BZPB

A Free-for-All Collaborative Fiction/RPG Forum with a Long-Lived Community!

View the BZPB Wiki for more information about the site and the BZPB Multiverse.


    Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Share
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Mon Jan 23, 2012 12:16 am

    Good [insert time of day here] LADIES AND GENTLEMEN!
    One thing about me is that I have always been a movie lover
    Through my eyes, the silver screen sparkles and dances.
    I attempted doing this before on BZP with my blog, but seeing as I only had access to it one week a year, it didn't work out. Now that this forum is up and going with a bit of steam, I figure now would be a good time to give it a try again.

    So, welcome to Ynot's Movie Reviews.
    Anytime I go see a movie on the Silver screen, or buy one on DVD to see it for the first time, I will post a review here.

    First movie for this thread shall be the one I saw just the night previous:


    Underworld: Awakening

    Grey, black, and navy blue are the color palette for this film. This isn't something I normally pay attention to, but it is extremely obvious in this flick. Every scene is dominated by these tones. The plotline is simple, Humans discover Vampires and Lycans actually exist and follow our most basic instincts. Kill them all. The movie starts a little after the second in the series, Evolution. When it picks up, Selene is running from the humans to meet up with Michael, her Hybrid Vampire-Lycan lover. When she arrives on the scene, he's about to be blown to bits, so she swoops in to save the day, but winds up getting a grenade to the face and blown into icy water. When she wakes up, someone is freeing her from an icy prison 12 years in the future.

    This is where the plot actually starts and set up stops. Selene begins seeing flashes of the world around her from someones else point of view, and this person is within a close vicinity to her. So naturally, she assumes that it must be Michael, and pursues. Eventually, she follows this person down a chute, and smacks right into another vampire who is clearly NOT Michael, and clearly not the person she was following. The two are circled by Lycans, Selene gets more flashes from whom she assumes is Michael just around the corner about to be attacked by the same Lycans. Fending off the animals, she finds a young girl, whom is only ever referred to through out the entire movie as 'that thing' or 'Subject 2', instead of the man she fell in love with. quickly gathering her up, the trio gets into a van and heads toward the modern Vampires Covenant, but on the road are attacked by more Lycans, and the girl is bitten and bleeds profusely.

    Eventually, after fending off the werewolf ambush, they make it to a small chamber beneath a dam where a small family of Vampires, about 20, live. One of thier number is able to heal the girl, and we learn a bit of back story in the process. The girl is also a Hybrid Vampire-Lycan and was born that way. she has also never drunken blood before this, which is why she sucks at healing compared to ever other non human. With blood circulating, the gashes heal instantly. Leader of the Covenant walks in and says Selene and the girl must go, as surely the Humans will be looking for the girl that broke out and the Death Dealer that has slayed so many. Speeches about survival, betrayal, loving thy neighbor and all that jazz follow. Door pounding begins, and Leader insists that Selene leave immediately, so not to bring harm to the Covenant. vampire boy from before says that they must take up arms, not hide like cowards, squabbles ensue while half the clan gears up for war while the other half hides with their tails between their legs. Selene naturally loads up here twin pistols that only just no have run out of ammo, after 1/3 of a movie has past and firing 50 rounds a second on numerous shots.

    After hiding the girl away, the doors finally bust down, and we expected guns to start blazing. Well, unfortunately for those inside, it's not the humans knocking on grandma's door. It's the Lycans, and they start tearing into the Vampires, Vampires start blasting Lycans. Once the tide turns for the clan Selene is alone in the main room with one last Lycan. Well, this Lycan is twice the size of any Lycan ever seen before. Big fight ensues, revealing this one isn't weak to silver like all the others, Selene gets her arse kicked unconscious. When she wakes up, the girl has been taken, almost all the clan is dead, and the leader is furious.

    As an overlapping story, this one detective has been reading up on Selene since he saw her break out of the Antigen Labs. Antigen being a company who's mission is to cure all non Humans, and produce a vaccine to make humans immune to being turned. The company wasn't truthful in regard to Selene and Subject 2's escape, so he gets suspicious.

