By popular demand, I am going to repost BZComedy, my most successful BZPower comedy, here.
BZComedy - Episode One - The First Episode, duh
It was a typical day on the BZPower forums. And by typical, I mean nothing was happening, because no one was actually on the BZPower forums, they were sitting in front of their computers posting posts and topics.
Suddenly, something began to happen. And by something, I mean that a huge black and grey robot had just appeared out of nowhere.
"Wow. It seems that I, -Blackout- have physically entered the BZPower forums." the robot said and began to explore his new surroundings.
Meanwhile, somebody was watching him on a very large viewscreen.
"EXCELLENT. THE TEST SUBJECT HAS BEEN SUCCESSFULLY TRANSFERRED INTO THE VIRTUAL WORLD. PROCEED WITH THE FULL-SCALE TRANSFER." said that somebody.
"THAT IS UNWISE. WE DO NOT KNOW WHETHER THE DEVICE IS CAPABLE OF TRANSFERRING THIS MANY PEOPLE AT ONCE." said someone else.
"YOU ARE OUTSIDE YOUR FUNCTION, CYBER-LIEUTENANT. PROCEED WITH THE FULL-SCALE TRANSFER OR YOU WILL BE DELETED." said the first somebody.
"AFFIRMATIVE, CYBER-LEADER." said the "Cyber-Lieutenant" and pushed several buttons. "THE DEVICE IS ACTIVE. MEMBER TRANSFER IS UNDERWAY."
"EXCELLENT. NOTIFY ME WHEN THE TRANSFER IS COMPLETE." said the Cyber-Leader.
"THE TRANSFER IS COMPLETE." said the Cyber-Lieutenant.
"EXCELLENT. DEPLOY THE ARMY. TAKE OVER THE FORUMS." said the Cyber-Leader.
Meanwhile, back at -Blackout-'s location.....
-Blackout- was exploring his new surroundings. While he was doing that, something else happened. And by something else we mean that someone else had arrived. This someone else appeared to be a multi-coloured Toa Nuva (the 2003 version, of course) wearing a Kraahkan. For some strange plot-related reason, a subtitle which stated his name appeared directly in front of him.
"Ynot? What are YOU doing here?" said -Blackout-.
"Uh, I have no idea. What are YOU doing here?" said Ynot.
"I have no idea." said -Blackout-.
"Hm."
Suddenly, the two heard footsteps behind them. Since they had no idea who was behind them, they immediately did the most sane and sensible thing and hid behind a giant air freshener that had appeared out of nowhere. For some reason, this actually worked, and whoever had been but isn't behind them anymore did not see them.
"CYBER-UNITS 1137 AND 1138 HAVE ARRIVED AT THE "No "bionicles"" TOPIC IN BIONICLE STORYLINE & THEORIES. NO MEMBERS HAVE BEEN DETECTED." said one of the whoevers, who looked like a silver humanoid robot with handlebars on his head and the letter "C" on his chest.
"NEGATIVE, 1137. I HAVE DETECTED MEMBERS IN THIS TOPIC. THEY APPEAR TO BE NEARBY. REAL NEARBY." said the other whoever, who looked exactly like the first whoever.
"THX, 1138. NOW, WHERE COULD THEY BE?"
"LET'S CHECK BEHIND THIS GIANT OUT-OF-PLACE AIR FRESHENER."
"YES, UNIT 1138."
Both Cybermen marched towards the air freshener.
"Oops. They're coming this way." said -Blackout-.
"Thank you for stating the obvious. Now, do we fight them, run, or otherwise deal with them?" said Ynot.
"I say fight."
"I say fight also. .....How do we fight these guys anyway?"
"Okay, they look like Doctor Who villains, so there's gotta be a reset switch around here somewhere."
Ynot looked around. "I see no reset switch. In fact, I see no switch of any kind."
"Okay. We'll just have to fight them in a completely ridiculous way." said -Blackout-. He then pushed the air freshener they were hiding behind, causing it to fall and crush Unit 1137.
"HOSTILE ELEMENTS WILL BE DELETED!" said Unit 1138, and began to fire his laser at -Blackout-.
