign of either the East, West, North or South, which are the four most prominent gangs in the city, and are all named after the side of the city they are based in.

    Recently, a new mayor has been elected. This was much to the anger of most of the gangs, as this mayor was determined to crack down on drugs trade, gang activities, and theft. The public have taken to calling him Adrastos, as gang culture has influenced so that people rarely call eachother their proper names.

    The latest rumors spreading around the streets are that the gang leader of the ruthless gang "North" has been identified as an extremely intelligent weapons scientist known by other members of the gang as Ynot. Fear is spreading through the city as word of another great gang war was heard by the public, and the police have been ordered to arrest anyone wearing typical North, East, South or West clothing.

    But this story does not directly follow the president and does not show what exactly is going on inside the other gangs.

    No, this story is instead about two people, who you would not think for a second that they would be involved with gang crime or the prospect of the island city being blown out of the water. I shall tell you about these people, for they are most important in what happens in this grim, dangerous place.

    It all starts outside the chained-off entrance to a deserted underground train system.




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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Sun Aug 19, 2012 6:06 am

    Ooh, nice intro Smile I look forward to seeing what's next!

    However, because I am a jerk, I'm gonna nitpick. "almost live as if no other place exists" would work better as "live almost as if no other place exists". Razz


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Zev the Reveler on Sun Aug 19, 2012 6:12 am

    I really, really enjoyed reading this intro.

    There were some minor hiccups, but still, this is a really strong opening to what I'm sure will be a great story.

    I can't wait to read more!!! 8D
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Klak on Sun Aug 19, 2012 10:22 am

    This made me laugh. Awesome intro you've got going on, I can't wait to read the rest XD


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Ferret-X on Wed Aug 22, 2012 1:01 am

    Oooh, nice way to justify using our forum names.

    I look forward to seeing what chaos I get up to *.*
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Yenot on Wed Aug 22, 2012 3:41 am

    This sounds epic, Shroom. Cant wait for it to start.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by helo frens on Thu Aug 23, 2012 7:24 am

    Chapter 1: "Ferret b!tch"


    "It's hot as hell today, man. Why are we even keepin' watch here?" One of the three South clan scouts complains as he cleans his orange-tinted shades with the sleeve of his red hoodie.
    "Because it's the border, dumbass." The largest, wisest looking scout replies, putting his head out of the corner to look up and down the street before returning to lean against the heavily vandalised wall. He puts his muscular arm round the third scout, a short young woman with her long, straight hair dyed red, dressed in yellow shorts and an orange tank top."You see anything yet baby?"
    "Nope." She replies. "But I'm sure that 'Ferret' bitch is runnin' around somewhere."
    The larger scout immediately frowns, adjusting his red beanie. "Yeah. Yeah, she'll be around somewhere."

    Many minutes pass until a faint scratching noise can be heard down the alleyway behind them. "I'll check it out." The young woman yawns as she tiredly makes her way down the alleyway and turns the corner. She doesn't like what she sees.
    A brownish-red haired young woman can be seen crouched in front of a wall with a can of spray-paint and a cloth. "Oooooh no... What the hell are you DOING FERRET BITCH!? SCRAM!" The scout screams after the young woman, who has already taken off running, yelling over her over shoulder.
    "LEARN TO GRAMMAR, PRICKS!"
    The scout, breathing stressfully, braces herself and looks at the wall that the woman, "Ferret" was crouched before. She lets out a scream of frustration.

    The wall, which was once covered with South clan territory tags, has now had several things spray-painted over or rubbed out. What used to be a South message saying "SOUTH FOREVER. EAT DAT ,HOE" now reads "SOUTH FOREVER ARE ILLITERATE. EAT DAT, HO# - IT'S SPELT "HO" NOT "HOE" LEARN TO WRITE MORONS" Her hands covering most of her face out of pure rage, the female scout walks slowly back to the other two. As she gets closer, the smaller scout gains a big smile, as he knows exactly what happened. The large scout asks anyway. "... Sh!t, what happened, baby?"