    Back to Selene, sappy stories, and then she revives the Vampire she met just before the girl, who turns out to be Leaders Son. Marching out of the dam, she vanishes, scene cut, she's in front of detective guy. Detective guy is unsurprised about the Lycans still being alive even though they were, to civilian knowledge, extinct. Selene presses for information, Detective guy makes it clear that they shouldn't be discussing this in broad daylight in a parking garage. Scene shift to Police HQ. Discuss what Detective has dug up, and the two begin to suspect Antigen is corrupt. On this, the are close, as the next bit show that Antigen is run by Lycans, who have been using Subject 2s DNA to produce the Super Lycan, and that is in fact what their 'vaccine' will do, turn all Lycans in to Super Lycans, and Humans into normal ones.

    Selene and Detective storm the castle corporate office, things blow up in fiery explosions. Upon reaching the top, Selene finds Michael in a ice block like the one she is in, but at the same time, Detective Guy, who stayed behind to view security monitors and help without being in deaths path, is telling her that her daughter, oh, forgot to say that, didn't I? Yeah, lots of implications, then it's outright said that Subject 2 is Selene's little girl. Anyway, she's being taken away again by the Head Lycan to be broken down into fleshy bits to clone more of her. Yeah, that's some High octane nightmare fuel right there. So, while she can't thaw Michael out, and has to go save her daughter, she shoots the Ice block and runs for it.

    Meeting up in the parking garage with Detective Guy, the two make a stand against the Lycans, and for the most part do a pretty good job. Then Super Lycan drops in. And now I bet you want to know how it ends. Sorry, not happening. Want the ending, go see it yourself.

    Overall, it was a thrilling movie, and definitely worth the price of admission. Now, that being said, I saw it in 3D, and it was the gimmicky depth 3D that everyone has been doing, and not the reach out and slap you 3D. I have never agreed that this is a good idea, and this movie doesn't change my mind.

    Now go outside and get some fresh air, ya doggamn nerds. Even if it's only to walk to your closest Cinema.

    Ynot Out~
    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Mon Jan 23, 2012 12:32 am

    A cool review! I've never seen any of the Underworld films but now I'm tempted to start. I'm probably not gonna post my own film reviews, so I'll keep checking back here to see what you make of said movies. o7


    _________________
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Mon Jan 23, 2012 5:28 am

    The Underworld films always seemed slightly interesting for me. You, Ynot, have piqued this interest. Cool review. I was thinking about starting something like this, and you've inspired me to carry it over to BZP Blogs!


    _________________


    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Sat Feb 04, 2012 7:31 am

    In the future, I plan to see and review:
    • Chronicle
    • Secret world of Arietti
    • Wrath of the Titans
    • The Hunger Games
    • Justice League: Doom
    • Avengers
    • The Dark Knight Rises
    • Expendables 2
    • Skyfall

    Please let me know if you have suggestions to be added to this list


    Last edited by Ynot on Mon Dec 03, 2012 3:58 pm; edited 7 times in total
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Wed Feb 15, 2012 8:36 am

    Alright folks, time for my next movie Review

    This time, on the Chopping block is...

    Chronicle

    Well, the reason I took so long with doing this one is...well
    I didn't want to relive it. I really don't wan to think about this movie ever again.
    It was just not worth the money paid, period.
    So, I'm not going to give you in depth shtoof like the last one.

    Basically, nerdy kid buys camera, and that is how we see everything, his camera.
    His cousin drags him to a party he didn't care for, and gets his ass kicked.
    Moping by himself, the Class President Black Kid with the super infectious likeable personality finds him, and is like, 'Dude, found hole, bring camera'
    Super Powers follow, which are followed by hyjinks culminating in pushing a car off the road.
    Nerd keeps getting stronger until he accidentally...
    Go see it if you want the end.


    Actually, screw it, I don't want anyone to suffer this movie.
    He kills the lovable black guy, his mom dies, Dad tries to beat him, and goes berserk.
    Queue fight seen between nerd and Cousin, ending with Nerd getting a trident to the chest.
    Himalayas.

    If you want to see this movie still, wait to rent it. it is not worth buying.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Wed Feb 15, 2012 3:59 pm

    Wow. It's that bad? Sad


    _________________


    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Wed Feb 15, 2012 11:05 pm

    *splutter*

    Wow.


    _________________
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Thu Feb 16, 2012 6:35 am

    Sadly, yes
    Previews mad it look a lot better.
    Have to say, I like the camera work on it, but that's about it.
    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Tue Feb 21, 2012 6:04 am

    Actually, I just got a second opinion from a friend of mine, and it is no different than yours. Definitely not gonna see this.