"Delete THIS!" shouted Ynot and hit Unit 1138 in the head with a briefcase he had somehow obtained in the last few seconds.
Unit 1138, apparently unharmed, turned towards Ynot.
"DELETE. DELETE. DELETE!" it said and began to fire his laser at Ynot, who somehow blocked the shots with the briefcase he had just used to hit 1138 in the head.
Suddenly, 1138 stopped and turned around.....to see -Blackout-, who had a laser cannon sticking out of his chest.
"I WOULD LIKE TO POINT OUT THAT THERE IS A LASER CANNON CURRENTLY STICKING OUT OF YOUR CHEST. YOU MAY WISH TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT." said the Cyberman.
"Okay." -Blackout- said and fired said laser cannon. When the smoke cleared, the Cyberman was intact.....except for its head, which was now floating around in orbit. The laser cannon then disappeared into his chest.
"Cool." Ynot said.
"That was actually the first time I ever got to use that." said -Blackout-. "Now we should probably leave before more of these things appear."
"IN THAT CASE YOU ARE TOO LATE."
"Darn it."
The two looked around.
"Uh, we've got a problem."
"Thank you for stating the obvious."
"I ALSO THANK YOU FOR STATING THE OBVIOUS."
"You're not part of this conversation."
"I SEE."
"May I point out that all your troops save you and another guy are defeated?" said -Blackout-.
"NO YOU MOST CERTAINLY CAN NOT. WAIT.....ALMOST ALL MY TROOPS HAVE BEEN DEFEATED?"
"Yes. Now if you'll excuse me, I always wanted to do this." -Blackout- said. He then grabbed both Cybermen and smashed them together. "Now, let's get out of here."
"Okay." Ynot said and began to walk away.
"No you imbecile, like this!" -Blackout- said and suddenly turned into a helicopter. "That's the advantage of having a Transformer avatar. Get in."
Ynot climbed onboard.
The helicopter then lifted off.
NEXT TIME:
More stuff happens! Yay!
(Just in case anyone notices: Yes, I'm leaving out the word counts. They were necessary on BZP, but this isn't BZP.)
BZComedy - Episode One - The First Episode, duh
It was a typical day on the BZPower forums. And by typical, I mean nothing was happening, because no one was actually on the BZPower forums, they were sitting in front of their computers posting posts and topics.
Suddenly, something began to happen. And by something, I mean that a huge black and grey robot had just appeared out of nowhere.
"Wow. It seems that I, -Blackout- have physically entered the BZPower forums." the robot said and began to explore his new surroundings.
Meanwhile, somebody was watching him on a very large viewscreen.
"EXCELLENT. THE TEST SUBJECT HAS BEEN SUCCESSFULLY TRANSFERRED INTO THE VIRTUAL WORLD. PROCEED WITH THE FULL-SCALE TRANSFER." said that somebody.
"THAT IS UNWISE. WE DO NOT KNOW WHETHER THE DEVICE IS CAPABLE OF TRANSFERRING THIS MANY PEOPLE AT ONCE." said someone else.
"YOU ARE OUTSIDE YOUR FUNCTION, CYBER-LIEUTENANT. PROCEED WITH THE FULL-SCALE TRANSFER OR YOU WILL BE DELETED." said the first somebody.
"AFFIRMATIVE, CYBER-LEADER." said the "Cyber-Lieutenant" and pushed several buttons. "THE DEVICE IS ACTIVE. MEMBER TRANSFER IS UNDERWAY."
"EXCELLENT. NOTIFY ME WHEN THE TRANSFER IS COMPLETE." said the Cyber-Leader.
"THE TRANSFER IS COMPLETE." said the Cyber-Lieutenant.
"EXCELLENT. DEPLOY THE ARMY. TAKE OVER THE FORUMS." said the Cyber-Leader.
Meanwhile, back at -Blackout-'s location.....
-Blackout- was exploring his new surroundings. While he was doing that, something else happened. And by something else we mean that someone else had arrived. This someone else appeared to be a multi-coloured Toa Nuva (the 2003 version, of course) wearing a Kraahkan. For some strange plot-related reason, a subtitle which stated his name appeared directly in front of him.