    The female scout nearly explodes.

    "DO YOU -KNOW- HOW MUCH TIME IT'S GONNA TAKE TO FIX THOSE TAGS, HEAT!? WE SHOULD FREAKIN KILL THAT B!TCH"
    Surprised at her outburst, the larger scout, Heat, tries to calm her down. "But Cinder, you know we can't kill members of the general publi-"
    "I -KNOW- THAT, HEAT, IT'S JUST THAT HALF OF MY WORK HAS BEEN PAINTED OVER BY THAT B!TCH"
    "Do you know where she lives?"
    "I DON'T EVEN UNDERSTA- yeah, I think I remember. Why ask?"
    Heat smiles proudly and adjust his red beanie. "I'm thinkin' we hang around that kid's house so that she can't sneak around on our shift." Cinder pauses, before lowering down the volume of her voice and speaking again. "So simple... Why didn't I think of that?" The couple smile and hug, while the other scout is struggling to keep on his feet while laughing hysterically.

    EDIT: I know it's a short first chapter, and I could've merged the first and second chapter into one, but yeah. I'm tired.



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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Thu Aug 23, 2012 7:42 am

    LOL

    That one was hilarious, Shroom. I liked "LEARN TO GRAMMAR, PRICKS!".


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Yenot on Thu Aug 23, 2012 9:04 am

    Loving it so far.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Klak on Thu Aug 23, 2012 9:37 am

    LOOOOL, very funny.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Zev the Reveler on Fri Aug 24, 2012 8:31 am

    That was quite funny!

    And I love the South Gang's whole theme. I can't wait to see the other Gangs.

    This is shaping up to be great.

    :3
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Ferret-X on Sun Aug 26, 2012 4:40 am

    I AM F*CKING AWESOME IN THIS. KEEP IT UP.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by helo frens on Wed Aug 29, 2012 11:58 pm

    Chapter 2: Feeling blue.

    Ferret groggily wakes up the next day, surprised that it isn't 4AM. Still half-asleep, she gets up and gets ready for the day. Slapping on some random clothes she had left in her wardrobe, finding some blue jeans and a light blue top. Still rubbing her eyes and typing on her computer, she finds herself out of pringles, and eventually wants more.

    The urge somehow being strong enough for Ferret do decide to leave her house on what was supposed to be a "Stay at home and eat stuff while drawing" day, she grabs her wallet and heads to the front door.

    Meanwhile, the three scouts, Rookie, Heat and Cinder, are all hanging around ferret's street, making sure they can keep an eye on ferret's house.
    "She even gonna leave her house? I'm freakin' bored." Rookie groans, flicking his orange-tinted ski-goggles out of pure boredom.
    "Why you gotta ask so many stupid questions?" Heat irritably replies. "If she don't come out then it's a good shift done. If she -does- come out? Well then we can catch 'er before she causes trouble." He takes off his orange-tinted shades to rub his eyes, while Cinder is hugging one of his arms.

    Long moments pass, and Cinder only -just- notices a young woman tiredly leaving her house.
    "She's there! Somebody run up to her!" Cinder whispers urgently, tugging on Heat's arm.
    "Waaiit waiiit... Are those north threads? She's in all blue..." They all pause. "It all makes -sense- now. Let's waste her."
    "YES!" Cinder shouts happily as she now has an excuse to do what she's wanted to do for a long, long time. The three scouts now run full-force at ferret, who hasn't even noticed them, and is slowly crossing the street. Slowly turning to the source of the loud, urgent footsteps, Ferret notices what is happening -just- in time.

    "Ooooohhh, sh!t."