    _________________
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Tue Feb 21, 2012 7:09 am

    Review number thee is upon us

    Things are a little different this time, as I went to see a movie from Studio Ghibli.
    As anyone IRL that knows me will tell, I LOVE Ghibli, as any Otaku worth their weight should.

    So, without further ado, I present you with the review for:

    The Secret World of Arrietti

    Now, before the actual movie part, I'll give you a little heads up. I had to go cross county to see this flick because only one theater, my personal favorite at that, was showing it in the entire county. this may sound like a hindrance to go see a movie. Honestly, I think it made it better. Showing Ghibli's masterpieces on inferior screens would have only degraded the movie.

    So, this tale begins as a young boy, Shawn/Sean(They didn't bother telling which spelling) pulls up to a very old house with his aunt, talking about how he needs to rest his heart and have no excitement for a while.

    Upon arrival, Sean(Easier to type that one, so I'm going with it) wanders into the backyard. It is at this point this studio shines with it's attention to detail, you can see every hand drawn blade of grass in radiant green. The vines wrap the house splendidly, and the trees sway in the wind like the would in life. Back to Sean, he spots a cat stalking something near a bush. When he approaches to investigate, the cat flees, and he looks into the bush to catch a flash of something small darting about and disappearing into the underbrush.

    At this point, the Aunt returns to his side and brings him indoors to meet Hara, the care taker of this estate. We also learn that this was where his mother grew up so long ago. Then we switch back to Arrietti, a girl that can fit in your hand, coming home from her excursion into the yard with several leafs. Her mother catches her climbing in through her window and scolds her for leaving the safety of their house. She bribes her mom to leave her be with two of he three leafs.

    Before I continue, I would like to attempt to describe our heroines room, as it is just breath taking. She has what appears to be a to scale full bed in the miniaturized room, with a bed table and dresser. Well, that's not the part that wowed me. Every square inch of the room Arrietti has been decorated with various leafs from outside. This makes the room appear like a jungle. Every leaf is different from the others, and there are dozens of different leafs adorning her walls.

    Anyway, back to the story. Arrietti gives her mom a bay leaf and a Tea leaf for her to use in her cooking. She is thrilled to have a fresh leaf, and decrees that the single leaf would last them a year. Arrietty is positively a stir about her first 'Borrowing' that night. Pretty sure I haven't mentioned this, so I will now. This story is based of The Borrowers which is about small people who 'Borrow' things from us humans. The rules for the borrowings is that it must always be things that we humans would not notice, and never more than they absolutely need.

    At this point, her father walks in, Arrietti jumping on him about going on her first borrowing that night. The mom asks him, revealing his name to be Pod, if she will be okay. Pod replies that there is a new 'Bean' or 'Being', I couldn't quite tell which, in the house. This worries the Mom more, but Pod reassures her that he is a young Bean(Going with that cause it's funnier), and the young ones tend to go to bed earlier. Arrietti then starts getting ready for her outing, putting on a plain red dress, and putting her hair up in a pony tail with a little clasp

    Cut to that night as they are leaving, packing up stuff, and wishes of safe travel. The start out on their journey through the walls of the house, walking over nails like stairs, and sing staples like ladders. Pod explains the rules of Borrowing to Arrietti again, to make sure she knows. Then they make it to their first stop of the night, the kitchen to get a cube of sugar. Upon entering through a hole in the cupboard, Arrietti is awestruck by how large this place is. Pod uses some string and a fish hook to grapple down to the floor, and tells Arrietti to wait there. He takes some two-sided tape and begins to climb to the top of the table and procures the single cube of sugar, which is about half his size. Arrietti follows now, grappling to the floor to stash the cube in her sling pack.

    After Pod makes his way down, they head to their next destination to obtain some tissue paper. Back into the walls they go, coming upon a device to bring them up to a high ledge. walking about, Pod shines a litle lantern below, showing rats racing about, telling Arrietti how filthy they are.

    Then we enter the next room, and at first, it seems like a trick perspective, as Pod seems to be the same size as the room they are in. Then we switch to Arrietti and we see this is no trick, but they are inside a doll house. Pod warns that nothing may EVER be taken from this house, as the Beans would know right away, and they would have to leave. They exit the doll house, and shimmy up to an end table with a tissue box on it. Arrieti opens up her pack and sets it down to climb up the box. Pod and Arrieti both take an end of the tissue and pull when Arrieti freezes. Just on the other side of the table is Sean in bed, staring right at Arrieti. She ducks beneath the tissue and signals to Pod that she's been seen. The two slide off the box when Sean speaks up, startling Arrietti causing her to bump into her sack and knock the cube back onto the floor. Pod tells her to leave it, and they make their way back to the house. Pod insists Arrieti not mention this incident to her mother, so to avoid frightening her pointlessly, and instead makes up a story about how his lantern gave out before they made it to the kitchen.