"Ynot? What are YOU doing here?" said -Blackout-.
"Uh, I have no idea. What are YOU doing here?" said Ynot.
"I have no idea." said -Blackout-.
"Hm."
Suddenly, the two heard footsteps behind them. Since they had no idea who was behind them, they immediately did the most sane and sensible thing and hid behind a giant air freshener that had appeared out of nowhere. For some reason, this actually worked, and whoever had been but isn't behind them anymore did not see them.
"CYBER-UNITS 1137 AND 1138 HAVE ARRIVED AT THE "No "bionicles"" TOPIC IN BIONICLE STORYLINE & THEORIES. NO MEMBERS HAVE BEEN DETECTED." said one of the whoevers, who looked like a silver humanoid robot with handlebars on his head and the letter "C" on his chest.
"NEGATIVE, 1137. I HAVE DETECTED MEMBERS IN THIS TOPIC. THEY APPEAR TO BE NEARBY. REAL NEARBY." said the other whoever, who looked exactly like the first whoever.
"THX, 1138. NOW, WHERE COULD THEY BE?"
"LET'S CHECK BEHIND THIS GIANT OUT-OF-PLACE AIR FRESHENER."
"YES, UNIT 1138."
Both Cybermen marched towards the air freshener.
"Oops. They're coming this way." said -Blackout-.
"Thank you for stating the obvious. Now, do we fight them, run, or otherwise deal with them?" said Ynot.
"I say fight."
"I say fight also. .....How do we fight these guys anyway?"
"Okay, they look like Doctor Who villains, so there's gotta be a reset switch around here somewhere."
Ynot looked around. "I see no reset switch. In fact, I see no switch of any kind."
"Okay. We'll just have to fight them in a completely ridiculous way." said -Blackout-. He then pushed the air freshener they were hiding behind, causing it to fall and crush Unit 1137.
"HOSTILE ELEMENTS WILL BE DELETED!" said Unit 1138, and began to fire his laser at -Blackout-.
"Delete THIS!" shouted Ynot and hit Unit 1138 in the head with a briefcase he had somehow obtained in the last few seconds.
Unit 1138, apparently unharmed, turned towards Ynot.
"DELETE. DELETE. DELETE!" it said and began to fire his laser at Ynot, who somehow blocked the shots with the briefcase he had just used to hit 1138 in the head.
Suddenly, 1138 stopped and turned around.....to see -Blackout-, who had a laser cannon sticking out of his chest.
"I WOULD LIKE TO POINT OUT THAT THERE IS A LASER CANNON CURRENTLY STICKING OUT OF YOUR CHEST. YOU MAY WISH TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT." said the Cyberman.
"Okay." -Blackout- said and fired said laser cannon. When the smoke cleared, the Cyberman was intact.....except for its head, which was now floating around in orbit. The laser cannon then disappeared into his chest.
"Cool." Ynot said.
"That was actually the first time I ever got to use that." said -Blackout-. "Now we should probably leave before more of these things appear."
"IN THAT CASE YOU ARE TOO LATE."
"Darn it."
The two looked around.
"Uh, we've got a problem."
"Thank you for stating the obvious."
"I ALSO THANK YOU FOR STATING THE OBVIOUS."
"You're not part of this conversation."
"I SEE."
"May I point out that all your troops save you and another guy are defeated?" said -Blackout-.
"NO YOU MOST CERTAINLY CAN NOT. WAIT.....ALMOST ALL MY TROOPS HAVE BEEN DEFEATED?"
"Yes. Now if you'll excuse me, I always wanted to do this." -Blackout- said. He then grabbed both Cybermen and smashed them together. "Now, let's get out of here."
"Okay." Ynot said and began to walk away.
"No you imbecile, like this!" -Blackout- said and suddenly turned into a helicopter. "That's the advantage of having a Transformer avatar. Get in."
Ynot climbed onboard.
The helicopter then lifted off.
NEXT TIME:
More stuff happens! Yay!
(Just in case anyone notices: Yes, I'm leaving out the word counts. They were necessary on BZP, but this isn't BZP.)