    She runs as hard as she's ever done in her life, immediately sprinting towards an alleyway towards the end of South territory and ignoring the pain in her ankles.
    "COME BACK HERE YOU FREAKIN WORTHLESS B!TCH" Ferret can hear the voice of a young woman shouting behind her. She does not slow down, turning into every corner that might increase the possibility of getting the scouts off of her tail. Coming up to what seems like the border of South territory, Ferret stops to breathe, staring at the floor for a few moments and then looking around for a way to escape, still hearing angry voices not that far behind her.

    The very first thing ferret notices as she looks around urgently is the entrance to the abandoned subway station that everyone was told -never- to enter.

    She runs in without hesitation.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Ferret-X on Thu Aug 30, 2012 12:04 am

    Heh. That's me alright. BANZAI!
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Zev the Reveler on Thu Aug 30, 2012 9:17 am

    I really liked this last chapter.

    The build-up of suspense was great, and I liked the revelation about Ferret's allegiance. I also like how the little trio from South Gang is developing. Plus, you're taking things at a very nice pace; not too rushed, but not sluggish.

    I keep saying this, but I can't wait to read more. :3
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Yenot on Thu Aug 30, 2012 10:09 am

    Actually Zev, if you read closer, it doesn't reveal her allegiance.
    She just throws on random clothes, not caring about the color.
    The Scouts THINK she's North, but her actual allegiance is not proven.
    Anyway, great chapter, Shroom.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Thu Aug 30, 2012 5:20 pm

    Indeed, that was a great chapter. Looking forward to more!


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Klak on Fri Aug 31, 2012 9:42 am

    Lol, can't wait to see where this goes


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Yenot on Fri May 24, 2013 3:39 am

    Took a reread of this, makes me want it more.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Fri May 24, 2013 9:47 pm

    Indeed. I miss this.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by helo frens on Mon May 27, 2013 10:10 pm

    Took a reread of this and I couldn't NOT attempt to continue.

    Here goes.

    ---

    Ferret sighs with releif as she finally has time to think about what just happened. Why the hell did gang scouts attack her? "Aren't they supposed to not attack civillians to keep a good reputation among them? Maybe they thought I was something else... "

    "... GODDAMMIT."

    Why didn't she notice what she was wearing? Her frustrated voice echoes loudly, and it is only now that Ferret decides to look around and take in her surroundings. As she looks around, she is surprised, as there only seems to be a deserted version of what once was the old, populated subway station. Ferret remembers employees occupying the ticket booths, everyone bustling around and nobody making conversation. She takes time to sit and catch her breath before deciding to look around the area. Maybe she could find why the heck everyone deserted this place.

    Many minutes pass, and Ferret was seriously struggling to find a reason why anyone would leave. But as she turns a corner, she makes a sudden noise of surprise.

    "A north gang tag? Here?"

    It made no sense. How could north gang members ever get so close to south borders without anything starting? Ferret suddenly felt less safe wondering this dim, deserted subway station. She makes her way back, giving a backwards glance at the big, bold, blue letters "NRTH", with a blue arrow pointing upward, cutting through the "N".

    She guessed that even if north gang members found her, she'd be wearing their colours.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Tue May 28, 2013 3:35 am

    Good to see this back. :D


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    Re: The Power

    Post by helo frens on Mon Jun 24, 2013 9:25 am

    Jones walked slowly down the dimly lit street, looking at the ground with his hands in his pockets.  He was fed up with the constant arguments. Fed. Up. Why should they care what decisions the government makes? Whether or not the police put their foot down about gang violence makes no difference. The gang presence here has gotten too strong now. It’d take a military task force just to make it from one end of South to the other. And people are saying the South clan aren't even the worst? This city is going to sh!t. As if it wasn’t sh!t already.

    As Jones paced further and further, the amount of South tags on the wall grew considerably less. He didn’t know exactly where he was going, but he must be near the Middle. Going to the Middle was always a nice change. A small space of land, which no gang member dared to tread.  The houses here were actually kind of nice. There was a strange lack of broken windows or threats to outsiders written on the walls. 
    With the depressing sound of distant thunder, it started to rain. Jones thought he might as well find some sort of shelter from the constant onslaught of dim grey water. 