    In the morning, Sean's Aunt has returned to check on him, and he asks if she knows anything about 'Little people'. She becomes ecstatic, saying that Sean's mother and her father used to firmly believe that there were people living in the walls of the house, and his mother direly wanted to meet them, but never did. In a gesture of kindness toward the Little People, her father had the doll house built by hand, so that the little people could live in it. She explained that every little thing in the house worked, and had each hand crafted in England for a heft sum. Though, the Little people never came, and Sean's mother stopped believing and moved away.

    The Aunt then changes the subject, saying that he really ought to get some rest and not stress his little heart before a surgery. (Yes, they leave it at that for the moment, no further detail til later) Sean rests a bit while Hara answers the door bell ringing, and asks the Postman for the number of a good exterminator, thus revealing our villain for the story.

    Unfortunately, Imma have to end this tale there. Want to know what happens? Track down this jewel in a local theater and go see it. It is definitely worth the price of admission. I loved this story all the way up until the end, and would gladly advise others to see it before it is gone.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Thu Mar 29, 2012 8:45 am

    Didn't read the Arriety review. Might watch that one on my own then come back to you. Razz


    _________________


    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Tue Apr 03, 2012 5:39 am

    Buenos dias, Senors and senoritas!

    Today, you are in for a special treat, as today I bring you not one, but TWO movie reviews!
    On the slate today are both Wrath of the Titans and Hunger Games!
    What's that? I'm forgetting something? Trollface
    Quiet you, I know I never posted a review for Justice League Doom.
    Sorry, I procrastinated and forgot. I'll just quickly state that it was WONDERFUL and worth the buy.

    First up is:

    Wrath of the Titans

    The story starts with our Hero, Perseus, living a quiet life in a fishing village with his son, Helius. Life's good, even after his wife passed, and Perseus has pledged to make sure his son never uses a sword.

    Now, I'll pause for a moment to point out that Zeus went out of his way at the end of Clash to bring back his wife, who was supposedly immortal to begin with. Make of this what you will.

    Anyway, Perseus' world lands on it's ear when Daddy Zeus stops by and says since everyone has stopped praying, they are loosing their powers and everything the gods ever did will start coming undone. EVERYTHING. It is at this point you are supposed to remember the gods imprisoned the Titans long ago. No gods, no Prison, Titans on the loose. Sounds like a bad thing, eh? Zeus asks for Perseus' help, he declines.

    Cut to the next day, chimera attacking his village, and our man Perseus going back into action. While that's happening, Poseidon, Zeus, and Ares meet up to go talk to Hades and convince him into letting them help him repair the damage to the Titan's prisons. Queue backstabbing traitors. For the rest, get to your local theater to see.

    On to...

    The Hunger Games
    The Story follows the book pretty closely, which I read immediately prior to seeing the movie.
    Only a handful of errors I could note like missing minor characters, and certain scenes of lesser consequence being removed, as is the usual in Book movies. I would go into detail about the plot, but really, just read the book. Anything I say here isn't going to convince you as much as the authors own words. So instead, I'll just give the basic setting.

    In Panem, a post apocalyptic society has an annual reminder of a past rebellion and the total annihilation of the last of 13 districts, leaving 12 in tact to remember. This reminder is a fight to the death in arenas for the entertainment of the Capitol. Two Children, one male one female, between the ages of 12-18 are chosen every year to combat. 24 go in, 1 comes out to be bathed in riches and glory.

    Go read the book, then watch the movie. Ynot says it's worth the price of admission.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Tue Apr 03, 2012 5:56 am

    Well, looks like Wrath of the Titans won't be a disappointment. Also, I recommend "The Hunger Games". Seriously.

    Quiet you, I know I never posted a review for Justice League Doom.
    Sorry, I procrastinated and forgot. I'll just quickly state that it was WONDERFUL and worth the buy.

    Post. Review. Nao. :yaoming:


    _________________


    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Fri Apr 06, 2012 9:52 am

    I saw Wrath of the Titans today, thought it was a big improvement over Clash. They also seemed to have cleared up the crappy 3D in my cinema, so I watched it in that. Yay!

    WARNING POSSIBLE SPOLIAHS

    Your review of it is accurate, plenty of backstabbing traitors and the like. I was hoping it would be a trilogy, but going on how the end turned out, it looks unlikely there'll be another one.


    _________________
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Wed May 09, 2012 8:13 am

    *Ahem*
    MAHEM, DESTRUCTION, AND AWESOME SAUCE.
    That is what this next movie is made of.

    The Avengers
    Before I start, every word of this movie is spoilers to Thor, Captain America, and Iron man. If you haven't seen them yet, GTFO. I am not explaining those movies here.

    They gone? Good. The story starts in a S.H.I.E.D. HQ underground working with a glowing cube of pure power called the Tesseract. It opens a portal and Lokii shows up to cause Chaos, steal the Cube, Hawkeye, and the Scientist guy from Thor with mind control staff powers. The Base Blows up with only a handful of people making it out including Fury, his assistant, and the Agent fellow from Ironman and Thor. When asked what are they going to do, Fury replies What are THEY going to do. Who?

    Title Shot.

    Avengers, minus Thor, assemble from various locations. Captain is in his Gym, working out. Stark is in his New York Stark Tower, converting it to free power of his own making. Black Widow is in a hilarious interigation set up that has her set up as the 'interogatee' while she is the one getting the info she wants when a phone rings and it's for her. She proceeds to kick all the butt around and resumes her phone call. Lastly Hulk, rather Banner is in some South American country curing the sick when BW shows up and lures him out to a remote bungalo to calmly ask him to help LOOK for the Cube, not fight. Hulk Sma..oh, wait, no, Banner goes along quietly.

    Lokii Starts building a portal, larger than the one he came in. Scientist man and Hawkeye are helping. The last piece of the Puzzle is locked up somewhere, Hawkeye knows where, and just needs a distraction. Back at a random jet carrier, Rogers, Stark, Banner, Fury, and Romanoff get together and discuss their next move. Wait a minute, that's no Air Craft Carrier! That's a Hover Carrier!. Once inside, Stark is immediately suspicious and infects the others with said suspicion. After a couple of minutes, Stark has hacked S.H.I.E.L.D at the same time the Captain comes back from the storage rooms with Hydra Tech that S.H.I.E.L.D. had hidden. Both are furious at being lied to. Chaos begins to ensue, when Lokii shows up in the middle of a City.

    Want to know what happens next? Go watch the movie. It's worth the Price of admission twice over. Oh, and stay for the End Credit Scene KoN didn't get to see.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Wed May 09, 2012 8:17 am

    Looks awesome! I didn't see Thor but I don't think I really need to much, since I saw the others and kind of know what happened through part of it (though I should see it lol). The movie sounds just as epic as everyone says it is. Entertaining review, Ynot.


    _________________


    avatar
    ibrow
    The Quiet One...

    Posts : 1
    Coins : 2029
    Reputation : 100
    Join date : 2012-05-13
    Location : The DeLorean

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by ibrow on Sun May 13, 2012 7:30 am

    I agree, Avengers were worth every penny of the admission; Banner in particular was fantastic.

    -ibrow
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sun May 13, 2012 9:07 pm

    ibrow wrote:I agree, Avengers were worth every penny of the admission; Banner in particular was fantastic.

    -ibrow

    Welcome to the forum, iBrow!

    (For the record, I used to be -Blackout-.)


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:05 am

    Welcome back to Ynot's Movie Reviews, folks.

    It's been a hot minute since my last one, and before I continue, I will let you know I had to ATTEMPT to see this movie twice, because the first time life said screw me.

    The Dark Knight Rises

    The Movie opens with some shifty looking men in suits taking three men with their heads covered up in a jet under the premise of one of them knowing the location of a Terrorist Mercenary Named Bane. After Interrogating the first two, with not a single word, the Third speaks up with some confusing quips. The man with a gun goes to interrogate man number three, pulling off the head bag, revealing that man #3 is in fact, Bane. Grand Theft Aero. Plot Setting.