    Looking around at his surroundings more thoroughly for the first time in a long while of walking, he sees what looks like an entrance to a subway station. He doesn't remember seeing this one ever before. It looked run down, in contrast to the small area of average city around it. Even this close to the south border, there couldn't be anything going on down there, right? Jones was interested to see what a subway that wasn't heavily populated with hoods was like.  
    Cautiously walking down the steps, Jones quickly realizes that this subway is in complete contrast with the area above; he only had to descend down the steps for a short while until he noticed a graffiti tag. But it was strange, this graffiti tag consisted of a bold blue “N”. Ignoring this, Jones continues to make his way into the subway.

    “… Hello? His voice echoes throughout the completely deserted area. Jones suddenly notices how cold it is. The coldness comes with unsettling feelings of fear. Maybe this place isn't completely deserted? The prospect of exploring this seemingly abandoned subway station doesn't seem that appealing anymore to Jones. He slowly turns to leave. 
    To his surprise, he sees a woman sprawled on the ground to his left. How didn't he notice her before? Was she a drunk or something? “Uuhh… Excuse me?” The sound of his voice doesn't seem to have an effect on Ferret as she sleeps. “YO!” Again his voice echoes back at him, and Ferret seems to show signs of waking up.


    “Ugghhh… Who the hell are you?”


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Yenot on Mon Jun 24, 2013 9:57 am

    Finally we meet more people. I like where this is heading.
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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Mon Jun 24, 2013 9:37 pm

    Nice to see I'm finally in this Razz


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Klak on Tue Jun 25, 2013 7:25 am

    Nice new chapters!


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    Re: The Power

    Post by helo frens on Sat Feb 07, 2015 12:46 pm

    The woman stirs in a heap on the floor, making no signs of getting up any time soon. “Call me Jones, I guess.” The echoes of his own voice whisper eternally through the vast empty space of the abandoned subway. The cold becomes harsher, less forgiving. As every second passes, the great chill drifts further and further into Jones’… Bones. Had he ever felt cold in his bones before? Jones thought to himself. Something here isn’t right.

    “That’s a sh!tty nickname…” The woman replies, still in a slump on the floor. “Those gang pricks call me Ferret.”

    “It isn’t a nickna- Wait, I know you…” Jones begins to remember coming across sprawled angry orange graffiti littered around South, usually reading something like ‘F#CK YOU FERRET’ or ‘FERRET B!TCH’. What could she possibly have done to invoke the rage of the South clan? Hesitantly, Jones begins to ask.

    “Wait wait shhhh, shut the f#ck up for a second… Do you hear that?” Dust falls from the ceiling as the earth begins to shudder. Maybe this is just a train travelling through? It’s the only logical explanation. Ferret gets herself on her feet with surprising speed, and begins examining the shivering subway like the walls of a prehistoric cave, running her fingers over the fresh blue graffiti. “Aren’t these North signs? I must’ve had a rough night… Where are we?”

    “We’re still South. That’s the thing, this makes no sense.” Jones’ voice becomes slightly less confident as he talks. There really is something going on here.

    “So I’m assuming this is the abandoned subway, right?” Ferret pauses in frenzied thought. “Trains… Don’t run through here… Right?” The entire subway vibrates ever more violently as the two turn to each other. “F#CKING RUN.

    Too late.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Heat on Wed Feb 11, 2015 3:42 am

    oh fuck, I was supposed to comment on this, wasn't I?

    It's so great to see this back, man. I can't wait to find out what North are plotting.


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    Re: The Power

    Post by Kon on Wed Feb 11, 2015 4:22 am



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    Re: The Power

    Post by Klak on Thu May 07, 2015 3:07 pm

    Great stuff, mate.


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