    At a party at Wayne manor celebrating 8 years passing since Harvey Dents death, Selina Kyle slips into the inner sanctum of the manor, where Bruce stays since Batman retired, to steal his mother's pearls. To do so, she trips Bruce. Normally this would be impossible, but in the 8 years since hanging up his cape, Bruce has become a cripple, relying on a cane to move about. So, tripping the cripple and slipping out a window, the plot starts moving.

    Want more? Go watch. Sorry for the short intro, but, really, seeing this movie for yourself is best. It is not only the cost of admission, but it is worth it to go see in the most expensive way possibly available to you. The BEst Theater, with IMAX and/or 3D.
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:07 am

    So, in other words, TDKR is the best movie ever and I must watch it? Razz


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:08 am

    SPEND YO MONEY!!!
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:11 am

    I can't.



    Scrooge is staring at me already and I think he may kill me if I actually do spend my money.


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:12 am

    WakingHour wrote:I can't.



    Scrooge is staring at me already and I think he may kill me if I actually do spend my money.

    but drj pls



    _________________
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:17 am

    Scrooge Says:



    Last edited by Dee-Are-Zay on Fri Aug 24, 2012 8:42 pm; edited 1 time in total


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:04 am

    scrog pls dolan is bes meem evar an cradit to intarnet unliek oboma

    Anyways, I want to see this movie.


    _________________


    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:52 pm

    I might see it after I see the previous two properly.


    _________________
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:53 pm

    Who was the first one's villain? I know TDK had Joker and Two-Face, and this has Bane, but I don't remember the first one.


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:55 pm

    WakingHour wrote:Who was the first one's villain? I know TDK had Joker and Two-Face, and this has Bane, but I don't remember the first one.
    I did some research and it's Scarecrow and Ra's Al Ghul.


    _________________
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Sat Aug 11, 2012 10:00 pm

    Yep, and the Mafia.

    I've seen the previous two, and liked them. I know I won't be disappointed with TDKR.


    _________________


    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Tue Aug 21, 2012 8:16 am

    Good afternoon Ladies and Mentalmen

    It's time for another movie review.

    Today I would be reviewing

    Expendables 2

    Except...there's nothing to review.
    This movie has virtually no plot, and what it does have is so basic and plothole ridden it's pointless.

    The movie starts at the end of some mission rescuing a Chinese national billionaire that we find out Schwartzanegger got caught trying to save as well. After taking Terry Crews' Gun, he practically vanishes from then on. They take their rescuee head to escape, and Statham and Stallone get separated form the others on Zip line. Which works to their advantage, as this introduces Billy the Kid, new youngster on the block working to provide for his future wife.

    After Billy saves Stallone and Statham, they get into their plane and head to pick up the others, who are riding down a river on a jetski boat thing... what ever. after much shooting and explosions, all expendables are on the plane, and they narrowly make it over a dam. Drop Li off over China with the Billionaire

    Title shot.

    Back in their home town bar, they are celebrating Statham getting married to the cheating girlfriend from 1. Stallone gives him crap about it. Billy asks to talk to Stallone outside. Says he wants out, and will serve with them til months end. Which is just enough time for one last gig.

    Stallone goes to his beaten down airplane to think about life. Willis pops out and is like, 'Hey, you should be in jail for what you did in the last movie. But I'm a nice guy, and kept you out. Do this job and it'll stay that way. Oh, and babysit this hot Asian combat Safe cracker chick while you're doing it'. Stallone, knowing h can't say no, takes the job, which Willis describes as a cake walk.

    Meet the Asian.

    Fly random Asian country. Find plane wreck that they were looking for. Billy take high ground to watch our flanks. crack safe inside of Plane, let's go home. Van Damme says not so fast, we found your sniper and will kill him if you don't hand over the contents of that safe. Stallone complies. Dead Billy anyway, and Van Damme gets away.

    "What now?" "Track 'em, find 'em, kill 'em!"

    Head to your local theater to get more. the rest of the movie is essentially fan service after fan service with jokes and line swapping all around. It's a fun movie to watch with plenty of gratuitous violence that will keep you grinning all the way through, but after that line, the plot just falls apart. So go enjoy some Baby seal and Whale @$$.
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Tue Aug 21, 2012 8:25 am

    Best film review ever.


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Tue Aug 21, 2012 9:52 am

    Just as I expected, can't wait to watch Expendables 2.


    _________________


    avatar
    Kon
    Prophet of SUS
    Prophet of SUS

    Posts : 2354
    Coins : 12984
    Reputation : 7352
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 20
    Location : Location Location

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Kon on Tue Aug 21, 2012 2:53 pm

    I like fanservice as much as the last guy, but sometimes it shouldn't be the only thing holding the main plot together. I'll have to see it myself before commenting further though.


    _________________
    avatar
    Klak
    Resident Klak Expert

    Posts : 3577
    Coins : 13520
    Reputation : 7015
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 116
    Location : Yes

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Klak on Tue Aug 21, 2012 7:23 pm

    King of Nynrah wrote:I like fanservice as much as the last guy, but sometimes it shouldn't be the only thing holding the main plot together. I'll have to see it myself before commenting further though.


    Don't worry, it's not Anime fan service. :yaoming: But you're correct.


    _________________


    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Mon Dec 03, 2012 4:31 pm

    Good evening, one and all.
    The name is Ynot. Makuta Ynot. Tonights entertainment shall be a review of the Bond Film,
    Skyfall
    You may ask if I expect you to care.
    No, I expect you to read this and decide on whether or not to go see the movie yourselves.
    Going into this review, should you choose to continue, note that I have not seen the previous two Bond films in their entirety, the second at all.
    I saw the movie in IMAX, and it did justice to the vast array of Bond cliches that were brought back into the series or lampshaded after the likes of Casino Royale.
    The movie begins in Turkey. Bond and a female agent who remains nameless to the final few moments of the movie in pursuit of a man who has obtained a hard drive listing numerous undercover MI6 agents. All the staples of a Bond chase are present. The crashing, the explosions, the improbable escapes, the works. Eventually leading to a fight on top of a train, and the female agent being forced to take a shot at the squabbling pair. Unfortunately, she hits Bond instead of the bad guy, dropping him off a cliff into a ravine, allowing the bad guy to get away.
    Title sequence, and rejoining M several months later, when MI6 HQ is blown to bits, leaving her unharmed, but the organization in shambles. News of this reaches a clearly still alive Bond who has been in Turkey since then. He makes a swift return to London to be debriefed and checked out physically and mentally. During which, we discover bond can't shoot his gun straight anymore, missing his targets horribly. During the psych eval, there is a title drop, and Bond storms out. M gives him the green light, and sends him to find the man who stole the Hard drive in the first place to find out who he works for.
    Bond arrives in Hong Kong, and after setting up, the female agent from before knocks on the door, and informs him that the first 5 names on the hard drive have been leaked on to Youtube, 3 of which were killed before they could be pulled out of undercover. Bond starts his mission, tailing the man from airport to office building made of glass. He catches up to the man, apparently mid mission, as he drills a hole into the outside wall, and assembles an rifle to kill someone in the adjacent building, which he manages to pull off, just before Bond gets to him. Fight scene ensues, lots of broken glass and flashy lights, resulting in Bond hanging on to the man as he dangles outside the window, asking who he works for. This is where we get our first indication Bond is getting old. The man slips through Bonds fingers, as he simply can't hold on, and the man pancakes on the street below.
    Hold on a tic, though! All hope is not lost! The mook has a poker chip in his briefcase from a very specific casino in hong kong, with it's address printed on it.
    I'll stop the story there, and speak to the other aspects of the movie. This movie brings all the things that were off about the earlier Bonds back into focus and corrects them. Bond Driving an Astin martin with Ejector Seat, preferring his martini 'shaken, not stirred', even his hair becomes darker over the course of the tail. Anything that seemed unlikely for the real world that happens in other bond flicks is also lampshaded, like Q mentioning that his department doesn't do 'exploding pens' anymore.
    The visuals on this movie are breath taking at times, and others simplified to perfection. There were several instances I was blinded by a white screen, though, and that's about the only detractor I can muster.
    This movie is worth the price of admission several times over. Go. NOW.
    avatar
    Heat
    Baron of Thunder-ten-tronckh

    Posts : 4229
    Coins : 31365
    Reputation : 24132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 6
    Location : A swirling vortex of uncertainty

    Character sheet
    Level: 1
    Class: Scout
    EXP:
    0/0  (0/0)

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Heat on Sat Dec 08, 2012 5:19 am

    Ynot wrote:This movie is worth the price of admission several times over. Go. NOW.

    Seconded.


    _________________
    Bo tutaj jest jak jest, po prostu, i ty dobrze o tym wiesz.
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Fri Sep 13, 2013 1:04 pm

    Some days, it seems like the entire universe is out to kill you. Others, it actually is.

    Today we review Riddick: Rule The Dark

    This Movie picks up some years after Chronicles, on a random desert planet where the Necromorphs have left Richard B. Riddick for dead, like so many others before him. It starts with the titular character monologing about letting people get to close, and becoming soft as a result. He then goes on a montage of finding the tougher creatures of the planet, consisting of a Dingo Dango type thing, a two legged scorpion that lives in dark and moist places, and a buzzard/vulture that is dealt with immediately.

    His first attempt with the dingoes is less than successful, due to being near dead already. They wind up chasing him into the den of the Scorpion creatures, which kill most of the dingoes allowing Riddick to flee. Ordinarily, I would say running away is out of character for Riddick, but he learns from the experience and winds up killing both a day later, and adopting a puppy dingo as a companion.

    We next see him a fair amount of time later, as the Puppy is full grown now, and the two have a repertoire that suits Riddick nicely. The dingo gets upset at rain in the distance, like, days off, but Riddick gets a bad vibe and calls for some Mercs to come and try to take him away, of course, so he can leave the planet.

    Two crews show up, one very Kill all, and one very By the Book, the latter being lead by the Father of an old villain from Pitch Black, Johns. He wants to know how his son died, and can care less about the massive bounty on Riddicks head, unlike the former squad.

    At this point the movie is essentially Pitch Black all over again. Kill some people, make a deal, get caught, restate the deal with more urgency, get released, start killing monsters. If you want more detail, go see the movie.

    Worth the cost of Admission
    avatar
    Yenot
    Resident Continuity Expert

    Posts : 2363
    Coins : 7434
    Reputation : 3132
    Join date : 2010-11-08
    Age : 25
    Location : Land of Paradoxes and Shadow

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Yenot on Sat Jul 05, 2014 10:53 am

    Alright Maggots, I got an new movie review for you.
    This one is focusing on Transformers: Age of Extinction.
    I have to make one thing very clear out of the gate. I loved Transformers 1-3. So you might expect a bias. That said, this movie failed to deliver on all the things that I was expecting of it. Explosions? Minimal. Dinobots? Minimal. Unicron? None.

    The movie is about NewGuy McNobodyCares, his high school senior daughter, and NewGuy's best buddy Larry.(I'm not shitting you, that's his name). NewGuy is an inventor based out of his barn in The Middle of Nowhere, Kansas and makes no money doing this. It starts off showing him picking through a closed up movie theater/strip club where he finds a beaten down old semi truck. He buys it with larry's money and tows it back to his barn, where after some exposition he starts to work on it, and Optimus rises again. In the mean time we learn that the government, specifically the CIA, isn't friendly with the Autobots anymore, and is hunting anything that transforms down to kill them.

    Now right here I have a problem about who they chose to allow back into the move. You probably think I'm going to say something about Shia LeBouf or Megan Fox/s substitute. Nope. My problem here is that in the last three movies we had a side character that was in the military and helping the Autobots all along the way, Srgt O'FrikYou. O'FrikYou and his buddy Blacky BringTheRain would have fit perfectly in this movie as an ally to the on the run autobots, but he's nowhere to be found, or mentioned. Nor is the rest of the NEST team from Revenge of the Fallen and Dark of the Moon. I get that it's supposed to be, like 5-10 years later, and people move on, but they could have had ONE familiar character outside Bee and Prime.

    ANYWAY. The CIA gets word that Optimus is alive and go to hunt them down. Queue Chase scene where Larry Dies, and Daughter gets a Boyfriend. Boyfriend is a professional driver, as luck would have it, and Irish, leading to him being refereed to as Lucky Charms. Somewhere in all this chaos we get the backstory that the Transformers are made of this element called Transformium(again, actual name). The Greedy humans have learned that they can melt this stuff down and make it into anything they want, and have it transform into anything ELSE they want. This of course leads to them making... Take a guess. I'll give you a minute.

    Did you say a My Little Pony Plush that turns into an AK-47? Then you'd be right. Only one though, the rest is an army of mindless Decepticons. I don't even have to elaborate from here on what follows. Dinobots show up at some point. Go watch it, but don't pay full price. I'd recommend a Matinee showing.

    Sponsored content

    Re: Ynot's Movie Reviews

    Post by Sponsored content


      Current date/time is Wed Aug 23, 2017 8:42 am